.:Maximum Freedom is found under God’s Authority:.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
This verse is pretty straight-forward.
Who must submit to authority? Everyone
Why must everyone submit to authority? Because God established it.
Who is God? What is your view of God? What place does God have in your life?
The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Stop me if you’ve heard this -
In the beginning, GOD created the heavens and the earth.
God was here first…… not you and not me
Every sentence has a noun and a verb. In Genesis chapter 1, every sentence has a noun and a verb. The noun in every sentence is the same. (Read it)
Job 40 and 41 (probably one of the most powerful expressions of who God is)
Job’s response in Job 42: 1-6
How many of you have a problem with you mom or dad giving you the answer, “Because I said so…”? Why is that?
Isaiah 6:1-5
The prophet Isaiah had a vision of the awesomeness of who God is, and he describes it.
Let me make a counter-cultural statement
We don’t submit to our parents authority, and we don’t submit to the legal authorities, because we don’t have a proper understanding of our place. We don’t understand where we fit. Every part of us is wanting to create our own boundaries instead of living inside boundaries that are already created. In short we have a desire to be the ultimate authority of our own lives. I make the rules. The problem is that there is only one ultimate authority, and that is God.
Who is God, that I should listen and obey? The Bible tells us that God is love. God is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. God is fair. It also very clearly tells us that God is the Ultimate Authority (The Stone was rolled away)
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Breakout Session Guide -
Is “Because I said so” ever an adequate reason for obedience? Why or Why not?
Have your parents ever asked you to do something that you didn’t do on purpose? What was it and why didn’t you do it?
Name five authority figures (or 5 relationships that you have – my parent; my coach; my teacher; my probation officer; etc…) who you have deliberately disobeyed at any time in your life. (Name more if you can)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
What would cause you to make the decision to not obey the instructions of an authority figure? (Is there something that you are expecting from them before you will obey them? Are you just stubborn?)
Sunday, March 4, 2007
7 Checkpoints: Ultimate Authority - Ultimate Freedom
Trudy was a good girl. She usually did what her mom said, but today was different. She was 16 years old today. Today she would get her driver’s license. She would experience freedom like she never had before. Trudy’s mom was a little bit on the strict side. Trudy didn’t think her mom would ever let her grow up. There was so much that she wanted to experience. She just felt like her mom was holding her back. Anyway, there was this guy at school named, Tom. Tom was really popular. He had an edge about him. There was something dangerous about Tom that was attractive to Trudy. Tom had something that Trudy desperately wanted. Tom had freedom, at least that what Trudy thought. Friday night was the big party at Tom’s house and Trudy was invited. She knew that her mom would never go for it. Her mom had heard about teenage parties. She would say that they were nothing more than a bunch of doped up and drunk teens having sex. Friday night came and Trudy really wanted to go to the party so she decided to lie to her mom and tell her that she was going over to her friend Cindy’s house and that she would be out late. Her mom agreed to let her go.
Trudy drove over to Tom’s house. A couple of her friends were already there. She wanted to experience what it meant to be free. She saw the cooler of beer in the corner, popped one open and began to drink. She was standing next to the cooler when Tom walked up to get a beer. Their eyes met, and Tom began to talk to her. She couldn’t believe it. Tom was actually talking to her. They both downed a couple more beers. She was really experiencing freedom now. Half way through the party Tom had managed to corner her in the bathroom, and then tried to take advantage of her. Luckily, her friend, Rachel, had seen Tom follow her in, and was able to stop him. When Tom left, Trudy was on the floor in the corner of the bathroom crying. She couldn’t believe what had happened. Is this what freedom felt like? If this was freedom, then it was definitely overrated. Rachel took her home. When Trudy got home, she saw her mom and told her everything that had happened. They both cried. Trudy cried because of the experience, and her mom cried because she never wanted Trudy to have to experience something like that.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
Everyone is always following something or someone. If you aren’t following someone (parents, teachers, law enforcement, friends), then you are following some idea, and that idea holds you captive. People’s idea of complete freedom is interesting, because whatever they are going for is defined. You would think that true freedom is completely undefined. I can do whatever I want. There will always be boundaries. Let’s pretend that there are absolutely no rules whatsoever. I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
How many of you have seen the movie Braveheart? Braveheart is the story of a Scottish man named William Wallace. During his time, the English ruled the Scottish. The English would come in on the day of a wedding and would rape the bride so that she would hopefully become pregnant with an English baby and they would in turn ‘breed’ the Scottish out. The Scottish lived in fear of the English. William Wallace stepped up and began to lead the Scottish to victories over the English. Eventually he was captured and was to be tortured to death by tying his intestines to a horse and having the horse pull them out. What was his last word? FREEDOM!!!!
Eventually, the Scottish won their freedom from the English. What do you think the Scottish did? They set up their own government. They made their rules to live by, and set up men to enforce the laws.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
God designed us. The Bible says that God knew you even before you were born. He knows what is best for our lives. He knows what rules to live by. They are pretty much common sense.
Do to others, as you would have them do to you.
The greatest commandment is ‘Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, and strength.’ The second greatest commandment is like it, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Honor your father and mother that it may be well with you….
Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
#1 – If you don’t then you will be subject to punishment by the authorities.
#2 - It is a conscience issue. If the government is asking something of you that is contrary to what God asks, then we must follow God rather than men, but be prepared to pay the consequences for that act. (Acts 5:29)
#3 – For Jesus sake (When Jesus returns we want to be found faithful)
God wants us to have the best life possible.
That means that we trust God.
That means that we set up solid moral boundaries.
That means that we learn to see the world the way that God sees it.
That means that we make sure that we have healthy friendships.
That means that we make sure that we are making good choices.
That also means that we listen to and obey the authorities that God has placed in our lives.
------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
1) How would you define freedom?
Notes – Hopefully this is pretty straightforward. Then again….=)
2) What keeps you from experiencing freedom in your life?
Notes – This is getting at any rules or restrictions that they have on their lives right now. Some of them don’t drive yet. Maybe they don’t have a job so they can’t get any money (no money = no fun)
3) Have you ever done something that your parents or someone else told you would be a bad idea to do, but you did it anyway? Did you find out that they were right?
Notes – As luck would have it they probably won’t have ever experienced anything like this. At least not they will say, but we’ll ask anyway. Who knows maybe someone will be open about this. Another alternative question might be – Have you ever done anything that you know you would get in trouble for if your parents found out? What types of things could have gone wrong because of what you did? What would happen if your parents found out about it?
Trudy drove over to Tom’s house. A couple of her friends were already there. She wanted to experience what it meant to be free. She saw the cooler of beer in the corner, popped one open and began to drink. She was standing next to the cooler when Tom walked up to get a beer. Their eyes met, and Tom began to talk to her. She couldn’t believe it. Tom was actually talking to her. They both downed a couple more beers. She was really experiencing freedom now. Half way through the party Tom had managed to corner her in the bathroom, and then tried to take advantage of her. Luckily, her friend, Rachel, had seen Tom follow her in, and was able to stop him. When Tom left, Trudy was on the floor in the corner of the bathroom crying. She couldn’t believe what had happened. Is this what freedom felt like? If this was freedom, then it was definitely overrated. Rachel took her home. When Trudy got home, she saw her mom and told her everything that had happened. They both cried. Trudy cried because of the experience, and her mom cried because she never wanted Trudy to have to experience something like that.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
Everyone is always following something or someone. If you aren’t following someone (parents, teachers, law enforcement, friends), then you are following some idea, and that idea holds you captive. People’s idea of complete freedom is interesting, because whatever they are going for is defined. You would think that true freedom is completely undefined. I can do whatever I want. There will always be boundaries. Let’s pretend that there are absolutely no rules whatsoever. I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
How many of you have seen the movie Braveheart? Braveheart is the story of a Scottish man named William Wallace. During his time, the English ruled the Scottish. The English would come in on the day of a wedding and would rape the bride so that she would hopefully become pregnant with an English baby and they would in turn ‘breed’ the Scottish out. The Scottish lived in fear of the English. William Wallace stepped up and began to lead the Scottish to victories over the English. Eventually he was captured and was to be tortured to death by tying his intestines to a horse and having the horse pull them out. What was his last word? FREEDOM!!!!
Eventually, the Scottish won their freedom from the English. What do you think the Scottish did? They set up their own government. They made their rules to live by, and set up men to enforce the laws.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
God designed us. The Bible says that God knew you even before you were born. He knows what is best for our lives. He knows what rules to live by. They are pretty much common sense.
Do to others, as you would have them do to you.
The greatest commandment is ‘Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, and strength.’ The second greatest commandment is like it, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Honor your father and mother that it may be well with you….
Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
#1 – If you don’t then you will be subject to punishment by the authorities.
#2 - It is a conscience issue. If the government is asking something of you that is contrary to what God asks, then we must follow God rather than men, but be prepared to pay the consequences for that act. (Acts 5:29)
#3 – For Jesus sake (When Jesus returns we want to be found faithful)
God wants us to have the best life possible.
That means that we trust God.
That means that we set up solid moral boundaries.
That means that we learn to see the world the way that God sees it.
That means that we make sure that we have healthy friendships.
That means that we make sure that we are making good choices.
That also means that we listen to and obey the authorities that God has placed in our lives.
------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
1) How would you define freedom?
Notes – Hopefully this is pretty straightforward. Then again….=)
2) What keeps you from experiencing freedom in your life?
Notes – This is getting at any rules or restrictions that they have on their lives right now. Some of them don’t drive yet. Maybe they don’t have a job so they can’t get any money (no money = no fun)
3) Have you ever done something that your parents or someone else told you would be a bad idea to do, but you did it anyway? Did you find out that they were right?
Notes – As luck would have it they probably won’t have ever experienced anything like this. At least not they will say, but we’ll ask anyway. Who knows maybe someone will be open about this. Another alternative question might be – Have you ever done anything that you know you would get in trouble for if your parents found out? What types of things could have gone wrong because of what you did? What would happen if your parents found out about it?
7 Checkpoints: Wise Choices - God's Will
Sarah sat on the couch with her Bible in her lap. She randomly opened the Bible and dropped her finger on a word. Sarah was about to graduate from high school, and was really scared about her future. What was next for her? Where would she go to college? Should she go to college? The first question she had to answer was, “What do I want to be when I grow up?” Sarah’s little sister, Heather, walked up and sat down beside her.
H – What are you doing?
S – I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be when I grow up?
H – Do you think that the Bible will tell you that?
S – I was kind of hoping…
H – What about a dentist?
S – The office smells, and people’s mouths are gross.
H – How about a lawyer?
S – They work too much.
H – You know my friend’s mom is an administrative assistant, and I think that she likes her job.
S – I don’t know. Does anyone really ever start out in life saying, “I want to be an administrative assistant or I want to be middle management?” Most jobs are just where people end up, and not really what they really want.
H – Sarah, I really don’t care what you decide to be. I look up to you because you are my big sister. I’m more interested in you, than in what you do with your life.
S – Thanks, Heather. You’re the best sister ever!!!
Heather got off the couch, and went into the kitchen to help her mom get dinner ready. Sarah looked down at her Bible to see what verse she had landed on. Maybe it would answer all of her questions.
S – Isaiah 26:3 You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in You.
Somehow Sarah understood that God would take care of her, and that was enough. She closed her Bible and went into the kitchen for dinner.
First things first –
Your future is out there, and I don’t think that it’s a stretch to say that thinking about the future can be a frightening thing. You make decisions every day. Every decision that you make has the potential to change something about your life or the lives of others. Sometimes that change can be very drastic and sometimes not so much.
A man I work with told me that his son is going to head off to the Navy after he graduates which will be in about a month. I said, “That’s neat, but you’re going to have a very sad mother on your hands.” This is her first son leaving the house, and not only is he leaving, there is very real potential that he could be heading into a life that could be very dangerous and life-threatening. Then he told me that his other son is going to start studying to be a lawyer. I told him that his son should make very very sure that he wants to be a lawyer, because he may not like the life that comes with it. Lawyers work excruciating long hours. Those hours are all very detailed, and to my mind, they are stressful. He’ll have to go to very expensive school for several years. At the end of which, he will have school loans in the 100,000’s that will have to be paid off, and the only way to pay bills like that off is to be a lawyer or a doctor. He’ll be stuck.
My neighbor and I work at the same company. When we see each other outside, one of the first questions that we ask is, “How’s work?” He made an interesting comment to me the other day. He said, “My brother in law is starting the interview process to become a policeman this week. I’m really happy for him, because he has wanted to be a policeman for as long as he can remember. Very few people end up doing what they really want to do. Look at me, I consult clients on their companies insurance plans. Doing this for a living never even crossed my mind growing up. I didn’t even know that a job like this existed, but here I am. At least I’m getting paid.”
We all have dreams and goals. Sometimes they come true, and sometimes they don’t. Life happens. You get married. You need money. You have to work to get money. You find a job, and there you are. You are a carpenter’s apprentice. You are a stockboy at Dominick’s. You are working in a bank. For most people these are not dream jobs, but it’s what they do. Then every once in a while someone gets their dream job.
We spend a lot of time wondering what we’re going to be when we grow up. Usually we are really asking ourselves, “What am I going to DO when I grow up? The question we should really be concerned with is “WHO am I going to be, and what does God want me to do for Him?
God’s will for your life is to be like Him, perfect.
Philippians 1:6
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
God calls everyone who believes in him to be in the ministry.
Mathew 28:18-20
And Jesus came up and spoke to them saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
God calls some to be in the ministry AS their job.
God calls some to be in the ministry AT their job.
Ephesians 4:11&12
And God gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors, and some as teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ.
God has chosen to call me to be a pastor, more specifically a youth pastor. I wish I had some magical story about how that happened, but I don’t.
All I know is that when I was graduating from high school, I was on one track, and that was to be a pastor. I sat in my friends car on day after church with her mother, and they asked me where I was going to go to college and what I would major in. I said, “I’m going to Moody Bible Institute in Chicago to be a pastor.” They said, “Really. You’re too spastic to be a pastor. You should be a youth pastor.” So I said, “OK”. So that’s what I did.
Sometimes, I still wake up wondering, “Am I doing what God wants me to do?” I spoke to a woman 2 days ago who confessed to me, “I’m 50 years old, and I still ask the question, What does God want me to do with my life?”
1. Start a relationship with Christ
2. Pray
3. Read your Bible
4. Talk to people about it who can give you good counsel
5. Be alert to what God is doing in your life
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Breakout Session Guide B.S.L. stands for Breakout Session Leader -
1. Spend some time talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Celebrate their decisions with them. Encourage them on towards their goals.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Why?
BSL – Many of our dreams and aspirations are self-centered. They are what we want.
What God wants has never entered out minds. What is going to bring me pleasure in
This life? When our perspective is that true joy and contentment comes with pleasing
God, then we can begin to really answer that question, and trust that we will be happy
With that pursuit.
2. Encourage them further that their focus needs to be on who they will be as opposed to what they will do. What we do is a direct response to who we are. As adults we know that our career paths hardly characterize us as people.
3. If the group is willing, take some time praying for one another and that we will become what God wants us to become.
H – What are you doing?
S – I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be when I grow up?
H – Do you think that the Bible will tell you that?
S – I was kind of hoping…
H – What about a dentist?
S – The office smells, and people’s mouths are gross.
H – How about a lawyer?
S – They work too much.
H – You know my friend’s mom is an administrative assistant, and I think that she likes her job.
S – I don’t know. Does anyone really ever start out in life saying, “I want to be an administrative assistant or I want to be middle management?” Most jobs are just where people end up, and not really what they really want.
H – Sarah, I really don’t care what you decide to be. I look up to you because you are my big sister. I’m more interested in you, than in what you do with your life.
S – Thanks, Heather. You’re the best sister ever!!!
Heather got off the couch, and went into the kitchen to help her mom get dinner ready. Sarah looked down at her Bible to see what verse she had landed on. Maybe it would answer all of her questions.
S – Isaiah 26:3 You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in You.
Somehow Sarah understood that God would take care of her, and that was enough. She closed her Bible and went into the kitchen for dinner.
First things first –
Your future is out there, and I don’t think that it’s a stretch to say that thinking about the future can be a frightening thing. You make decisions every day. Every decision that you make has the potential to change something about your life or the lives of others. Sometimes that change can be very drastic and sometimes not so much.
A man I work with told me that his son is going to head off to the Navy after he graduates which will be in about a month. I said, “That’s neat, but you’re going to have a very sad mother on your hands.” This is her first son leaving the house, and not only is he leaving, there is very real potential that he could be heading into a life that could be very dangerous and life-threatening. Then he told me that his other son is going to start studying to be a lawyer. I told him that his son should make very very sure that he wants to be a lawyer, because he may not like the life that comes with it. Lawyers work excruciating long hours. Those hours are all very detailed, and to my mind, they are stressful. He’ll have to go to very expensive school for several years. At the end of which, he will have school loans in the 100,000’s that will have to be paid off, and the only way to pay bills like that off is to be a lawyer or a doctor. He’ll be stuck.
My neighbor and I work at the same company. When we see each other outside, one of the first questions that we ask is, “How’s work?” He made an interesting comment to me the other day. He said, “My brother in law is starting the interview process to become a policeman this week. I’m really happy for him, because he has wanted to be a policeman for as long as he can remember. Very few people end up doing what they really want to do. Look at me, I consult clients on their companies insurance plans. Doing this for a living never even crossed my mind growing up. I didn’t even know that a job like this existed, but here I am. At least I’m getting paid.”
We all have dreams and goals. Sometimes they come true, and sometimes they don’t. Life happens. You get married. You need money. You have to work to get money. You find a job, and there you are. You are a carpenter’s apprentice. You are a stockboy at Dominick’s. You are working in a bank. For most people these are not dream jobs, but it’s what they do. Then every once in a while someone gets their dream job.
We spend a lot of time wondering what we’re going to be when we grow up. Usually we are really asking ourselves, “What am I going to DO when I grow up? The question we should really be concerned with is “WHO am I going to be, and what does God want me to do for Him?
God’s will for your life is to be like Him, perfect.
Philippians 1:6
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
God calls everyone who believes in him to be in the ministry.
Mathew 28:18-20
And Jesus came up and spoke to them saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
God calls some to be in the ministry AS their job.
God calls some to be in the ministry AT their job.
Ephesians 4:11&12
And God gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors, and some as teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ.
God has chosen to call me to be a pastor, more specifically a youth pastor. I wish I had some magical story about how that happened, but I don’t.
All I know is that when I was graduating from high school, I was on one track, and that was to be a pastor. I sat in my friends car on day after church with her mother, and they asked me where I was going to go to college and what I would major in. I said, “I’m going to Moody Bible Institute in Chicago to be a pastor.” They said, “Really. You’re too spastic to be a pastor. You should be a youth pastor.” So I said, “OK”. So that’s what I did.
Sometimes, I still wake up wondering, “Am I doing what God wants me to do?” I spoke to a woman 2 days ago who confessed to me, “I’m 50 years old, and I still ask the question, What does God want me to do with my life?”
1. Start a relationship with Christ
2. Pray
3. Read your Bible
4. Talk to people about it who can give you good counsel
5. Be alert to what God is doing in your life
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Breakout Session Guide B.S.L. stands for Breakout Session Leader -
1. Spend some time talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Celebrate their decisions with them. Encourage them on towards their goals.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Why?
BSL – Many of our dreams and aspirations are self-centered. They are what we want.
What God wants has never entered out minds. What is going to bring me pleasure in
This life? When our perspective is that true joy and contentment comes with pleasing
God, then we can begin to really answer that question, and trust that we will be happy
With that pursuit.
2. Encourage them further that their focus needs to be on who they will be as opposed to what they will do. What we do is a direct response to who we are. As adults we know that our career paths hardly characterize us as people.
3. If the group is willing, take some time praying for one another and that we will become what God wants us to become.
7 Checkpoints: Wise Choices
The bus had just dropped Jamie off in front of his house. That’s when Jamie realized that he had forgotten his homework assignment in his locker at school. This was an important assignment. It meant the difference between passing and failing his Sophmore year.
Jamie didn’t know what to do. Just that morning, his mom had warned him about what would happen if he forgot his homework one more time. He would have to take summer school, and do both his and his sisters chores for the whole summer. He couldn’t tell his mom that he forgot it again. He had to think of something and fast, because his mom had already seen him get off the bus.
Mom – Hi, Jamie. I’ve got some cookies inside. How was school today?
N – Jamie thought to himself,
Jamie – “I’ll avoid the conversation altogether until I think of something.”
Jamie – Hi, Mom. I’m starving. Do we have milk?
N – Jamie wasn’t really starving. He was stalling.
Mom – I asked you how school was today.
Jamie – School is school. It’s not great. It’s not horrible. It’s just school. More importantly, how was your day?
N – Now Jamie’s mom knew that something was going on here. The last time that Jamie asked his mom about her day was…….Never.
Mom – Jamie, where is your homework? I called your history teacher today, and she told me that you had a 3 page worksheet to complete and a chapter to read.
N – Busted. Was there a way out of this? Jamie thought to himself
Jamie – “If I say I forgot it, then I’m stuck in summer school and I’m doing Julie’s chores. History isn’t until after lunch. I can do my homework during lunch, and then noone will ever know that I didn’t do it tonight. I’ll tell my mom that I finished it on the bus. No that won’t work. She’ll want to see it. I’ll tell her that I finished it in study hall. She doesn’t know when my study hall is. That’s what I’ll say.”
Jamie – I finished that in study hall today. It was so easy. The questions were fill in the blank right out of the book. I just read the chapter and answered the questions as I went along. It was so easy. You could have done it.
Mom – I’m going to trust you, Jamie. If you are lying to me, then you will pay the consequences. By the way, I invited your teacher over for dinner tonight. I’m looking forward to talking about what you read today in study hall.Jamie probably didn’t make the wisest choice. Jamie lied to his mother. I wonder what dinner will be like for Jamie.
I want to read something to you. Open your Bibles to Ephesians 5:15-17.
That’s on page ______.
Tonight we are going to focus on those last six words, “The will of the Lord is”
The words, “God’s will,” seem to take on all kinds of different meaning, and bring out different emotions. Sometimes there is fear and uncertainty. Other times there is a indescribably peace and a strength that comes from the comfort of God’.
There’s a new country song out that actually made me cry. I couldn’t help it. It was about a little boy named, “Will”. He was handicapped, and a lady took care of him during the day. She would take him to the park, and they would play. He had a great attitude. It made her realize that if Will could get through the pain that was a part of his life, she could get through the pain that was a part of hers. In the end of the song we learn that Will only has a couple of months left to live, and Will and his mother are leaving to go to California to see a specialist. Will give his babysitter a card that just says, Thank you from Will and God.
That was a really nice play on words, but what is God’s will really? Many people ask the question, “What is God’s will for my life?” How will I know when I have achieved God’s will for my life?
The term “God’s Will” seems to me to be a bit mysterious and unapproachable until we break it down a little bit, and make less scary.
You have a will. You have willpower. “I had to eat that last donut. I just don’t have enough willpower. You got up this morning, because you willed it. You said, “I have to go to school. I will get up, and go.”
Another way to say this is that you have desires. Your teachers and your parents have desires, too. They desire that you get a good education, and that you attend school in order to that. You may not necessarily desire that for yourself, but you accept their desires for you and you go to school.
So lets change the question, “What is God’s desire for my life?” What does God want for me?
#1 – God wants you to have a relationship with Him.
1 Corinthians 1;9 – “God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have everlasting life.”
Jesus Christ died so that this would be possible. He shed His own blood on the cross for you and for me. He loves you that much. You need to hear that, “God loves you. He cares about you and he has a wonderful plan for your life.”
#2 – God wants you to have a good life.
John 10:10 – I came that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
God created you on purpose. He also created you for a purpose. God desires that we worship Him. He desires that we grow to be more like Him.
Philippians 1:6 – “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He desires that we tell others about him. He desires that we have close relationships with eachother, and that we serve eachother
#3 – God wants your desires to be His desires.
Jamie’s mom and his teacher both want Jamie to succeed. They don’t want Jamie to fail and have to go through summer school to catch back up with his friends. Jamie wants to have fun and ‘enjoy life’. He doesn’t want to spend his time doing homework. He’ll do much better in school if he chooses to desire the same thing that his mom desires.
Tom wants to be an awesome drummer someday. When his teacher tells him that he will need to practice several times a week, he’s telling him because he wants Tom to succeed. If Tom chooses not to be obedient to his teacher, then he will only be a mediocre drummer who is capable of keeping a beat with a few little cymbal crashes for emphasis.
We all have choices to make every day. We can be wise or we can be foolish about our choices. When your desires are the same as God’s desires, then you will be making wise choices, unlike our friend, Jamie.
N – Later that afternoon Jamie walked up to his mom in the kitchen, because he knew that he had to make things right.
Jamie – Mom. I have something to tell you. I lied to you earlier. I didn’t do my homework yet, and I forgot it all in my locker. I guess that this means that I will be doing Julie’s chores for the summer, huh.
Mom – Jamie, I know that you lied to me. I’m your mother. It hurt that you didn’t think that you could tell me the truth the first time. I am glad that you were wise enough to come and set things straight. You will have to do some of Julie’s chores this summer, but because of your honesty you’ll only have to do them twice a week. As for your homework, your teacher is bringing over an extra copy of the book and an extra copy of the worksheet. I called her when I realized that you weren’t telling me the truth. She’ll be here in about an hour for dinner.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L stands for Breakout Session Leader -
Have you ever been in a situation like Jamie’s? What did you do? Were you wise?
BSL – Story time. If you can think of a story from your own life, then share it. Let them
Do the same. Wise = Choosing right
What is your will? What is your will for being here tonight? Why are you here? What is it about The Grip that satisfies your will?
BSL – Let them answer how they want. Encourage all of the answers, and really
Encourage the great answers. J
1) Julie rushed home. “Good”, she thought, I beat Mom to the mailbox. Midterm progress reports were out. The failure notice in geometry would definitely not be a big hit. Since the divorce, Julie’s mother had been bugging her to improve her grades. Julie had tried, but Mr. Bradshaw didn’t teach geometry very well. Julie vowed to improve her grades. She knew she could do better. Why upset her mom when the quarter grades don’t count anyway?
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Genesis 12:11-13
2 Kings 6:19-23
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 20:17
Jeremiah 17:9
2) Kim’s parents believed her again when she told them she didn’t know she was an hour late. They trusted her. Kim didn’t think it was her fault that she had to stretch the truth so often. She believed she wouldn’t have to do it at all if her parents weren’t so strict. Her curfew was just too early. All of her friends were allowed to stay out much later. Kim had tried talking to her parents several times, but they didn’t seem to listen.
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 23:25
Proverbs 30:11
Romans 7:11
Romans 7:18-23
Colossians 3:20
BSL – Pick one of the 2 above situations. Have the students in your group look up the
Verses. You may get nothing out of the verse or it may be great. Just have an open talk.
Jamie didn’t know what to do. Just that morning, his mom had warned him about what would happen if he forgot his homework one more time. He would have to take summer school, and do both his and his sisters chores for the whole summer. He couldn’t tell his mom that he forgot it again. He had to think of something and fast, because his mom had already seen him get off the bus.
Mom – Hi, Jamie. I’ve got some cookies inside. How was school today?
N – Jamie thought to himself,
Jamie – “I’ll avoid the conversation altogether until I think of something.”
Jamie – Hi, Mom. I’m starving. Do we have milk?
N – Jamie wasn’t really starving. He was stalling.
Mom – I asked you how school was today.
Jamie – School is school. It’s not great. It’s not horrible. It’s just school. More importantly, how was your day?
N – Now Jamie’s mom knew that something was going on here. The last time that Jamie asked his mom about her day was…….Never.
Mom – Jamie, where is your homework? I called your history teacher today, and she told me that you had a 3 page worksheet to complete and a chapter to read.
N – Busted. Was there a way out of this? Jamie thought to himself
Jamie – “If I say I forgot it, then I’m stuck in summer school and I’m doing Julie’s chores. History isn’t until after lunch. I can do my homework during lunch, and then noone will ever know that I didn’t do it tonight. I’ll tell my mom that I finished it on the bus. No that won’t work. She’ll want to see it. I’ll tell her that I finished it in study hall. She doesn’t know when my study hall is. That’s what I’ll say.”
Jamie – I finished that in study hall today. It was so easy. The questions were fill in the blank right out of the book. I just read the chapter and answered the questions as I went along. It was so easy. You could have done it.
Mom – I’m going to trust you, Jamie. If you are lying to me, then you will pay the consequences. By the way, I invited your teacher over for dinner tonight. I’m looking forward to talking about what you read today in study hall.Jamie probably didn’t make the wisest choice. Jamie lied to his mother. I wonder what dinner will be like for Jamie.
I want to read something to you. Open your Bibles to Ephesians 5:15-17.
That’s on page ______.
Tonight we are going to focus on those last six words, “The will of the Lord is”
The words, “God’s will,” seem to take on all kinds of different meaning, and bring out different emotions. Sometimes there is fear and uncertainty. Other times there is a indescribably peace and a strength that comes from the comfort of God’.
There’s a new country song out that actually made me cry. I couldn’t help it. It was about a little boy named, “Will”. He was handicapped, and a lady took care of him during the day. She would take him to the park, and they would play. He had a great attitude. It made her realize that if Will could get through the pain that was a part of his life, she could get through the pain that was a part of hers. In the end of the song we learn that Will only has a couple of months left to live, and Will and his mother are leaving to go to California to see a specialist. Will give his babysitter a card that just says, Thank you from Will and God.
That was a really nice play on words, but what is God’s will really? Many people ask the question, “What is God’s will for my life?” How will I know when I have achieved God’s will for my life?
The term “God’s Will” seems to me to be a bit mysterious and unapproachable until we break it down a little bit, and make less scary.
You have a will. You have willpower. “I had to eat that last donut. I just don’t have enough willpower. You got up this morning, because you willed it. You said, “I have to go to school. I will get up, and go.”
Another way to say this is that you have desires. Your teachers and your parents have desires, too. They desire that you get a good education, and that you attend school in order to that. You may not necessarily desire that for yourself, but you accept their desires for you and you go to school.
So lets change the question, “What is God’s desire for my life?” What does God want for me?
#1 – God wants you to have a relationship with Him.
1 Corinthians 1;9 – “God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have everlasting life.”
Jesus Christ died so that this would be possible. He shed His own blood on the cross for you and for me. He loves you that much. You need to hear that, “God loves you. He cares about you and he has a wonderful plan for your life.”
#2 – God wants you to have a good life.
John 10:10 – I came that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
God created you on purpose. He also created you for a purpose. God desires that we worship Him. He desires that we grow to be more like Him.
Philippians 1:6 – “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He desires that we tell others about him. He desires that we have close relationships with eachother, and that we serve eachother
#3 – God wants your desires to be His desires.
Jamie’s mom and his teacher both want Jamie to succeed. They don’t want Jamie to fail and have to go through summer school to catch back up with his friends. Jamie wants to have fun and ‘enjoy life’. He doesn’t want to spend his time doing homework. He’ll do much better in school if he chooses to desire the same thing that his mom desires.
Tom wants to be an awesome drummer someday. When his teacher tells him that he will need to practice several times a week, he’s telling him because he wants Tom to succeed. If Tom chooses not to be obedient to his teacher, then he will only be a mediocre drummer who is capable of keeping a beat with a few little cymbal crashes for emphasis.
We all have choices to make every day. We can be wise or we can be foolish about our choices. When your desires are the same as God’s desires, then you will be making wise choices, unlike our friend, Jamie.
N – Later that afternoon Jamie walked up to his mom in the kitchen, because he knew that he had to make things right.
Jamie – Mom. I have something to tell you. I lied to you earlier. I didn’t do my homework yet, and I forgot it all in my locker. I guess that this means that I will be doing Julie’s chores for the summer, huh.
Mom – Jamie, I know that you lied to me. I’m your mother. It hurt that you didn’t think that you could tell me the truth the first time. I am glad that you were wise enough to come and set things straight. You will have to do some of Julie’s chores this summer, but because of your honesty you’ll only have to do them twice a week. As for your homework, your teacher is bringing over an extra copy of the book and an extra copy of the worksheet. I called her when I realized that you weren’t telling me the truth. She’ll be here in about an hour for dinner.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L stands for Breakout Session Leader -
Have you ever been in a situation like Jamie’s? What did you do? Were you wise?
BSL – Story time. If you can think of a story from your own life, then share it. Let them
Do the same. Wise = Choosing right
What is your will? What is your will for being here tonight? Why are you here? What is it about The Grip that satisfies your will?
BSL – Let them answer how they want. Encourage all of the answers, and really
Encourage the great answers. J
1) Julie rushed home. “Good”, she thought, I beat Mom to the mailbox. Midterm progress reports were out. The failure notice in geometry would definitely not be a big hit. Since the divorce, Julie’s mother had been bugging her to improve her grades. Julie had tried, but Mr. Bradshaw didn’t teach geometry very well. Julie vowed to improve her grades. She knew she could do better. Why upset her mom when the quarter grades don’t count anyway?
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Genesis 12:11-13
2 Kings 6:19-23
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 20:17
Jeremiah 17:9
2) Kim’s parents believed her again when she told them she didn’t know she was an hour late. They trusted her. Kim didn’t think it was her fault that she had to stretch the truth so often. She believed she wouldn’t have to do it at all if her parents weren’t so strict. Her curfew was just too early. All of her friends were allowed to stay out much later. Kim had tried talking to her parents several times, but they didn’t seem to listen.
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 23:25
Proverbs 30:11
Romans 7:11
Romans 7:18-23
Colossians 3:20
BSL – Pick one of the 2 above situations. Have the students in your group look up the
Verses. You may get nothing out of the verse or it may be great. Just have an open talk.
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - Accountability
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life and that you might have it abundantly.
Paraphrase – Jesus came so that I could have a good life.
What is a good life?
A life that fulfills it’s reason for being. Anything short of that, falls short of having a good life. True fulfillment in life comes when we become what we were created to become.
You and I were created in God’s image. That’s exciting. That means that you and I are on a spiritual journey. That’s something that can’t be said about anything else that has ever been created.
We were created to worship God. Worshipping God is a privilege that has been reserved for you and me, people.
When you worship something or someone, you are saying, “You are worthy of my time” “You are worthy of my resources” “You are worth it”
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity show yourself an example of those who believe.
How many of you would agree that adults sometimes have a tendency to look down at young people. ____________________ That’s typically because recklessness, disrespect, apathy, selfishness, and foolishness are usually associated with young people’s behavior.
One of the ways that we show God that He’s worth it, is by listening to what He has to say and doing it.
What are some examples of Speech ____________ Conduct _____________ etc…?
That’s nice that we have an idea of what God wants us to do, but the big question is HOW???????
1) Be with the right people…
Proverbs 13:20 – He who walks with the wise will become wise, but he is the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Does anyone remember the difference between someone who is wise and someone who is a fool?
A wise friend is a good friend – Good friends know the difference between right and wrong. Good friends make good decisions. IT IS ALWAYS EASIER TO DO THE RIGHT THING WHEN YOU ARE WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
A foolish friend is not a good friend – A foolish person also know the difference between right and wrong, and chooses to do the wrong. They aren’t ignorant. They just aren’t interested in doing right regardless of the consequences, and they will drag you down with them.
That brings me to another reason we were created.
We were created to have deep and meaningful relationships with each other.
2) Be accountable
Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another
It’s called accountability.
If I am smart, then I’m going to surround myself with wise friends who will let me know when I am not being wise. They will let me know when I am making bad decisions in my speech, my conduct, my love, my faith, and my purity.
They will hold me to a standard.
-------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Give each person in the group a blank piece of paper and a pen.
Read 1 Timothy 4:12
Now Read it again and each time you come to a description (Speech, Conduct, Love, etc…) have a person write down that word.
If you run out of words, then just do it all again. If you run out of people, then just have some people do two.
Now hand out deflated balloons (one per person)
Have each person roll up their piece of paper and stick it inside the balloon.
Blow up the balloons and tie them off.
Put all the balloons in the middle of the group.
Each person, when it is there turn will take a balloon, pop it, read the paper, and give 2 examples (1 good and 1 bad)
Speech – Good – Thank you, mom….
Bad – You’re a moron….
BSL – Be sure to participate in this exercise with your group.
I have come that you might have life and that you might have it abundantly.
Paraphrase – Jesus came so that I could have a good life.
What is a good life?
A life that fulfills it’s reason for being. Anything short of that, falls short of having a good life. True fulfillment in life comes when we become what we were created to become.
You and I were created in God’s image. That’s exciting. That means that you and I are on a spiritual journey. That’s something that can’t be said about anything else that has ever been created.
We were created to worship God. Worshipping God is a privilege that has been reserved for you and me, people.
When you worship something or someone, you are saying, “You are worthy of my time” “You are worthy of my resources” “You are worth it”
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity show yourself an example of those who believe.
How many of you would agree that adults sometimes have a tendency to look down at young people. ____________________ That’s typically because recklessness, disrespect, apathy, selfishness, and foolishness are usually associated with young people’s behavior.
One of the ways that we show God that He’s worth it, is by listening to what He has to say and doing it.
What are some examples of Speech ____________ Conduct _____________ etc…?
That’s nice that we have an idea of what God wants us to do, but the big question is HOW???????
1) Be with the right people…
Proverbs 13:20 – He who walks with the wise will become wise, but he is the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Does anyone remember the difference between someone who is wise and someone who is a fool?
A wise friend is a good friend – Good friends know the difference between right and wrong. Good friends make good decisions. IT IS ALWAYS EASIER TO DO THE RIGHT THING WHEN YOU ARE WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
A foolish friend is not a good friend – A foolish person also know the difference between right and wrong, and chooses to do the wrong. They aren’t ignorant. They just aren’t interested in doing right regardless of the consequences, and they will drag you down with them.
That brings me to another reason we were created.
We were created to have deep and meaningful relationships with each other.
2) Be accountable
Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another
It’s called accountability.
If I am smart, then I’m going to surround myself with wise friends who will let me know when I am not being wise. They will let me know when I am making bad decisions in my speech, my conduct, my love, my faith, and my purity.
They will hold me to a standard.
-------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Give each person in the group a blank piece of paper and a pen.
Read 1 Timothy 4:12
Now Read it again and each time you come to a description (Speech, Conduct, Love, etc…) have a person write down that word.
If you run out of words, then just do it all again. If you run out of people, then just have some people do two.
Now hand out deflated balloons (one per person)
Have each person roll up their piece of paper and stick it inside the balloon.
Blow up the balloons and tie them off.
Put all the balloons in the middle of the group.
Each person, when it is there turn will take a balloon, pop it, read the paper, and give 2 examples (1 good and 1 bad)
Speech – Good – Thank you, mom….
Bad – You’re a moron….
BSL – Be sure to participate in this exercise with your group.
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - The Real Deal
What type of friend are you?
If you were a company, what would your name be, and what would you do?
Example 1: Mary’s nickel and dime store. I only give people the minimum.
Example 2: Susie’s Sunshine Palace. I try to make everybody happy.
Can you tell the difference between a REAL friend and a FAKE one?
Have them expand on their answers. Compare their answers to what a counterfeit
friend really looks like. 1) The direction of the relationship 2) Self-destructive
behavior. 3) A lack of solid convictions.
What does it mean to love someone?
What does a loving friendship look like?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a good passage to look through. The point is that a true
friend is more interested in you as a person, than they are in your friendship. They
will do what they have to do to help you make wise choices, even if it means
sacrificing your friendship.
If you were a company, what would your name be, and what would you do?
Example 1: Mary’s nickel and dime store. I only give people the minimum.
Example 2: Susie’s Sunshine Palace. I try to make everybody happy.
Can you tell the difference between a REAL friend and a FAKE one?
Have them expand on their answers. Compare their answers to what a counterfeit
friend really looks like. 1) The direction of the relationship 2) Self-destructive
behavior. 3) A lack of solid convictions.
What does it mean to love someone?
What does a loving friendship look like?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a good passage to look through. The point is that a true
friend is more interested in you as a person, than they are in your friendship. They
will do what they have to do to help you make wise choices, even if it means
sacrificing your friendship.
Saturday, March 3, 2007
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - Blue Skies
Three friends were lying in the grass underneath the stars one night, when they began to wonder out loud what they were. The first one said that they were fireflies that were stuck. The second one said that they were dead people looking down on us. The third one said that they were balls of gas burning millions of miles away.
Two boys and a girl were walking to school one day. They were talking to eachother about why the sky was blue.
The first boy said that the sky was blue because the earth is 75% water, water is reflective, and the sunlight bounces off of the water and back to the sky causing it to look blue.
The second boy said that the sky was blue because it was supposed to be.
The girl said that the sky is blue because it isn’t gray. If it were filled with rain and storms, then it wouldn’t be blue.
Who’s right?
How many of you like to watch storms at night. They are pretty awesome right. What happens when it storms? Damage. Things get damaged or destroyed. Lightning is powerful. My friend was in Vegas once where it rains about 2% of the year. He was there during a storm. He could see the desert from his room, and he watched the lightning hit the ground. ‘BAM’ and then sand would fly up from the force of the lightning.
The sky is something beautiful when it’s clear and blue. It’s safe. It’s fun. It has a real positive effect on our attitudes. When the sky is gray, we call it gloomy and depressing. The sky would always be blue if it weren’t for the rain and bad weather.
Proverbs 13:20
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Let me tell you what this is not saying: There are youth ministries in our community who would have you believe that if a person is not a Christian, then you should not hang out with them. The Bible doesn’t teach that. Jesus built relationships with everyone. He did not shun someone because of his or her lifestyle.
This verse raises a few questions:
1) What is a fool?
a. A fool is someone who knows right from wrong and chooses to do the wrong. They simply don’t care about doing right. They aren’t ignorant. They are just uninterested.
2) Are you a fool?
3) Do you hang with fools?
4) Who do I know that’s wise?
Just because you hang around fools, doesn’t mean that you will become a fool. It means that sooner or later something bad will happen to you.
You were created by God to have a great life. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Most people go through life and never really experience it the way that God intended them to. We make bad decisions. We hang with people who make bad decisions.
You might find this interesting:
When I was growing up, surveys said that the top 3 greatest influences in my life were:
1) Spiritual leaders
2) Teachers
3) Parents
That list has changed. Guess whom the top three influences are in your life:
1) Parents
2) Media
3) Friends are the number one influence
Your friends are the most powerful influence in your life. Your friends have more influence over you than anybody, including yourself and even including God.
Do you know why? Because we all have 3 basic HUGE needs –
I want to be loved.
I want to be people to look at me and know that I can do whatever it is.
I want to belong (I want to be accepted)
On the questions that we asked last week, most of you said that acceptance isn’t important to you. Apparently, it is important. It is actually one of the most important things in your life. Just chew on that for a little bit.
Everyone has some goals for what they want their lives to look like. Girls have been planning their marriages since they were 10 and 12 years old. Your future isn’t just about a job. It’s about who will you be. What kind of man will you be? What kind of woman will you be?
Your friendships determine the direction and the quality of your life. Choose your friends wisely.
Two boys and a girl were walking to school one day. They were talking to eachother about why the sky was blue.
The first boy said that the sky was blue because the earth is 75% water, water is reflective, and the sunlight bounces off of the water and back to the sky causing it to look blue.
The second boy said that the sky was blue because it was supposed to be.
The girl said that the sky is blue because it isn’t gray. If it were filled with rain and storms, then it wouldn’t be blue.
Who’s right?
How many of you like to watch storms at night. They are pretty awesome right. What happens when it storms? Damage. Things get damaged or destroyed. Lightning is powerful. My friend was in Vegas once where it rains about 2% of the year. He was there during a storm. He could see the desert from his room, and he watched the lightning hit the ground. ‘BAM’ and then sand would fly up from the force of the lightning.
The sky is something beautiful when it’s clear and blue. It’s safe. It’s fun. It has a real positive effect on our attitudes. When the sky is gray, we call it gloomy and depressing. The sky would always be blue if it weren’t for the rain and bad weather.
Proverbs 13:20
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Let me tell you what this is not saying: There are youth ministries in our community who would have you believe that if a person is not a Christian, then you should not hang out with them. The Bible doesn’t teach that. Jesus built relationships with everyone. He did not shun someone because of his or her lifestyle.
This verse raises a few questions:
1) What is a fool?
a. A fool is someone who knows right from wrong and chooses to do the wrong. They simply don’t care about doing right. They aren’t ignorant. They are just uninterested.
2) Are you a fool?
3) Do you hang with fools?
4) Who do I know that’s wise?
Just because you hang around fools, doesn’t mean that you will become a fool. It means that sooner or later something bad will happen to you.
You were created by God to have a great life. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Most people go through life and never really experience it the way that God intended them to. We make bad decisions. We hang with people who make bad decisions.
You might find this interesting:
When I was growing up, surveys said that the top 3 greatest influences in my life were:
1) Spiritual leaders
2) Teachers
3) Parents
That list has changed. Guess whom the top three influences are in your life:
1) Parents
2) Media
3) Friends are the number one influence
Your friends are the most powerful influence in your life. Your friends have more influence over you than anybody, including yourself and even including God.
Do you know why? Because we all have 3 basic HUGE needs –
I want to be loved.
I want to be people to look at me and know that I can do whatever it is.
I want to belong (I want to be accepted)
On the questions that we asked last week, most of you said that acceptance isn’t important to you. Apparently, it is important. It is actually one of the most important things in your life. Just chew on that for a little bit.
Everyone has some goals for what they want their lives to look like. Girls have been planning their marriages since they were 10 and 12 years old. Your future isn’t just about a job. It’s about who will you be. What kind of man will you be? What kind of woman will you be?
Your friendships determine the direction and the quality of your life. Choose your friends wisely.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Sexual Purity
Two birds were singing in an oak tree one Sunday morning. It was about 3am. Most people were sound asleep, and they couldn’t hear the birds, but there were 2 people who heard the birds loud and clear. They knew that the birds chirping meant that the morning had arrived, and their parents would realize that they weren’t at home in their beds where they were supposed to be. Jimmy started the car and drove Liz home.
They were both a little embarrassed by the night before. Liz had never been in that situation before. She was 15years old, and she wasn’t sure what to think about what had happened. She had liked Jimmy for about a year. Finally, Jimmy asked her out. They went to the movie theater, but she doesn’t remember what the movie was. She doesn’t even remember watching. She was too busy with Jimmy to know what was going on around her. It was obvious that Jimmy hadn’t intended on watching the movie. She wondered why he agreed to watch a chick-flick with her. On their way home, Jimmy pulled over and parked the car in an obscure out of the way parking lot. He laid out a blanket on the grass, and pulled out some sandwiches and Dr. Pepper. They laid down on the blanket and looked up at the stars for at least an hour. But that hour wasn’t just spent watching the stars in the sky. Everything had happened so fast. The next thing she knew the birds were chirping.
Jimmy was just doing what his friends told him he should do on the date to make it really romantic and meaningful. She’ll love it, and so will you… He had never been in that situation before either.
When Liz got home, she snuck through the front door and up to her bedroom to crawl into bed. She felt a body in her bed, and it made her jump. Then the body spoke, “Liz, what time is it?” It was her mom.
What happened that night between Liz and Jimmy? Why were they embarrassed? What will it be like when they see each other at school on Monday? How will Liz answer her mom’s questions? What is sexual purity and why is it important?
Purity paves the way for Intimacy. The greater your level of purity, the greater the level of real intimacy that you will be able to experience with your future husband or wife.
Sex isn’t something that’s talked about in settings like this often. It’s something that people talk about quite frequently in other settings though. Chat rooms are full of sexual innuendos, and slighted solicitations for sex. There are websites whose sole purpose is to rate how sexable people are. Many people want to be sexually appealing to other people. Who would you ‘do’ it you had the chance?
The sex that is communicated most often in our society is a past-time. It’s a lifestyle. It’s the way that we are supposed to be. It’s just what we do. The term ‘friends with benefits’ has become common and accepted as a lifestyle. Some of us set up boundaries for how far we will go, but we base those boundaries on what is comfortable for us, and what we think is ok and what we think is not ok. We know the consequences of premarital sex, but we dismiss them.
I have prepared a questionnaire for you to respond to and discuss in your Breakout Sessions. Be honest with your answers.
They were both a little embarrassed by the night before. Liz had never been in that situation before. She was 15years old, and she wasn’t sure what to think about what had happened. She had liked Jimmy for about a year. Finally, Jimmy asked her out. They went to the movie theater, but she doesn’t remember what the movie was. She doesn’t even remember watching. She was too busy with Jimmy to know what was going on around her. It was obvious that Jimmy hadn’t intended on watching the movie. She wondered why he agreed to watch a chick-flick with her. On their way home, Jimmy pulled over and parked the car in an obscure out of the way parking lot. He laid out a blanket on the grass, and pulled out some sandwiches and Dr. Pepper. They laid down on the blanket and looked up at the stars for at least an hour. But that hour wasn’t just spent watching the stars in the sky. Everything had happened so fast. The next thing she knew the birds were chirping.
Jimmy was just doing what his friends told him he should do on the date to make it really romantic and meaningful. She’ll love it, and so will you… He had never been in that situation before either.
When Liz got home, she snuck through the front door and up to her bedroom to crawl into bed. She felt a body in her bed, and it made her jump. Then the body spoke, “Liz, what time is it?” It was her mom.
What happened that night between Liz and Jimmy? Why were they embarrassed? What will it be like when they see each other at school on Monday? How will Liz answer her mom’s questions? What is sexual purity and why is it important?
Purity paves the way for Intimacy. The greater your level of purity, the greater the level of real intimacy that you will be able to experience with your future husband or wife.
Sex isn’t something that’s talked about in settings like this often. It’s something that people talk about quite frequently in other settings though. Chat rooms are full of sexual innuendos, and slighted solicitations for sex. There are websites whose sole purpose is to rate how sexable people are. Many people want to be sexually appealing to other people. Who would you ‘do’ it you had the chance?
The sex that is communicated most often in our society is a past-time. It’s a lifestyle. It’s the way that we are supposed to be. It’s just what we do. The term ‘friends with benefits’ has become common and accepted as a lifestyle. Some of us set up boundaries for how far we will go, but we base those boundaries on what is comfortable for us, and what we think is ok and what we think is not ok. We know the consequences of premarital sex, but we dismiss them.
I have prepared a questionnaire for you to respond to and discuss in your Breakout Sessions. Be honest with your answers.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Sexual Purity (Teen Questionaire)
Define Sexual Purity in your own words (what does it mean to be sexually pure?)
Does sexual purity matter? What’s the big deal with remaining sexually pure?
What is a virgin?
Is it reasonable to expect us to remain virgins until we are married?
How do you respond to these quotes?
Educators who tell teenagers that sex is just part of growing up and that it can be a "loving and learning" experience outside of marriage don't understand that men and women are created by God "in His image" and are not the result of an amoral, animalistic, evolutionary process. God teaches that sex outside of marriage is wrong and that there will be consequences for such actions."(John Ankerberg & John Weldon, The Myth of Safe Sex)
RESPONSE-
"Purity doesn't happen by accident; it requires obedience to God. But this obedience is not burdensome or overbearing. Impurity is a grimy film that coats the soul, a shadow that blocks light and darkens our countenance. Without purity, God's gift of sexuality becomes a destruction game. A relationship devoid of purity is soon reduced to nothing more than two bodies grasping at and demanding pleasure. Without purity, the mind becomes a slave to depravity, tossed about by every sinful craving and imagination."(Joshua Harris ... I Kissed Dating Goodbye (A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationships)
RESPONSE-
Our society is starving for intimacy. And many of the lies we believe in our culture have to do with our hunger for relationship. We want acceptance, loving relationships and deep intimacy, and yet we believe the lie that sex will satisfy our hunger. It's true that we are profoundly sexual beings, but it's time to examine some of the lies we feast on: the lie that premarital sex is one of our unalienable rights, the lie that sexual intercourse is the route to intimacy, and the lie that premarital abstinence is obsolete at best and repressive at worst.
RESPONSE-
Does sexual purity matter? What’s the big deal with remaining sexually pure?
What is a virgin?
Is it reasonable to expect us to remain virgins until we are married?
How do you respond to these quotes?
Educators who tell teenagers that sex is just part of growing up and that it can be a "loving and learning" experience outside of marriage don't understand that men and women are created by God "in His image" and are not the result of an amoral, animalistic, evolutionary process. God teaches that sex outside of marriage is wrong and that there will be consequences for such actions."(John Ankerberg & John Weldon, The Myth of Safe Sex)
RESPONSE-
"Purity doesn't happen by accident; it requires obedience to God. But this obedience is not burdensome or overbearing. Impurity is a grimy film that coats the soul, a shadow that blocks light and darkens our countenance. Without purity, God's gift of sexuality becomes a destruction game. A relationship devoid of purity is soon reduced to nothing more than two bodies grasping at and demanding pleasure. Without purity, the mind becomes a slave to depravity, tossed about by every sinful craving and imagination."(Joshua Harris ... I Kissed Dating Goodbye (A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationships)
RESPONSE-
Our society is starving for intimacy. And many of the lies we believe in our culture have to do with our hunger for relationship. We want acceptance, loving relationships and deep intimacy, and yet we believe the lie that sex will satisfy our hunger. It's true that we are profoundly sexual beings, but it's time to examine some of the lies we feast on: the lie that premarital sex is one of our unalienable rights, the lie that sexual intercourse is the route to intimacy, and the lie that premarital abstinence is obsolete at best and repressive at worst.
RESPONSE-
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 4)
I don’t want to be funny tonight. I want to be serious. I want to share something from my heart to your heart.
When we started on this topic of our thought life the focus really was supposed to be on sex, and how it impacts our thoughts and our purity.
We ended up somewhere a little more different. It was a place that was a little bit more scary and more intense and full of honesty.
I have these questionnaires that you guys filled out last week. Some of you were bold enough to hand these in. This was an anonymous exercise. Your anonymity is safe. Some of you didn’t hand yours in, and that’s completely ok.
I read through the ones that I received. It really hurt my heart to read the things that are on your minds. I really hurt for you. I was still thinking about everything the next day as I was driving into work, and I felt emotionally overwhelmed by what you guys carry around with you everyday.
Then I thought about those of you who didn’t turn yours in. Either you didn’t know that you could turn them in or you were too embarrassed to turn them in.
I need everyone to know that The Grip is not a place of shame. The Grip is a place that you can find relief from your shame. You are free to just BE here.
This is why: We have a desire to reflect Jesus Christ here, and that’s what he’s like.
If you read about His time here in the New Testament of the Bible you will see very quickly that He was not about making people feel bad about themselves.
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
The papers that I read this week weren’t that. They were filled with despair and hopelessness and confusion. Jesus came that we would have a good life
1 Peter 5:7
Cast your cares upon Him for He cares for you
How do I know that?
Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down His life for His friends
John 3:16
Knowing the mind of God – having the Spirit of God
When we started on this topic of our thought life the focus really was supposed to be on sex, and how it impacts our thoughts and our purity.
We ended up somewhere a little more different. It was a place that was a little bit more scary and more intense and full of honesty.
I have these questionnaires that you guys filled out last week. Some of you were bold enough to hand these in. This was an anonymous exercise. Your anonymity is safe. Some of you didn’t hand yours in, and that’s completely ok.
I read through the ones that I received. It really hurt my heart to read the things that are on your minds. I really hurt for you. I was still thinking about everything the next day as I was driving into work, and I felt emotionally overwhelmed by what you guys carry around with you everyday.
Then I thought about those of you who didn’t turn yours in. Either you didn’t know that you could turn them in or you were too embarrassed to turn them in.
I need everyone to know that The Grip is not a place of shame. The Grip is a place that you can find relief from your shame. You are free to just BE here.
This is why: We have a desire to reflect Jesus Christ here, and that’s what he’s like.
If you read about His time here in the New Testament of the Bible you will see very quickly that He was not about making people feel bad about themselves.
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
The papers that I read this week weren’t that. They were filled with despair and hopelessness and confusion. Jesus came that we would have a good life
1 Peter 5:7
Cast your cares upon Him for He cares for you
How do I know that?
Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down His life for His friends
John 3:16
Knowing the mind of God – having the Spirit of God
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 3)
Maximum Purity = Maximum Intimacy
What do you think of when I say, Intimate?
I’m talking about closeness. It is an absence of barriers or walls in a relationship. When you have impurity in your life, it breeds shame, we don’t want people to get too close when we have something that we don’t want them to know about.
The level of purity that you have in your life will determine the closeness that you will have with others.
As promised, tonight we will be talking about our thought lives…
We are mainly influenced by 3 things: Ourselves (Our own capacity to do wrong), The World (society, culture, etc.), and Satan.
Our focus is on establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries, even in what we think about. So, how do we set limits to the things that we think about? Is that even possible? If so, then how? (Change – Environment, Heart, Mind, Life)
Maximum purity = Maximum Intimacy (How committed to purity are you?)
Scripture Guide:
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
What do you think of when I say, Intimate?
I’m talking about closeness. It is an absence of barriers or walls in a relationship. When you have impurity in your life, it breeds shame, we don’t want people to get too close when we have something that we don’t want them to know about.
The level of purity that you have in your life will determine the closeness that you will have with others.
As promised, tonight we will be talking about our thought lives…
We are mainly influenced by 3 things: Ourselves (Our own capacity to do wrong), The World (society, culture, etc.), and Satan.
Our focus is on establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries, even in what we think about. So, how do we set limits to the things that we think about? Is that even possible? If so, then how? (Change – Environment, Heart, Mind, Life)
Maximum purity = Maximum Intimacy (How committed to purity are you?)
Scripture Guide:
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 2)
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Who knows what B.O. is? B.O. is short for body odor. It is a smell that typically originates in the underarms of a person. It doesn’t have to be smelly armpits to be B.O. It can be a smelly bottom that wasn’t properly cared for.
I want to tell you about 2 people and 1 situation.
1) Smelly Steve. I felt really bad for Steve. I think that he was a Senior when I was a Freshman. He smelled. He never really did his hair. People at school would make fun of him to the point that he had a nickname. Apparently, Steve didn’t mind the smell.
2) Ernst. Ernst was an older man that I worked with a couple of years ago. He would come into work and some days when he would walk by me I would have to hold my breath, and sometimes go to an entirely different area to get away from the smell. Apparently, Ernst didn’t mind the smell.
They must have smelled it, right? How could it be that I would almost gag when he walked by, but He was able to live with the smell all day long? His wife lived with the smell? How? What could be done about that odor?
1) The situation: I was in 6th grade. It was time to go to lunch. Apparently, the teacher smelled or heard something? I still don’t know what exactly happened. Mr. Slaughtervick would not allow us to leave the classroom until someone admitted to creating the smell that he smelled. I really had to go to the bathroom. So I raised my hand? (I had no idea what was going on). He said, “John, are you the one who’s smelling up this room?” I said, “No. I put on my deoderant this morning.” He said,”Most people don’t put deoderant on down there.” I was completely embarrassed, and then he let me go to the bathroom. I don’t think he did ever find out who smelled up the room.
Could I have 2 volunteers:
Walk by me and pretend that I smell and show us how you would react….
Sometimes the things that we think about are nasty. They smell really bad. This talk is about establishing boundaries on what you think about, on what you allow your mind to dwell on. There are certain things that impact what we think about.
Music
TV
DJ’s
Friends
Magazines
Pictures
The Bible is saying that we need to be intentional about what we think about.
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Who knows what B.O. is? B.O. is short for body odor. It is a smell that typically originates in the underarms of a person. It doesn’t have to be smelly armpits to be B.O. It can be a smelly bottom that wasn’t properly cared for.
I want to tell you about 2 people and 1 situation.
1) Smelly Steve. I felt really bad for Steve. I think that he was a Senior when I was a Freshman. He smelled. He never really did his hair. People at school would make fun of him to the point that he had a nickname. Apparently, Steve didn’t mind the smell.
2) Ernst. Ernst was an older man that I worked with a couple of years ago. He would come into work and some days when he would walk by me I would have to hold my breath, and sometimes go to an entirely different area to get away from the smell. Apparently, Ernst didn’t mind the smell.
They must have smelled it, right? How could it be that I would almost gag when he walked by, but He was able to live with the smell all day long? His wife lived with the smell? How? What could be done about that odor?
1) The situation: I was in 6th grade. It was time to go to lunch. Apparently, the teacher smelled or heard something? I still don’t know what exactly happened. Mr. Slaughtervick would not allow us to leave the classroom until someone admitted to creating the smell that he smelled. I really had to go to the bathroom. So I raised my hand? (I had no idea what was going on). He said, “John, are you the one who’s smelling up this room?” I said, “No. I put on my deoderant this morning.” He said,”Most people don’t put deoderant on down there.” I was completely embarrassed, and then he let me go to the bathroom. I don’t think he did ever find out who smelled up the room.
Could I have 2 volunteers:
Walk by me and pretend that I smell and show us how you would react….
Sometimes the things that we think about are nasty. They smell really bad. This talk is about establishing boundaries on what you think about, on what you allow your mind to dwell on. There are certain things that impact what we think about.
Music
TV
DJ’s
Friends
Magazines
Pictures
The Bible is saying that we need to be intentional about what we think about.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 1)
Checkpoint #3 – Moral Boundaries
Principle – Purity paves the way to Intimacy
Critical Question – Are you establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries?
Key passage – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you His Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:18
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Genesis 2:21-24
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Proverbs 28:26
He who trusts himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe
Ephesians 5:15
Be very careful, then, how you live, not as unwise but as wise
Matthew 7:24-27
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.
Proverbs 4:23
Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Sarah and Gretchen were supposed to go to the movies last night, and Gretchen had promised her that she would go with her when she had finished her homework. Gretchen finished up her geometry and was on the way out the door, when her mom stopped her to ask her about the school dance that was coming up in two weeks. Gretchen had told Mike that she would go with him to the school dance. (Enter Mike – Mike was the most popular guy in school. He had it all together; fast car, nice hair, perfect tan, proportionately muscular). Most of the girls at school were hoping that he would ask them out. Unfortunately for the other girls, Mike didn’t. He asked Gretchen. The problem was that her mom had never met Mike or his parents, and that was a big ‘no-no’. So the conversation went like this:
MOM: Are you going with Billy to the dance? I like Billy. He’s a good boy. You should bring him around more often.
GRETCHEN: No. I’m not going with Billy. I’m going with Mike.
MOM: Wait a minute. Who’s Mike? I don’t think I know Mike? Have I ever met Mike?
GRETCHEN: No. You haven’t, but you can trust me. He’s a “good boy”, too. He asked me last week, and I couldn’t say no. He’s the hottest guy in school. Besides, it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. We’re just going to a stupid dance. What’s the big deal?
MOM: The big deal is that you and I had an agreement. You wouldn’t go out with any guys unless I have met him and his parents. That’s important to me.
GRETCHEN: So I guess my life and what I want doesn’t count then does it? Why do you have to make my life so difficult? I’m going to the dance with Mike whether you like it or not.
MOM: No you aren’t. If that’s your attitude, then you’re not going at all. You can stay home, and if Mike still wants to be with you, then he can come over here for dinner. I will not tolerate that tone of voice, either. It’s disrespectful and inappropriate. So, you can call your friend, Sarah, and let her know that she will be on her own tonight.
Gretchen looked at her mom, and thought to herself, “I hate you.”
How many of you have ever had a situation like that in your house? How many of you have ever thought something like that about your mom or dad?
It had been raining for hours, and my brother and I were working with my grandfather one summer in Florida. We were laying grass around a pond on his property. One section of grass weighs about 5lbs. I loaded my wheelbarrow up to the point that my wheel went flat. I picked up the handles and began to push the wheelbarrow around the pond through the mud. I got about 50ft, and I was in pain. I had messed up my back (14 yrs old and I had a bad back already). I spent the rest of the summer laying on my back with hot pads and soaking in the bathtub. Meanwhile, my brother continued working for my grandpa throughout the rest of the summer. When we got back to my home in Michigan, my grandpa paid us for the work that we had done. He gave my brother $1000 and he gave me $500. I took it and said, “Thanks”, but inside I was a little ball of rage just waiting to explode. I got up to my room as fast as I could, and I let loose (quietly). I can tell you that loosing it quietly looks ridiculous. Loosing it loudly looks equally ridiculous. I was so mad that tears were coming down my face. It wasn’t fair. You’re my grandpa, how can you give him twice as much as me? In that moment, I hated him for it.
I don’t think that he ever knew about it, but I sure did. Guess who else did? God did. God saw everything that I was doing “quietly”. He heard every thought that I was thinking.
Our thoughts are so hugely important to God. What you think about is just as important as what you actually say and do. We fantasize about different things. We create alternate realities that we can escape to when real life feels like it’s getting too tough.
Psalm 94:11 says “The Lord knows the thoughts of man”
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
Last year when we talked about having moral boundaries, we focused on your relationships with the opposite sex. What are you going to do when he or she wants a kiss, how about when they want a little bit more? How about when you want a little bit more? Have you established boundaries to help you remain pure? That was mainly focused on staying pure physically. These next few weeks we are going to discover what it means to establish moral boundaries in your thought life. We’ll talk about that secret place in your head that no one else knows about, only you and God. Sometimes we think about things and dwell on things that mess up our mind so bad. I think that this is going to be an extremely important discussion for you to be a part of. You never know what you might take away. It may just change your life.
------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Have you ever experienced “hate” thoughts toward anybody? What was the situation that led up to that?
Have you ever done anything wrong that noone else knew about, only you? What could have the consequences have been? Is it possible that anyone was hurt by what you did? Are our thoughts that no one knows about have the ability to cause damage even if no one knows about them?
Bad thoughts towards others act as a barrier to a relationship with that other person. They also cause stress for you. Not to mention that we are told to ‘love others’.
What are some ‘secret thoughts’ that teens have that may not be considered good thoughts?
What does your thought life have to do with moral boundaries?
Principle – Purity paves the way to Intimacy
Critical Question – Are you establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries?
Key passage – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you His Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:18
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Genesis 2:21-24
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Proverbs 28:26
He who trusts himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe
Ephesians 5:15
Be very careful, then, how you live, not as unwise but as wise
Matthew 7:24-27
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.
Proverbs 4:23
Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Sarah and Gretchen were supposed to go to the movies last night, and Gretchen had promised her that she would go with her when she had finished her homework. Gretchen finished up her geometry and was on the way out the door, when her mom stopped her to ask her about the school dance that was coming up in two weeks. Gretchen had told Mike that she would go with him to the school dance. (Enter Mike – Mike was the most popular guy in school. He had it all together; fast car, nice hair, perfect tan, proportionately muscular). Most of the girls at school were hoping that he would ask them out. Unfortunately for the other girls, Mike didn’t. He asked Gretchen. The problem was that her mom had never met Mike or his parents, and that was a big ‘no-no’. So the conversation went like this:
MOM: Are you going with Billy to the dance? I like Billy. He’s a good boy. You should bring him around more often.
GRETCHEN: No. I’m not going with Billy. I’m going with Mike.
MOM: Wait a minute. Who’s Mike? I don’t think I know Mike? Have I ever met Mike?
GRETCHEN: No. You haven’t, but you can trust me. He’s a “good boy”, too. He asked me last week, and I couldn’t say no. He’s the hottest guy in school. Besides, it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. We’re just going to a stupid dance. What’s the big deal?
MOM: The big deal is that you and I had an agreement. You wouldn’t go out with any guys unless I have met him and his parents. That’s important to me.
GRETCHEN: So I guess my life and what I want doesn’t count then does it? Why do you have to make my life so difficult? I’m going to the dance with Mike whether you like it or not.
MOM: No you aren’t. If that’s your attitude, then you’re not going at all. You can stay home, and if Mike still wants to be with you, then he can come over here for dinner. I will not tolerate that tone of voice, either. It’s disrespectful and inappropriate. So, you can call your friend, Sarah, and let her know that she will be on her own tonight.
Gretchen looked at her mom, and thought to herself, “I hate you.”
How many of you have ever had a situation like that in your house? How many of you have ever thought something like that about your mom or dad?
It had been raining for hours, and my brother and I were working with my grandfather one summer in Florida. We were laying grass around a pond on his property. One section of grass weighs about 5lbs. I loaded my wheelbarrow up to the point that my wheel went flat. I picked up the handles and began to push the wheelbarrow around the pond through the mud. I got about 50ft, and I was in pain. I had messed up my back (14 yrs old and I had a bad back already). I spent the rest of the summer laying on my back with hot pads and soaking in the bathtub. Meanwhile, my brother continued working for my grandpa throughout the rest of the summer. When we got back to my home in Michigan, my grandpa paid us for the work that we had done. He gave my brother $1000 and he gave me $500. I took it and said, “Thanks”, but inside I was a little ball of rage just waiting to explode. I got up to my room as fast as I could, and I let loose (quietly). I can tell you that loosing it quietly looks ridiculous. Loosing it loudly looks equally ridiculous. I was so mad that tears were coming down my face. It wasn’t fair. You’re my grandpa, how can you give him twice as much as me? In that moment, I hated him for it.
I don’t think that he ever knew about it, but I sure did. Guess who else did? God did. God saw everything that I was doing “quietly”. He heard every thought that I was thinking.
Our thoughts are so hugely important to God. What you think about is just as important as what you actually say and do. We fantasize about different things. We create alternate realities that we can escape to when real life feels like it’s getting too tough.
Psalm 94:11 says “The Lord knows the thoughts of man”
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
Last year when we talked about having moral boundaries, we focused on your relationships with the opposite sex. What are you going to do when he or she wants a kiss, how about when they want a little bit more? How about when you want a little bit more? Have you established boundaries to help you remain pure? That was mainly focused on staying pure physically. These next few weeks we are going to discover what it means to establish moral boundaries in your thought life. We’ll talk about that secret place in your head that no one else knows about, only you and God. Sometimes we think about things and dwell on things that mess up our mind so bad. I think that this is going to be an extremely important discussion for you to be a part of. You never know what you might take away. It may just change your life.
------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Have you ever experienced “hate” thoughts toward anybody? What was the situation that led up to that?
Have you ever done anything wrong that noone else knew about, only you? What could have the consequences have been? Is it possible that anyone was hurt by what you did? Are our thoughts that no one knows about have the ability to cause damage even if no one knows about them?
Bad thoughts towards others act as a barrier to a relationship with that other person. They also cause stress for you. Not to mention that we are told to ‘love others’.
What are some ‘secret thoughts’ that teens have that may not be considered good thoughts?
What does your thought life have to do with moral boundaries?
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Sex
Sex is a very good thing. God created sex. Sex was God’s idea. Where do we find out about sex?
Radio Personalities
Magazines
Porn sites
Movies
TV
Friends
Sex Education
Most of you by now think you know a little bit about sex.
Sex can be unbelievably fulfilling (and fun) – (ppt.party favors). Or sex can leave a person feeling used and empty (ppt.flat tire/dirty diaper). Which one do you suppose that God intended?
Where do babies come from (don’t say ‘test tubes’)? Babies come from a man and a woman having sex. I know this is gross, but you wouldn’t be here if your mom and dad didn’t have sex. (mom fade in/dad fade in/baby fade in)
But, God intended sex to be amazing. It is probably the greatest most fulfilling thing that you will ever do.
I want to tell you a story about a dad and his three sons. Their mom was away visiting their sister at college. One night the dad and the boys were all sitting in the living room and talking about mom. Dad made some brownies. The boys loved Dad’s brownies. They were always perfect. They melted in your mouth. The boys couldn’t wait to dig in to the brownies. The dad had something else on his mind, though. His oldest boy had a girlfriend and his other two were reaching that age. It was time for the ‘sex talk’. The boys knew that mom and dad had a great relationship. They were comfortable with eachother. They obviously loved eachother. So their dad simply told them this, “If you want to have as good a relationship with your wife as your mother and I have, then you will wait until you are married to experience sex. Now how about those brownies.” Then he said, “Before you eat them, I need to confess something. When I was mixing the brownies, I carried the bowl outside while I went to get the mail. I tripped and dropped the brownie mix in a fresh pile of doggie doo. But don’t worry, I think I got most of it out.” One by one the boys scooted away from the brownies. Then the dad said, “If you mix your brownie mix with doggy doo, no matter how much, it just won’t be the same as what your mom and I have.”
God designed sex to be an amazing thing for a husband and a wife to experience together for the first time. So why wait? One word – Intimacy (ppt.Intimacy)
Intimacy is the joy of knowing someone completely and being known by that person with no fear of rejection. You don’t have to think about, “what happens in the morning?” If I let this guy touch me, then …
How do I get intimacy? One word – Purity (ppt.Purity)
Maximum purity = Maximum intimacy (ppt.)
Impurity erodes your capacity to experience intimacy, and because of that it
Maximum purity = Maximum intimacy = Maximum sexual satisfaction
Maximum impurity = Minimum intimacy = Minimum sexual satisfaction
Purity paves the way for intimacy
Girls: You don’t really want sex. What you want is intimacy. You want to meet a guy, fall in love, and know that you can trust that person completely. You want to share everything there is to know about you without fear of betrayal or rejection. You want to know that person fully and be fully known. What you are after is intimacy, not sex!
Sex is not just physical; it is relational.
Read Genesis …
When Adam and Eve had sex, they didn’t just ‘have sex’. They became one flesh. There is something mysterious and spiritual about that experience. It’s not something you have any control over. The Bible says, “Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body?”
It is impossible to simply have sex.
When you participate in sex outside of marriage, you forfeit the opportunity to become uniquely one with your future husband or wife.
With every sexual encounter, you decrease the significance of sex with your future partner.
God is not against sex. He created it. He is not against teenagers. He created you, too. God isn’t against you having sex. He just wants you to wait for marriage.
---------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide D.L. stands for Discussion Leader -
When you hear the word “sex”, what do you think of?
DL notes: This is kind of a broad question. When should it happen? When does it happen? Why does it happen?
What are you feeling right now (are you grossed out, are you excited, is it something that you look forward to or is it something that you are afraid of)?
DL notes: Don’t let them get hung up on this one for too long, but you are looking for what their perspective is right now on sex.
How many of you have had conversations with your parents or friends about sex?
DL notes: If the answer is yes, then what did they say (Parents and Friends both). If the answer is no, then why not?
Where do you get your information about what sex is about? (TV, movies, friends, magazines)
DL notes: Try and find out what their impression of sex is from what they hear and observe from these resources.
What do you think sex is about?
DL notes: Another way to ask this question would be: Why have sex? What is so great about sex?
Radio Personalities
Magazines
Porn sites
Movies
TV
Friends
Sex Education
Most of you by now think you know a little bit about sex.
Sex can be unbelievably fulfilling (and fun) – (ppt.party favors). Or sex can leave a person feeling used and empty (ppt.flat tire/dirty diaper). Which one do you suppose that God intended?
Where do babies come from (don’t say ‘test tubes’)? Babies come from a man and a woman having sex. I know this is gross, but you wouldn’t be here if your mom and dad didn’t have sex. (mom fade in/dad fade in/baby fade in)
But, God intended sex to be amazing. It is probably the greatest most fulfilling thing that you will ever do.
I want to tell you a story about a dad and his three sons. Their mom was away visiting their sister at college. One night the dad and the boys were all sitting in the living room and talking about mom. Dad made some brownies. The boys loved Dad’s brownies. They were always perfect. They melted in your mouth. The boys couldn’t wait to dig in to the brownies. The dad had something else on his mind, though. His oldest boy had a girlfriend and his other two were reaching that age. It was time for the ‘sex talk’. The boys knew that mom and dad had a great relationship. They were comfortable with eachother. They obviously loved eachother. So their dad simply told them this, “If you want to have as good a relationship with your wife as your mother and I have, then you will wait until you are married to experience sex. Now how about those brownies.” Then he said, “Before you eat them, I need to confess something. When I was mixing the brownies, I carried the bowl outside while I went to get the mail. I tripped and dropped the brownie mix in a fresh pile of doggie doo. But don’t worry, I think I got most of it out.” One by one the boys scooted away from the brownies. Then the dad said, “If you mix your brownie mix with doggy doo, no matter how much, it just won’t be the same as what your mom and I have.”
God designed sex to be an amazing thing for a husband and a wife to experience together for the first time. So why wait? One word – Intimacy (ppt.Intimacy)
Intimacy is the joy of knowing someone completely and being known by that person with no fear of rejection. You don’t have to think about, “what happens in the morning?” If I let this guy touch me, then …
How do I get intimacy? One word – Purity (ppt.Purity)
Maximum purity = Maximum intimacy (ppt.)
Impurity erodes your capacity to experience intimacy, and because of that it
Maximum purity = Maximum intimacy = Maximum sexual satisfaction
Maximum impurity = Minimum intimacy = Minimum sexual satisfaction
Purity paves the way for intimacy
Girls: You don’t really want sex. What you want is intimacy. You want to meet a guy, fall in love, and know that you can trust that person completely. You want to share everything there is to know about you without fear of betrayal or rejection. You want to know that person fully and be fully known. What you are after is intimacy, not sex!
Sex is not just physical; it is relational.
Read Genesis …
When Adam and Eve had sex, they didn’t just ‘have sex’. They became one flesh. There is something mysterious and spiritual about that experience. It’s not something you have any control over. The Bible says, “Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body?”
It is impossible to simply have sex.
When you participate in sex outside of marriage, you forfeit the opportunity to become uniquely one with your future husband or wife.
With every sexual encounter, you decrease the significance of sex with your future partner.
God is not against sex. He created it. He is not against teenagers. He created you, too. God isn’t against you having sex. He just wants you to wait for marriage.
---------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide D.L. stands for Discussion Leader -
When you hear the word “sex”, what do you think of?
DL notes: This is kind of a broad question. When should it happen? When does it happen? Why does it happen?
What are you feeling right now (are you grossed out, are you excited, is it something that you look forward to or is it something that you are afraid of)?
DL notes: Don’t let them get hung up on this one for too long, but you are looking for what their perspective is right now on sex.
How many of you have had conversations with your parents or friends about sex?
DL notes: If the answer is yes, then what did they say (Parents and Friends both). If the answer is no, then why not?
Where do you get your information about what sex is about? (TV, movies, friends, magazines)
DL notes: Try and find out what their impression of sex is from what they hear and observe from these resources.
What do you think sex is about?
DL notes: Another way to ask this question would be: Why have sex? What is so great about sex?
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - So Who's Right, Anyways?
What is truth?
If you step out of a plane, what direction will you go (up or down)?
Isaac Newton got hit on the head with an apple and discovered the law of gravity which will pull your body down towards the earth.
If I were to hold you by the hands and twirl you around, what would happen if I let go? Would you continue to go around in circles or would you go in a straight line?
The law of centripetal force would force your body to go in a straight line.
If I were to buy a loaf of bread, and let it sit out for a month would you eat it?
The 3rd law of Thermo Dynamics says that everything deteriorates as it ages.
Would you agree with this statement:
What is right for one person in any given situation might not be right for another person? Just because something is wrong for you, doesn’t mean it’s wrong for me.
Do you know anyone who is color blind?
Both of my brothers-in-law are color blind. There are two colors that look the same to him. He sees red and orange as the same, and he sees brown and green as the same.
What color is this (PPT)?
Would I be correct in saying that he is wrong when he calls green, brown or when he calls red, orange?
How about when we are playing a game that requires you to know the difference between the two? In Phase 10, the cards are green, yellow, red, and orange. You have to create a hand of 7 cards of one color. If he lays out 4 red and 3 orange, then would I be correct in telling him that he is wrong? Or, should I let him win?
So what I’m hearing is that there is such a thing as right and wrong? Under no circumstance is brown, green or red, yellow. Bread will always get moldy, you will always fall down.
So then what you are saying is that there is absolute truth. It doesn’t matter what you believe to be true. What matters is what is true. What do you think?
What kind of instrument is in that case. (guitar)
What does it look like? Describe it.
What color is it? How many sound holes does it have? How many strings does it have? What color are the strings?
Let’s see if you are right –
Let’s sing God Bless the USA (SHA)
After hearing all of this, how many of you would be willing to say that there is a such thing as right and wrong? You may think that to be a trick question, because what I am really getting at is making choices.
How about Hitler? Was what Hitler did wrong? How about Saddam Hussein? How about Ossama Bin Laden?
Why?
When Jesus was asked, “What is the greatest commandment?”
He answered
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. And the second is like it – Love your neighbor as yourself
These men devalued Human Life. Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself” The Old Testament says, “Do not commit murder” God created life and then told us what to do with it, and what not to do with it. That is why what they did was wrong.
Everything else is a consequence of the choices they made. The result is not what makes something right or wrong.
You have to make decisions all the time. You have to make decisions about drugs whether is pot, vicatin, ridlin, cocaine, extasy, or beer. Someone will ask you if you want some, and you will have to make a decision. You will have to make decisions about sex and about touching. Whether it’s holding hands, kissing, petting, or sex. You will be in the moment when you will want to, and you will have to make a decision.
The first verse that I ever learned was Psalm 119:9
How will a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to your word.
You have to set up limits. You need to know now what you will do. The best place to start to make those decisions is right here (the Bible).
Here’s what the Bible says
I warn you that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Against such things, there is no law
You have to make a decision. What do you want your life to look like?
If you step out of a plane, what direction will you go (up or down)?
Isaac Newton got hit on the head with an apple and discovered the law of gravity which will pull your body down towards the earth.
If I were to hold you by the hands and twirl you around, what would happen if I let go? Would you continue to go around in circles or would you go in a straight line?
The law of centripetal force would force your body to go in a straight line.
If I were to buy a loaf of bread, and let it sit out for a month would you eat it?
The 3rd law of Thermo Dynamics says that everything deteriorates as it ages.
Would you agree with this statement:
What is right for one person in any given situation might not be right for another person? Just because something is wrong for you, doesn’t mean it’s wrong for me.
Do you know anyone who is color blind?
Both of my brothers-in-law are color blind. There are two colors that look the same to him. He sees red and orange as the same, and he sees brown and green as the same.
What color is this (PPT)?
Would I be correct in saying that he is wrong when he calls green, brown or when he calls red, orange?
How about when we are playing a game that requires you to know the difference between the two? In Phase 10, the cards are green, yellow, red, and orange. You have to create a hand of 7 cards of one color. If he lays out 4 red and 3 orange, then would I be correct in telling him that he is wrong? Or, should I let him win?
So what I’m hearing is that there is such a thing as right and wrong? Under no circumstance is brown, green or red, yellow. Bread will always get moldy, you will always fall down.
So then what you are saying is that there is absolute truth. It doesn’t matter what you believe to be true. What matters is what is true. What do you think?
What kind of instrument is in that case. (guitar)
What does it look like? Describe it.
What color is it? How many sound holes does it have? How many strings does it have? What color are the strings?
Let’s see if you are right –
Let’s sing God Bless the USA (SHA)
After hearing all of this, how many of you would be willing to say that there is a such thing as right and wrong? You may think that to be a trick question, because what I am really getting at is making choices.
How about Hitler? Was what Hitler did wrong? How about Saddam Hussein? How about Ossama Bin Laden?
Why?
When Jesus was asked, “What is the greatest commandment?”
He answered
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. And the second is like it – Love your neighbor as yourself
These men devalued Human Life. Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself” The Old Testament says, “Do not commit murder” God created life and then told us what to do with it, and what not to do with it. That is why what they did was wrong.
Everything else is a consequence of the choices they made. The result is not what makes something right or wrong.
You have to make decisions all the time. You have to make decisions about drugs whether is pot, vicatin, ridlin, cocaine, extasy, or beer. Someone will ask you if you want some, and you will have to make a decision. You will have to make decisions about sex and about touching. Whether it’s holding hands, kissing, petting, or sex. You will be in the moment when you will want to, and you will have to make a decision.
The first verse that I ever learned was Psalm 119:9
How will a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to your word.
You have to set up limits. You need to know now what you will do. The best place to start to make those decisions is right here (the Bible).
Here’s what the Bible says
I warn you that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Against such things, there is no law
You have to make a decision. What do you want your life to look like?
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Physical Intimacy Questions
***What do you think***
Is physical intimacy ever ok?
When would physical intimacy not be ok?
How far is too far?
How far do you think you would go?
What is intimacy?
What is purity?
Is purity important (why or why not)?
Is physical intimacy ever ok?
When would physical intimacy not be ok?
How far is too far?
How far do you think you would go?
What is intimacy?
What is purity?
Is purity important (why or why not)?
7 Checkpoints: Spiritual Disciplines - Talking to the Big Guy
II. Skits: 3 groups
Here are the situations:
1. Your cat or dog comes hobbling home after being run over by a car. It’s still alive, but barely.
2. Your relative, who you are very close with, dies suddenly.
3. You are about to take the test that determines whether or not you get to go on to the next grade with all of your friends.
Here are your instructions:
As a group, figure out the story background.
Scene 1: You are going to act out the moment you find out. (You and whoever)
Scene 2: You are going to act out a prayer. (You and God)
Scene 3: You are going to act out a conversation with your best friend. (You and best friend)
III. The cat story – I would never do that again
IV. Bop
Like most people, I have two Grandpas. How many of you have special names for your Grandparents? We called my dad’s parents, Nana and Bop. My senior year of high school Bop died. I was competing in the regional track meet, and had just run the fastest 800 meters that I had ever run (1:56 for those who are curious). I came in 3rd place which qualified me to run in the State track meet. I was in a great mood. Typically, after a large track meet like that, I would go over to my girlfriend’s house to say, “Hi” before I went home. Her dad met me at the door, and said, “I’m sorry”. I thought, “Are you nuts, I just ran the best race of my life today.” That’s when he realized that I didn’t know. He said, “Your grandpa passed away today.” I got in my car, and drove home. I don’t remember talking to anyone about it. I didn’t cry once. Almost one month later, I was sitting at the kitchen table with a friend, and the thought of Bop crossed my mind, and I bawled my eyes out. My friend was there for me during that time. We talked about it a little bit, but guess who I wanted to talk to -
I talked to God about it. I asked Him why, and then I just cried. My Bop’s death wasn’t a surprise to God, but it was Bop’s time, and God knew that it would hurt me. It’s like when your mom or dad would take you in for your shot as a baby, and they knew that it would hurt and that you would cry. When it was all over, they pick you up and hold you close and comfort you.
When I have questions, or I just need to vent, cry, yell, or just talk about something.
I don’t have to talk to anyone else, except for God. There is one mediator between God and man, Jesus. And guess who Jesus is, He’s God. I can talk directly to Him, the creator of this world, the creator of me, my Savior. My relationship with God is so much a part of my life, that you will know that after knowing me for a little while. I talk about Him. He’s so much a part of my life, that when I talk about my life with someone, eventually, we’ll be talking about God.
God is the creator of everything you see, and He lets me talk to Him whenever I want and about whatever I want. He not only lets me talk to Him, He wants me to talk to Him.
Prayer is talking with God just like you talk to your best friend about stuff. Do you have a relationship with Jesus (God)? It’s hard to talk to someone when you don’t have a relationship with them. Someone asked me last week, if I would talk about how to begin a relationship with Jesus.
Romans 3:23 says – For all have sinned and continue to fall short of the glory of God.
That means that, You aren’t perfect. I’m not perfect. God is perfect, and He requires perfection from us. Be holy for I am holy.
Romans 6:23 says – …The wages of sin is death, an eternal separation from God
Outside of perfection, it is impossible to have a relationship with Him, impossible for us.
Romans 6:23 continues – But the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ.
We are saved from death to life, an eternal relationship with Jesus, based on the merit of Jesus Christ alone.
God came to Earth in the form of a man, Jesus (Christmas). He lived a perfect life. He was put to death and paid the price for our sins (Good Friday). He was buried and then He rose again (Easter).
You don’t get to Heaven based on any good thing that you’ve done or will do. The price has been paid in full by Jesus. It’s a gift that God offers to you. All you have to do is take it. You put your faith and trust in Jesus alone.
Admit that you are a sinner – you do wrong things – you aren’t perfect.
Believe that Jesus is God, and that he paid the price for your sin.
Begin your relationship with God by
Accepting the gift as payment for your sins.
Ephesians 2:8,9
It is by grace that you are saved, and not of works that no one should boast.
You can do all that just by talking to God.
Repeat after me (you can do it out load or silently)
I admit that I’m a sinner, and because of that I can’t get into Heaven or have a relationship with. I believe that Jesus is God, and that He paid the price for my sin. I accept that gift as payment for my sins.
Thank you for saving me from an eternity separated from You.
Here are the situations:
1. Your cat or dog comes hobbling home after being run over by a car. It’s still alive, but barely.
2. Your relative, who you are very close with, dies suddenly.
3. You are about to take the test that determines whether or not you get to go on to the next grade with all of your friends.
Here are your instructions:
As a group, figure out the story background.
Scene 1: You are going to act out the moment you find out. (You and whoever)
Scene 2: You are going to act out a prayer. (You and God)
Scene 3: You are going to act out a conversation with your best friend. (You and best friend)
III. The cat story – I would never do that again
IV. Bop
Like most people, I have two Grandpas. How many of you have special names for your Grandparents? We called my dad’s parents, Nana and Bop. My senior year of high school Bop died. I was competing in the regional track meet, and had just run the fastest 800 meters that I had ever run (1:56 for those who are curious). I came in 3rd place which qualified me to run in the State track meet. I was in a great mood. Typically, after a large track meet like that, I would go over to my girlfriend’s house to say, “Hi” before I went home. Her dad met me at the door, and said, “I’m sorry”. I thought, “Are you nuts, I just ran the best race of my life today.” That’s when he realized that I didn’t know. He said, “Your grandpa passed away today.” I got in my car, and drove home. I don’t remember talking to anyone about it. I didn’t cry once. Almost one month later, I was sitting at the kitchen table with a friend, and the thought of Bop crossed my mind, and I bawled my eyes out. My friend was there for me during that time. We talked about it a little bit, but guess who I wanted to talk to -
I talked to God about it. I asked Him why, and then I just cried. My Bop’s death wasn’t a surprise to God, but it was Bop’s time, and God knew that it would hurt me. It’s like when your mom or dad would take you in for your shot as a baby, and they knew that it would hurt and that you would cry. When it was all over, they pick you up and hold you close and comfort you.
When I have questions, or I just need to vent, cry, yell, or just talk about something.
I don’t have to talk to anyone else, except for God. There is one mediator between God and man, Jesus. And guess who Jesus is, He’s God. I can talk directly to Him, the creator of this world, the creator of me, my Savior. My relationship with God is so much a part of my life, that you will know that after knowing me for a little while. I talk about Him. He’s so much a part of my life, that when I talk about my life with someone, eventually, we’ll be talking about God.
God is the creator of everything you see, and He lets me talk to Him whenever I want and about whatever I want. He not only lets me talk to Him, He wants me to talk to Him.
Prayer is talking with God just like you talk to your best friend about stuff. Do you have a relationship with Jesus (God)? It’s hard to talk to someone when you don’t have a relationship with them. Someone asked me last week, if I would talk about how to begin a relationship with Jesus.
Romans 3:23 says – For all have sinned and continue to fall short of the glory of God.
That means that, You aren’t perfect. I’m not perfect. God is perfect, and He requires perfection from us. Be holy for I am holy.
Romans 6:23 says – …The wages of sin is death, an eternal separation from God
Outside of perfection, it is impossible to have a relationship with Him, impossible for us.
Romans 6:23 continues – But the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ.
We are saved from death to life, an eternal relationship with Jesus, based on the merit of Jesus Christ alone.
God came to Earth in the form of a man, Jesus (Christmas). He lived a perfect life. He was put to death and paid the price for our sins (Good Friday). He was buried and then He rose again (Easter).
You don’t get to Heaven based on any good thing that you’ve done or will do. The price has been paid in full by Jesus. It’s a gift that God offers to you. All you have to do is take it. You put your faith and trust in Jesus alone.
Admit that you are a sinner – you do wrong things – you aren’t perfect.
Believe that Jesus is God, and that he paid the price for your sin.
Begin your relationship with God by
Accepting the gift as payment for your sins.
Ephesians 2:8,9
It is by grace that you are saved, and not of works that no one should boast.
You can do all that just by talking to God.
Repeat after me (you can do it out load or silently)
I admit that I’m a sinner, and because of that I can’t get into Heaven or have a relationship with. I believe that Jesus is God, and that He paid the price for my sin. I accept that gift as payment for my sins.
Thank you for saving me from an eternity separated from You.
7 Checkpoints: Spiritual Disciplines - What Will You Do? How Will You Know?
Spiritual Disciplines (Part 2) – What will you do? How will you Know?
Here’s a true story: (Read the story from the 7 Checkpoints pg 62,63)
You guys have the biggest decisions of life ahead of you.
Who will I marry?
Where will I work?
How will I fit into society?
You also have BIG decisions right now.
Should I obey my parent’s curfew?
Mom and dad won’t mind if I’m a few minutes late.
I’m old enough to be out past 10:00.
Which friends will I hang out with this weekend?
This friend is boring, but safe.
This friend is fun, but dangerous.
What do I want my life to be like?
What will I do if someone offers me drugs at the party?
I see other people here doing it.
I’m young, shouldn’t I experiment a little.
I didn’t know that he did drugs; they must be okay then.
What will happen if my date pressures me for sex?
If I don’t do it, then he’ll think I’m a goody-two-shoes
He wouldn’t ask me if he didn’t love me
If you can begin now to see the way that God sees, then you will be more inclined to do what He says in these decisive moments.
Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. He’s looking for a dolphin, and he comes out of the room waving his hand behind him, saying, “Do Not Go In There”
There is a movie called, Cape Fear. The movie is about a judge and his family being stalked and killed by a man that he had put in jail. Naturally, the guy is a psycho. I remember watching this movie. I was at a friends house and it was dark outside. After watching the movie, I was looking in my back seat the whole way home. When I got home I locked the door, turned off my bedroom light and jumped into my bed where I would be safe, sort of, except for the shadows in the room. That was a disturbing movie. This guy was showing up in all of those placed that you think someone might be when you are scared. You see a quick glimpse of him in the yard. You see his face in the window. You see him in the back seat of the family’s car. You see him in the kitchen. You see him underneath the car. But you know who doesn’t see him there? The family in the movie doesn’t. Every time, he kills someone. I see him in the kitchen, and the maid is going to the kitchen so what do you thinking I’m saying, “Don’t go in there” – In the car “Don’t go in there” I want the family to be able to see what I see so that they won’t get hurt, because I know what’s coming. If they saw the way that I saw, then they would stay out of the kitchen.
That’s just a movie, but this is real life. God sees my life and he knows what’s coming, and it’s as if He’s saying, “Don’t go in there”. If I was seeing the situation the way that He is, then I wouldn’t. But I don’t see the way He sees, and so I do. It results in hurt, shame, broken relationships, broken hearts, and sometimes broken bodies.
A friend of mine from Chicago (he was in Junior High). He got mixed up in a gang. Eventually, he realized that the lifestyle he was living was destroying him and his relationships with his family. The only way that he could get out of that situation was to get violated out (that means that you roll the dice, and what ever number comes up is the number of guys that get to beat you for 30 seconds). He chose to stay in the gang. Today, his life has been torn apart. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Marcello doesn’t have an abundant life, because He chose to see his own way, and not how God sees. He has a life that is surrounded by drugs, by hurt, by pain, because he didn’t want to take a 30 second beating. Who do you hang out with? What does your life look like?
What do you spend your day thinking about? What do you spend your time doing? When you die, how will you be remembered? Will you be a really fun person, or will you be a really fun person who changed his world?
God gave us His word, The Bible, so that we would be able to know what the right way is.
2 Timothy 3:16
All Scripture is God breathed, and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness.
The Bible is literally, the Word of God. They are His words. In order to know what He has to say, you have to read it. (If you don’t have a Bible at home, then take one of ours as a gift to you)
God also gave us Himself. He gives each one of us the opportunity to have a relationship with Him. Jesus said, I have come so that you would have life, and that you would have it abundantly. You can’t have that outside of a relationship with him. No matter how hard you try you will never know life the way it could be without Him in it.
If you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, then don’t let another day go by without it. That’s the first step to having an abundant life. Stop one of us leaders and talk to us, we would love to introduce you to Jesus. The biggest decision that you will ever make is, “What did you do with Christ?”
Here’s a true story: (Read the story from the 7 Checkpoints pg 62,63)
You guys have the biggest decisions of life ahead of you.
Who will I marry?
Where will I work?
How will I fit into society?
You also have BIG decisions right now.
Should I obey my parent’s curfew?
Mom and dad won’t mind if I’m a few minutes late.
I’m old enough to be out past 10:00.
Which friends will I hang out with this weekend?
This friend is boring, but safe.
This friend is fun, but dangerous.
What do I want my life to be like?
What will I do if someone offers me drugs at the party?
I see other people here doing it.
I’m young, shouldn’t I experiment a little.
I didn’t know that he did drugs; they must be okay then.
What will happen if my date pressures me for sex?
If I don’t do it, then he’ll think I’m a goody-two-shoes
He wouldn’t ask me if he didn’t love me
If you can begin now to see the way that God sees, then you will be more inclined to do what He says in these decisive moments.
Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. He’s looking for a dolphin, and he comes out of the room waving his hand behind him, saying, “Do Not Go In There”
There is a movie called, Cape Fear. The movie is about a judge and his family being stalked and killed by a man that he had put in jail. Naturally, the guy is a psycho. I remember watching this movie. I was at a friends house and it was dark outside. After watching the movie, I was looking in my back seat the whole way home. When I got home I locked the door, turned off my bedroom light and jumped into my bed where I would be safe, sort of, except for the shadows in the room. That was a disturbing movie. This guy was showing up in all of those placed that you think someone might be when you are scared. You see a quick glimpse of him in the yard. You see his face in the window. You see him in the back seat of the family’s car. You see him in the kitchen. You see him underneath the car. But you know who doesn’t see him there? The family in the movie doesn’t. Every time, he kills someone. I see him in the kitchen, and the maid is going to the kitchen so what do you thinking I’m saying, “Don’t go in there” – In the car “Don’t go in there” I want the family to be able to see what I see so that they won’t get hurt, because I know what’s coming. If they saw the way that I saw, then they would stay out of the kitchen.
That’s just a movie, but this is real life. God sees my life and he knows what’s coming, and it’s as if He’s saying, “Don’t go in there”. If I was seeing the situation the way that He is, then I wouldn’t. But I don’t see the way He sees, and so I do. It results in hurt, shame, broken relationships, broken hearts, and sometimes broken bodies.
A friend of mine from Chicago (he was in Junior High). He got mixed up in a gang. Eventually, he realized that the lifestyle he was living was destroying him and his relationships with his family. The only way that he could get out of that situation was to get violated out (that means that you roll the dice, and what ever number comes up is the number of guys that get to beat you for 30 seconds). He chose to stay in the gang. Today, his life has been torn apart. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Marcello doesn’t have an abundant life, because He chose to see his own way, and not how God sees. He has a life that is surrounded by drugs, by hurt, by pain, because he didn’t want to take a 30 second beating. Who do you hang out with? What does your life look like?
What do you spend your day thinking about? What do you spend your time doing? When you die, how will you be remembered? Will you be a really fun person, or will you be a really fun person who changed his world?
God gave us His word, The Bible, so that we would be able to know what the right way is.
2 Timothy 3:16
All Scripture is God breathed, and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness.
The Bible is literally, the Word of God. They are His words. In order to know what He has to say, you have to read it. (If you don’t have a Bible at home, then take one of ours as a gift to you)
God also gave us Himself. He gives each one of us the opportunity to have a relationship with Him. Jesus said, I have come so that you would have life, and that you would have it abundantly. You can’t have that outside of a relationship with him. No matter how hard you try you will never know life the way it could be without Him in it.
If you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, then don’t let another day go by without it. That’s the first step to having an abundant life. Stop one of us leaders and talk to us, we would love to introduce you to Jesus. The biggest decision that you will ever make is, “What did you do with Christ?”
7 Checkpoints: Spiritual Disciplines - Perception is Not Reality
Principle: When you see as God sees, you will do as God says
Critical Question: Are you developing a consistent devotional and prayer life
Key Passage: Romans 12:2
§ And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. (NASB)
§ Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing, and perfect will. (NIV)
§ Don’t become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants – what is good, pleasing, and perfect. (God’s Word for Students)
§ Don’t copy the behaviors and customs of this world, but be a new and different person with a fresh newness in all you do and think. Then you will learn from your own experience how His ways will really satisfy you. (TLB)
There were two boys who were walking down an old dirt road. It was a hot day. They had just come from Mrs. Smith’s bakery in town. One boy bought a slice of apple pie. The other boy just wanted an apple. Mrs. Smith had a tradition of always giving an apple to anyone who would buy a piece of pie. This was an excellent deal. While they were walking, the boy with the apple pulled it out of his pocket, and was just about to take a bite out of the apple when he noticed something that just wasn’t right. There were two little eyes staring up at him. They were attached to a long, thin, slimy, brown body that had buried itself inside the apple. It was a worm. Now the boy had a decision to make. The worm didn’t look like it would taste all that great even though he has seen people eat worms before. His friend saw the worm in the apple and immediately threw his piece of pie out.
Years ago, Columbus was going to sail around the world and end up in the Indian Islands. They knew that it was way too dangerous to go down around the bottom of Africa, because more than likely their ships would be destroyed going around Cape Hope. They had seen it happen and they needed a safer way to go. Somehow, Columbus found out that the world was round. He believed it enough that he put his own life and the lives of many other men on the line. The perspective or belief up to that point was that you could only sail so far, and then you would fall off the edge of the world. Columbus’ perspective was right on. However, when they landed, they thought that they had landed in the West Indies. So, when Columbus saw the people where he landed, he called them Indians. It didn’t matter how much Columbus wanted to believe that he had landed in the Indian Islands. He was wrong. His perception was wrong. Because of that, this place is called America, named after Amerigo Vespucci. He wasn’t the first to come to America. He was the first to realize that he wasn’t in the Indian Islands.
That’s all nice, but what does that have to do with Real Life? How fast does a plane fly? ___________________It doesn’t look like it’s moving that fast. Are you sure? How do you know?
If someone didn’t believe that gravity was real, how long do you think it would take them to change the way they think if you pushed them out of an airplane going 180 mph?
Why did the boy throw his apple pie away without eating it? He figured that if there was a worm in his friend’s apple, then there was probably a worm in one of the apples used to make his apple pie. Chances are that the apple pie was not worm infested, but the boy didn’t want to take that chance.
Perception is not reality. Reality is reality. There is only one perspective that actually is reality, and that is God’s perspective. Why? Because he is the only one who knows what’s going on. Several years ago, I opened up my Bible to Genesis chapter one (31 verses). That’s the place where it talks about God creating everything. I went on to circle every time that it said someone did something. Every time the someone that did something was God. Do you know why? It’s because, there was no one else there. If you made a potato gun, and I walked over and said, “Oh, what’s down there and looked down the barrel”. You would say, “Don’t put your head in front of the barrel. You are going to get hurt.” What would you do if you saw your baby sister or brother looking down the barrel of a real gun? You would yell, “No!!!!” You would want to protect them, but they don’t know any better. You weren’t the creator of the gun, but you know how it works and you know what it will do.
How many of you have seen the Lethal Weapon movies? In the first movie, Mel Gibson and Danny Glover are called to a scene where a man is standing on the edge of a roof. When you look at the scene, there are several police cars, rescue vehicles, and a lot of people trying to convince this one man that jumping to his death is not a good idea.
Genesis 1:1 – In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth…
Look at all of these times that it says in 31 short verses that God did something.
God created this place. You walk outside, and you are looking at what God did. The world and everything in it are his. He knows the right way to use the things in this world.
Let’s make it a little more personal
God created you.
Romans 12:2
Don’t be conformed to the way that this world thinks. Instead, have your life changed by renewing your mind.
We need to have the right view of life. Our view of life almost never equals reality.
We were in Tennessee, and a man came up to me, and said, “Are you a celebrity? I swear I saw you on T.V. last night. What’s your name? “John”. “No, that’s not it. Man, I can’t think of it.” He got in his car and left. Later, I was imagining what this guy went home to tell his family and friends. “You guys won’t believe who I saw tonight…”
I don’t imagine any of us are going to be jumping out of planes without parachutes from thousands of feet in the air. I imagine that we all know the dangers of staring down the barrel of a gun.
However, most of you will be asked at some time to smoke some pot, maybe take a line of cocaine, or maybe pop some vicatin pills, have some alcohol. Some of you already have been. Maybe some of you are the ones doing the asking. Some of you will enter into or are already in sexual relationships.
I see you looking down the barrel of a loaded gun, and I want to scream, “No!!!!” But in the end, the choice is up to you. Why? Because, “MY JOURNEY IS MY JOURNEY” (ppt)
Do you know why you are here? Do you know why God created you? What is your purpose? Is your life as exciting and full as it could be? Does your life consist of doing homework, going in and out of relationships, playing PS2 or XBOX or going skateboarding or snowboarding. What is your life all about? If that’s the way that that you spend all of your time, then you are having fun, but you are missing out on what your life could be like. I get a rush of overwhelming emotion when I see someone’s take the next step on their spiritual journey. That’s something you could never get from living a life with no real purpose.
What do you spend your day thinking about? What do you spend your time doing? When you die, how will you be remembered? Will you be a really fun person, or will you be a really fun person who changed his world?
God gave us His word, The Bible, so that we would be able to know what the right way is. God also gave us Himself. He gives each one of us the opportunity to have a relationship with Him. Jesus said, I have come so that you would have life, and that you would have it abundantly. You can’t have that outside of a relationship with him. No matter how hard you try you will never know life the way it could be without Him in it.
Critical Question: Are you developing a consistent devotional and prayer life
Key Passage: Romans 12:2
§ And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. (NASB)
§ Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing, and perfect will. (NIV)
§ Don’t become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants – what is good, pleasing, and perfect. (God’s Word for Students)
§ Don’t copy the behaviors and customs of this world, but be a new and different person with a fresh newness in all you do and think. Then you will learn from your own experience how His ways will really satisfy you. (TLB)
There were two boys who were walking down an old dirt road. It was a hot day. They had just come from Mrs. Smith’s bakery in town. One boy bought a slice of apple pie. The other boy just wanted an apple. Mrs. Smith had a tradition of always giving an apple to anyone who would buy a piece of pie. This was an excellent deal. While they were walking, the boy with the apple pulled it out of his pocket, and was just about to take a bite out of the apple when he noticed something that just wasn’t right. There were two little eyes staring up at him. They were attached to a long, thin, slimy, brown body that had buried itself inside the apple. It was a worm. Now the boy had a decision to make. The worm didn’t look like it would taste all that great even though he has seen people eat worms before. His friend saw the worm in the apple and immediately threw his piece of pie out.
Years ago, Columbus was going to sail around the world and end up in the Indian Islands. They knew that it was way too dangerous to go down around the bottom of Africa, because more than likely their ships would be destroyed going around Cape Hope. They had seen it happen and they needed a safer way to go. Somehow, Columbus found out that the world was round. He believed it enough that he put his own life and the lives of many other men on the line. The perspective or belief up to that point was that you could only sail so far, and then you would fall off the edge of the world. Columbus’ perspective was right on. However, when they landed, they thought that they had landed in the West Indies. So, when Columbus saw the people where he landed, he called them Indians. It didn’t matter how much Columbus wanted to believe that he had landed in the Indian Islands. He was wrong. His perception was wrong. Because of that, this place is called America, named after Amerigo Vespucci. He wasn’t the first to come to America. He was the first to realize that he wasn’t in the Indian Islands.
That’s all nice, but what does that have to do with Real Life? How fast does a plane fly? ___________________It doesn’t look like it’s moving that fast. Are you sure? How do you know?
If someone didn’t believe that gravity was real, how long do you think it would take them to change the way they think if you pushed them out of an airplane going 180 mph?
Why did the boy throw his apple pie away without eating it? He figured that if there was a worm in his friend’s apple, then there was probably a worm in one of the apples used to make his apple pie. Chances are that the apple pie was not worm infested, but the boy didn’t want to take that chance.
Perception is not reality. Reality is reality. There is only one perspective that actually is reality, and that is God’s perspective. Why? Because he is the only one who knows what’s going on. Several years ago, I opened up my Bible to Genesis chapter one (31 verses). That’s the place where it talks about God creating everything. I went on to circle every time that it said someone did something. Every time the someone that did something was God. Do you know why? It’s because, there was no one else there. If you made a potato gun, and I walked over and said, “Oh, what’s down there and looked down the barrel”. You would say, “Don’t put your head in front of the barrel. You are going to get hurt.” What would you do if you saw your baby sister or brother looking down the barrel of a real gun? You would yell, “No!!!!” You would want to protect them, but they don’t know any better. You weren’t the creator of the gun, but you know how it works and you know what it will do.
How many of you have seen the Lethal Weapon movies? In the first movie, Mel Gibson and Danny Glover are called to a scene where a man is standing on the edge of a roof. When you look at the scene, there are several police cars, rescue vehicles, and a lot of people trying to convince this one man that jumping to his death is not a good idea.
Genesis 1:1 – In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth…
Look at all of these times that it says in 31 short verses that God did something.
God created this place. You walk outside, and you are looking at what God did. The world and everything in it are his. He knows the right way to use the things in this world.
Let’s make it a little more personal
God created you.
Romans 12:2
Don’t be conformed to the way that this world thinks. Instead, have your life changed by renewing your mind.
We need to have the right view of life. Our view of life almost never equals reality.
We were in Tennessee, and a man came up to me, and said, “Are you a celebrity? I swear I saw you on T.V. last night. What’s your name? “John”. “No, that’s not it. Man, I can’t think of it.” He got in his car and left. Later, I was imagining what this guy went home to tell his family and friends. “You guys won’t believe who I saw tonight…”
I don’t imagine any of us are going to be jumping out of planes without parachutes from thousands of feet in the air. I imagine that we all know the dangers of staring down the barrel of a gun.
However, most of you will be asked at some time to smoke some pot, maybe take a line of cocaine, or maybe pop some vicatin pills, have some alcohol. Some of you already have been. Maybe some of you are the ones doing the asking. Some of you will enter into or are already in sexual relationships.
I see you looking down the barrel of a loaded gun, and I want to scream, “No!!!!” But in the end, the choice is up to you. Why? Because, “MY JOURNEY IS MY JOURNEY” (ppt)
Do you know why you are here? Do you know why God created you? What is your purpose? Is your life as exciting and full as it could be? Does your life consist of doing homework, going in and out of relationships, playing PS2 or XBOX or going skateboarding or snowboarding. What is your life all about? If that’s the way that that you spend all of your time, then you are having fun, but you are missing out on what your life could be like. I get a rush of overwhelming emotion when I see someone’s take the next step on their spiritual journey. That’s something you could never get from living a life with no real purpose.
What do you spend your day thinking about? What do you spend your time doing? When you die, how will you be remembered? Will you be a really fun person, or will you be a really fun person who changed his world?
God gave us His word, The Bible, so that we would be able to know what the right way is. God also gave us Himself. He gives each one of us the opportunity to have a relationship with Him. Jesus said, I have come so that you would have life, and that you would have it abundantly. You can’t have that outside of a relationship with him. No matter how hard you try you will never know life the way it could be without Him in it.
7 Checkpoints: Authentic Faith - Trusting God
When we break up into our Breakout Sessions tonight, we are going to do a few things:
1) Define the word “Trust”
2) Talk about why you might trust someone or why you might not trust someone
3) Give some examples of trusting and not-so-trusting relationships in your life
4) Talk about what it takes to be a person who can be trusted
Read the Authentic Faith Dilemma on pages 12 & 13
Jared
Lauren
It is so important that we all have a correct understanding of what faith, authentic (real) faith, is. Confusion in this one area is the primary reason teens abandon their faith in God.
I led the discussion in church this past Sunday, basically doing the same thing that I’m doing right now with you, except it was adults. I told a little story. I want to tell it to you now.
The toothpick…. I can’t tell you how important and vital it is to your life that you get it now (not the toothpick, but the principles that we are talking about here at The Grip). It’s a much harder road if you wait to get it later. However, I am confident that at some point in your life, you will get it….
Why do you trust someone?
How do you develop trust for someone?
Do you just trust people blindly? Is that really trust or is that being naïve?
Do you hope for the best and expect the worst? That would be an interesting trusting relationship, always looking over your shoulder for that knife to stab you in the back.
How do you show someone that you trust them?
Can anyone really be trusted?
These are all questions that most of you, on some level, have probably thought about. Maybe you are struggling through this right now in your own life and relationships that you have that should have been trusting, but you have been let down.
Do you trust me? I can ask you that question and you can say, “Yes”. But do you really trust me? Maybe it depends on what you are trusting me for.
Let me tell you a story about a friend of mine named Doug. He and I didn’t go to the same school, but we went to the same church. That’s how we knew eachother. He always bragged about his girlfriend that none of us (us being all of his friends) had ever met. So finally, proof was required of this supposedly really pretty girl that Doug was dating. So Doug pulled out a picture from his wallet. Later he said they broke up, but he had a new girlfriend. Again, none of us knew her. Eventually, he showed us a picture in his wallet. He was right, she was pretty and we didn’t know her. But he was wrong about one very important thing. Somehow the truth got out, Doug’s mystery girl was not his girlfriend, but his cousin. She was pretty, and Doug thought he would impress us, but then when the truth was known it didn’t look so impressive after all.
How do you know when someone is speaking the truth? How do you know whether or not you can believe what other people say?
Sometimes people promise great things, and never follow through. Other times people try to be as bad as they possibly can even though aren’t. For some reason they think that people will be impressed with how “rebellious” they are. It’s so hard to trust what people say as being the truth sometimes.
1) Define the word “Trust”
2) Talk about why you might trust someone or why you might not trust someone
3) Give some examples of trusting and not-so-trusting relationships in your life
4) Talk about what it takes to be a person who can be trusted
Read the Authentic Faith Dilemma on pages 12 & 13
Jared
Lauren
It is so important that we all have a correct understanding of what faith, authentic (real) faith, is. Confusion in this one area is the primary reason teens abandon their faith in God.
I led the discussion in church this past Sunday, basically doing the same thing that I’m doing right now with you, except it was adults. I told a little story. I want to tell it to you now.
The toothpick…. I can’t tell you how important and vital it is to your life that you get it now (not the toothpick, but the principles that we are talking about here at The Grip). It’s a much harder road if you wait to get it later. However, I am confident that at some point in your life, you will get it….
Why do you trust someone?
How do you develop trust for someone?
Do you just trust people blindly? Is that really trust or is that being naïve?
Do you hope for the best and expect the worst? That would be an interesting trusting relationship, always looking over your shoulder for that knife to stab you in the back.
How do you show someone that you trust them?
Can anyone really be trusted?
These are all questions that most of you, on some level, have probably thought about. Maybe you are struggling through this right now in your own life and relationships that you have that should have been trusting, but you have been let down.
Do you trust me? I can ask you that question and you can say, “Yes”. But do you really trust me? Maybe it depends on what you are trusting me for.
Let me tell you a story about a friend of mine named Doug. He and I didn’t go to the same school, but we went to the same church. That’s how we knew eachother. He always bragged about his girlfriend that none of us (us being all of his friends) had ever met. So finally, proof was required of this supposedly really pretty girl that Doug was dating. So Doug pulled out a picture from his wallet. Later he said they broke up, but he had a new girlfriend. Again, none of us knew her. Eventually, he showed us a picture in his wallet. He was right, she was pretty and we didn’t know her. But he was wrong about one very important thing. Somehow the truth got out, Doug’s mystery girl was not his girlfriend, but his cousin. She was pretty, and Doug thought he would impress us, but then when the truth was known it didn’t look so impressive after all.
How do you know when someone is speaking the truth? How do you know whether or not you can believe what other people say?
Sometimes people promise great things, and never follow through. Other times people try to be as bad as they possibly can even though aren’t. For some reason they think that people will be impressed with how “rebellious” they are. It’s so hard to trust what people say as being the truth sometimes.
7 Checkpoints: Authentic Faith - Grace
Billy and Tim were walking to school on Monday morning. The weekend had been pretty rough for both of them. There was a girl in their school named Mary. Tim was crazy about Mary. When Tim and Billy would get together to hang out, the topic of Mary always came up. Billy knew that Tim liked her a lot. He also knew that Mary didn’t really like him. He knew that nothing was ever going to happen between Tim and Mary. Billy was convinced that Tim wasn’t Mary’s type. However, he was also convinced that he was Mary’s type. So on Friday, Billy called her up to ask her out.
Billy and Tim were best friends. Back in 3rd grade Tim and Billy made a pact with each other that nothing would ever come between them. No matter what ever happened in their lives, they would always be best friends.
Billy picked up Mary on Saturday night around 5. They went out to Chuck-e-cheese and got some pizza and played some of the games that were there. Billy won a ton of tickets and went to the counter and got Mary a fake flower. Mary thought that the gesture was nice. Later around 7:30, Billy and Mary went to the mini golf course. What Billy didn’t realize was that this Saturday night was Tim’s night to do something with his dad, just the two of them. And guess what they were going to do. (Mini Golf). Tim and his dad pulled into the parking lot around 8 and then Tim saw Billy with Mary half way through the 4th hole. All of a sudden Tim felt sick to his stomach. He told his dad that he didn’t feel well and just wanted to go home. So they did. His dad asked him what was wrong, but he didn’t want to talk about it.
On Monday morning, Tim didn’t meet Billy at his house, and Billy walked to school alone. Tim would never speak to Billy again. Billy had destroyed their relationship because of the decision that he made.
A true faith is having confidence that God is who He says He is, and that He will do what He says He will do.
What does that have to do with that story?
What did Billy and Tim promise each other when they were in 3rd grade?
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Who knows what a covenant is?
Back in the Old Testament, there was a man named Abraham. They had a custom back in those days. They didn’t have contracts where you would sign on the dotted line. You could shake hands, but when there was an intense contract to be made they did something a little bit different. They would sacrifice an animal by cutting it in half. They would place the half of the animal on one side and the other half on the other side. Then at the same time the two men would walk between the animal halves. That contract was sealed in blood, and if one man broke his part of the bargain, then the deal was off.
God came to Abraham and made a covenant with Him. He told Abraham that his descendants would be as numerous as the stars, and that He would preserve His people no matter what. Then it came time to walk through the animals. God caused Abraham to not be able to walk through the animals, and God walked through them himself. That meant that the only one who could break that promise was God. That promise was unconditional. God would never break that promise. As you read the stories in the Old Testament you see that God never has broken that promise. Abraham’s people have given God plenty of reasons to break the promise, but He never has.
God made a promise to you and to me in John 3:16 – Because God loved the world so much, He gave his only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have eternal life.
Then Jesus died and shed His blood to pay the price for my sins and for your sins.
I am so glad that God keeps His promises. I am so glad that God loves me unconditionally. The Bible says that absolutely nothing will ever separate me from the love of God. It says that even though I am faithless, He remains faithful.
Have you ever done something that you were afraid to tell you mom or dad? Maybe you did something like Billy and betrayed your best friend. Stuff happens. We make bad decisions all the time. We make decisions that hurt others and sometimes we even hurt ourselves.
I want to tell you about a girl I know. She has a relationship with Jesus. She’s made some really bad choices. God has a huge plan for this girl’s life. He continues to love her. Right now she is tearing His heart apart.
Billy and Tim were best friends. Back in 3rd grade Tim and Billy made a pact with each other that nothing would ever come between them. No matter what ever happened in their lives, they would always be best friends.
Billy picked up Mary on Saturday night around 5. They went out to Chuck-e-cheese and got some pizza and played some of the games that were there. Billy won a ton of tickets and went to the counter and got Mary a fake flower. Mary thought that the gesture was nice. Later around 7:30, Billy and Mary went to the mini golf course. What Billy didn’t realize was that this Saturday night was Tim’s night to do something with his dad, just the two of them. And guess what they were going to do. (Mini Golf). Tim and his dad pulled into the parking lot around 8 and then Tim saw Billy with Mary half way through the 4th hole. All of a sudden Tim felt sick to his stomach. He told his dad that he didn’t feel well and just wanted to go home. So they did. His dad asked him what was wrong, but he didn’t want to talk about it.
On Monday morning, Tim didn’t meet Billy at his house, and Billy walked to school alone. Tim would never speak to Billy again. Billy had destroyed their relationship because of the decision that he made.
A true faith is having confidence that God is who He says He is, and that He will do what He says He will do.
What does that have to do with that story?
What did Billy and Tim promise each other when they were in 3rd grade?
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Who knows what a covenant is?
Back in the Old Testament, there was a man named Abraham. They had a custom back in those days. They didn’t have contracts where you would sign on the dotted line. You could shake hands, but when there was an intense contract to be made they did something a little bit different. They would sacrifice an animal by cutting it in half. They would place the half of the animal on one side and the other half on the other side. Then at the same time the two men would walk between the animal halves. That contract was sealed in blood, and if one man broke his part of the bargain, then the deal was off.
God came to Abraham and made a covenant with Him. He told Abraham that his descendants would be as numerous as the stars, and that He would preserve His people no matter what. Then it came time to walk through the animals. God caused Abraham to not be able to walk through the animals, and God walked through them himself. That meant that the only one who could break that promise was God. That promise was unconditional. God would never break that promise. As you read the stories in the Old Testament you see that God never has broken that promise. Abraham’s people have given God plenty of reasons to break the promise, but He never has.
God made a promise to you and to me in John 3:16 – Because God loved the world so much, He gave his only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have eternal life.
Then Jesus died and shed His blood to pay the price for my sins and for your sins.
I am so glad that God keeps His promises. I am so glad that God loves me unconditionally. The Bible says that absolutely nothing will ever separate me from the love of God. It says that even though I am faithless, He remains faithful.
Have you ever done something that you were afraid to tell you mom or dad? Maybe you did something like Billy and betrayed your best friend. Stuff happens. We make bad decisions all the time. We make decisions that hurt others and sometimes we even hurt ourselves.
I want to tell you about a girl I know. She has a relationship with Jesus. She’s made some really bad choices. God has a huge plan for this girl’s life. He continues to love her. Right now she is tearing His heart apart.
7 Checkpoints: Authentic Faith - What is Faith?
Talking about “What is Faith?” What do you want to get out of a discussion on Faith?
When I say “Faith” what do you think of?
Faith is all over our lives.
Is Johnsburg High School going to take the state football championship this year?
Is Richmond Burton going to take the state football championship this year?
George Michael – “You got to have faith, faith, faith”
Group everyone in groups of 4:
What are some other examples of places that we are told that we have to have faith?
So then what is faith? (In groups of 4, come up with a definition or description of what faith is. Then show us what you mean by acting it out in a 30-45 second everyday life skit.)
After each one we’ll talk about what your group came up with.
By the time we are done with this series, you will be shown that “God can be trusted; He will do all that He has promised to do.” You will be faced with the question, “Am I trusting God with the critical areas of my life?”
Object – Teens will understand that Authentic Faith is not rooted in circumstances
People have faith in all kinds of things. People exercise faith throughout their day without even realizing it. We live our entire lives based on faith. (5 things)
1 – You got out of bed this morning and put your feet on what? (A floor)
2 – You stood at a bus-stop and then got on a what? (A bus) Let’s talk about the bus a little bit. How did you know that it would be there to pick you up? How did you know that it would stop in front of you and not roll over you? (Do you stand by the curb or do you stand away? Do you take a step back or do you take a step forward?)
When you have faith in something, you are saying I trust this. I believe that it will do what it claims that it will do?
I never thought that I would be too fat to buy a ladder, but I am.
200 lb limit
I believe that if I get on that ladder and carry something, it’s going to break. I believe it enough to not buy it.
What determines what I believe about God and about this life?
If we were honest, then most of us would say that what I experience in my life determines what I believe. The circumstances that I’m in everyday tell me whether or not God is real and whether or not He loves me or cares for me.
A girl whose father beats her or molests her hears that God is our “Father”. So she believes that God is a jerk and doesn’t care about her, because either He’s just like her dad or he doesn’t care enough to do anything about it.
A boy prays and prays for God to help him pass a test – but he fails. That must mean that God doesn’t answer prayer or maybe God is punishing him. His faith in God is shattered by her interpretation of the circumstances around him.
Faith based on circumstance is fragile, because it is rooted in the present.
How many of you like needles?
A four year old is carried by his dad into the Dr’s office after cutting his hand open on a piece of sharp metal. The doctor pulls out a huge needle to give the child a tetanus shot. Does his father love him? (answer) He doesn’t think so.
The reality of how loving or true God is doesn’t hinge on the different events that happen in our lives.
If that little boy were to look back on his life, he would be thankful that his dad brought him to the doctor to get that shot.
Things happen in our lives. We have good days and we have bad days. Basing what we believe about God on the different events doesn’t work, because we misinterpret events. We don’t have enough knowledge to
Who has heard of the phrase, “Hindsight is 20/20”
It means that you had no idea what you were talking about before when you were going through this, but now I can look back and see what actually was going on.
My ‘frame of reference’ just increased.
Here’s the problem: Joseph as a boy, spent 15 years as a slave in Egypt after being sold into slavery by his own brothers. He spent years in prison for a crime that he didn’t commit. Did care about Joseph? (Yes.) His “tragedy” was a part of an incredible plan that God was weaving behind the scenes to save an entire region from famine. Read the rest of the story (Genesis 37-45).
Your lives are always changing. For many teens, their circumstances defines who God is.
How about you? If God doesn’t answer your prayers by next week, will you wonder if He exists? If you don’t see Him working in your situation, will you lose your confidence in Him?
Can your faith be summarized by this statement: “What’s happening now and what I’m feeling now determine what I believe for now”? If so, then you have a faulty understanding of faith (That’s not what faith is.). Are you ready to replace that faulty understanding with an authentic faith?
When I say “Faith” what do you think of?
Faith is all over our lives.
Is Johnsburg High School going to take the state football championship this year?
Is Richmond Burton going to take the state football championship this year?
George Michael – “You got to have faith, faith, faith”
Group everyone in groups of 4:
What are some other examples of places that we are told that we have to have faith?
So then what is faith? (In groups of 4, come up with a definition or description of what faith is. Then show us what you mean by acting it out in a 30-45 second everyday life skit.)
After each one we’ll talk about what your group came up with.
By the time we are done with this series, you will be shown that “God can be trusted; He will do all that He has promised to do.” You will be faced with the question, “Am I trusting God with the critical areas of my life?”
Object – Teens will understand that Authentic Faith is not rooted in circumstances
People have faith in all kinds of things. People exercise faith throughout their day without even realizing it. We live our entire lives based on faith. (5 things)
1 – You got out of bed this morning and put your feet on what? (A floor)
2 – You stood at a bus-stop and then got on a what? (A bus) Let’s talk about the bus a little bit. How did you know that it would be there to pick you up? How did you know that it would stop in front of you and not roll over you? (Do you stand by the curb or do you stand away? Do you take a step back or do you take a step forward?)
When you have faith in something, you are saying I trust this. I believe that it will do what it claims that it will do?
I never thought that I would be too fat to buy a ladder, but I am.
200 lb limit
I believe that if I get on that ladder and carry something, it’s going to break. I believe it enough to not buy it.
What determines what I believe about God and about this life?
If we were honest, then most of us would say that what I experience in my life determines what I believe. The circumstances that I’m in everyday tell me whether or not God is real and whether or not He loves me or cares for me.
A girl whose father beats her or molests her hears that God is our “Father”. So she believes that God is a jerk and doesn’t care about her, because either He’s just like her dad or he doesn’t care enough to do anything about it.
A boy prays and prays for God to help him pass a test – but he fails. That must mean that God doesn’t answer prayer or maybe God is punishing him. His faith in God is shattered by her interpretation of the circumstances around him.
Faith based on circumstance is fragile, because it is rooted in the present.
How many of you like needles?
A four year old is carried by his dad into the Dr’s office after cutting his hand open on a piece of sharp metal. The doctor pulls out a huge needle to give the child a tetanus shot. Does his father love him? (answer) He doesn’t think so.
The reality of how loving or true God is doesn’t hinge on the different events that happen in our lives.
If that little boy were to look back on his life, he would be thankful that his dad brought him to the doctor to get that shot.
Things happen in our lives. We have good days and we have bad days. Basing what we believe about God on the different events doesn’t work, because we misinterpret events. We don’t have enough knowledge to
Who has heard of the phrase, “Hindsight is 20/20”
It means that you had no idea what you were talking about before when you were going through this, but now I can look back and see what actually was going on.
My ‘frame of reference’ just increased.
Here’s the problem: Joseph as a boy, spent 15 years as a slave in Egypt after being sold into slavery by his own brothers. He spent years in prison for a crime that he didn’t commit. Did care about Joseph? (Yes.) His “tragedy” was a part of an incredible plan that God was weaving behind the scenes to save an entire region from famine. Read the rest of the story (Genesis 37-45).
Your lives are always changing. For many teens, their circumstances defines who God is.
How about you? If God doesn’t answer your prayers by next week, will you wonder if He exists? If you don’t see Him working in your situation, will you lose your confidence in Him?
Can your faith be summarized by this statement: “What’s happening now and what I’m feeling now determine what I believe for now”? If so, then you have a faulty understanding of faith (That’s not what faith is.). Are you ready to replace that faulty understanding with an authentic faith?
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