Three men sat silently on a park bench. They had worked together for 9 years. The first man looked at the others, and said “I can’t believe that they did that. No warning. How am I supposed to support my family now?” The second said, “I hear you… I don’t get it. I thought that we’d be there for another 10 years at least. I’ve poured my sweat and sacrificed time so that our company would succeed. Looking back, I don’t know why I did it. Clearly it wasn’t valued.” The third said nothing. Instead, he leaned back, stretched his arms across the back of the bench, crossed his left leg over his right, allowed his head to fall backwards, and took in a long relaxing breath. After a few more moments of silence, he spoke. “I’ve got a God who loves me unconditionally*, I’ve been learning to see this world the way that He sees it*, I’ve got a wife who I am fully committed to*, I’ve got good friends who speak the truth*, I’ve been learning to make wise choices*, I genuinely care about other people*, and the same God who loves me unconditionally is in control*. So I guess what I’m saying is that I’ve got a good life despite this.
Good morning. My name is John Barnett. I want to thank you for allowing me to come and be with you for the next 4 weeks to talk to you about the good life. This 4 part series will touch on 7 different principles for living the good life. These principles are called, The Seven Checkpoints, as titled by the book written by Andy Stanley and Stuart Hall. As a youth pastor, these principles have been invaluable to me while working with both teens and their parents. As a believer in Christ, understanding and applying these principles to my own life has significantly challenged the way that I think and even act. Romans 12:1 instructs us to not be conformed to the patterns of this world, but to be transformed through the renewing of our minds. Often times, God’s perspective on life is in direct contradiction to the logic and philosophy of this world’s system. God says, “Change your mind”. Our minds need to be transformed from the patterns or thinking of this world, and transformed to His perspective. When I see the world the way that God, the Maker, sees the world, then I will do what He says to do. It will impact my life, and the lives of those around me.
Jesus words are recorded in John 10:10: I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. My paraphrase is simple – “I have come that you might have a good life.”
I want to be careful to not be misunderstood. Jesus is not talking about a life of health, wealth and stability. Typically, our definition of the good life would naturally include those things. However, God is not natural. He’s supernatural. His definition of the good life is a bit different. When we look at people who have what we would consider ‘the good life’ they have comfortable living situations and disposable income. Perhaps there’s more to their story than what you see. Perhaps while they have what appears to be a good life, their hearts are wandering from one baseless hope to the next looking for the answer that will complete them.
The good life is far more meaningful and rewarding than any amount of money or security could offer. The good life is a life lived the way that it was intended to be lived. God, the Maker, created us with purpose. When we live our lives the way that we were made to live, the way that it was intended; we experience the good life. (4 ½ minutes)
The first message in this series is titled, The Good Life: Keepin’ it Real. Today we will examine the first principle, Authentic Faith.
*Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Little Jimmy was laying about on a hill in the middle of a meadow on a warm spring day. Puffy white clouds rolled by and he pondered their shape. Soon, he began to think about God.
"God? Are you really there?" Jimmy said out loud.
To his astonishment a voice came from the clouds. "Yes, Jimmy. What can I do for you?"
Seizing the opportunity, Jimmy asked, "God? What is a million years like to you?"
Knowing that Jimmy could not understand the concept of infinity, God responded in a manner to which Jimmy could relate. "A million years to me, Jimmy, is like a minute."
"Oh," said Jimmy. "Well, then, what's a million dollars like to you?"
"A million dollars to me, Jimmy, is like a penny."
"Wow!" remarked Jimmy, getting an idea. "You're so generous...can I have one of your pennies?"
God replied, "Sure thing, Jimmy! Just a minute."
A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the Post Office received the letter addressed to God, they decided to send it to the president. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to God, which read:
Dear God,
Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those crooks deducted $95.00.
I like these jokes, because they give a glimpse into what the faith of a child might look like. God just is. He doesn’t need any detailed theological discertation to prove His existence or His intentions. The word that seems to best describe a child’s faith is trust.
I don’t know that there is such a thing as different levels of trust. Either you trust or you don’t.
An authentic Faith knows that God can be trusted. He will do all He has promised to do. That’s the principle. God can be trusted; He will do all He has promised to do.
The critical question is Am I trusting God with the critical areas of my life?
Faith Abandoned
The 2 primary reasons that people abandon their faith or experience the shattering of their faith are poor choices and unexplained tragedy. Let me explain poor choices. A person who has placed their faith in Christ is not immune to sin. Sin is still very much a reality. Let’s talk about slander. That Bible says very clearly that it is wrong to slander another person. If I slander someone; I am making a conscious choice to sin. Because I believe that the Bible is truly God’s word, and that God is the ultimate authority, and that as the ultimate authority, God says it’s wrong. There will be a point of conviction that will no doubt be accompanied by some amount of guilt. I will make a decision at that point of conviction. I will either admit that I was wrong or I will alter my worldview to accommodate my sin, and remove my guilt. If I don’t believe that what the Bible says is accurate anymore, then I will cease to feel guilty in that area.
The second situation is unexplained tragedy. Please watch this video with me…
I don’t show that video to emotionally coerce you into acceptance, but rather to get your heart’s attention. The Mooney family had an authentic faith in God. This video is presented as a testimony to the reality of a humble and submissive heart that has jumped into a trusting relationship with God and has experienced the mercy and grace required at a moment of unbelievable suffering.
When we experience unexplained tragedy in our personal lives or are exposed to the tragedy of those around us, a fragile faith will find us at a critical crossroad. Is God really who He says He is, and will He really do all that He has promised to do?
In both situations, we are saying “What’s happening now. What I’m feeling now. Determines what I believe for now.” It may be described as a bandwagon faith.
‘As long as my faith is grounded in what I see and experience, my faith will always be fragile. It will never be more than circumstantial faith – totally dependent upon my ability (or inability) to interpret the events and circumstances around me.’
That doesn’t sound like the direction in Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
Faith Understood (Authentic faith is not a force, power, or wishful thinking)
The difficulty with authentic faith is that it takes me out of the driver’s seat of my own life. I’m not comfortable with that. I want (no I need) to be in control of my life. Unfortunately, it is impossible for me to control everything in my life. I can’t control tragedy. I cannot control whether or not I’m going to get a raise. I can’t control how much the raise will be. I won’t be able to stop my children from making foolish choices as they grow. There are elements of my life that I will never be in control of. I can significantly influence them, but I cannot control them. I want to have as much control of the outcome as I possibly can, because I think I know what is best for my life. So now, I want to control God. I have a connection to a very powerful force, and maybe I can get Him to do my bidding. So I try to find a gimmick in a time of desperation (God if you do this, then I’ll do that). We try and cut a deal. Authentic faith is not a force or a power. It is not a tool that we use to get something from God. Authentic faith is not just wishful thinking either. Wishful thinking describes our wants and desires, but there are no guarantees.
Hebrews 11:1 says that Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.
It is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we don’t see. There is a difference between wishful thinking and authentic faith. Wishful thinking is absent a promise. Faith is rooted in a promise. Authentic Faith is rooted in the absolute promises and unchanging character of God.
Read from the book: pg 35:
In Hebrews 11, the author gives dozens of illustrations of people who showed authentic biblical faith. In every case that faith was grounded in a promise or a revelation from God. Noah spent 140 years building an ark because God promised that it was going to rain. Abraham left his home and set out without a destination in mind because God promised to lead him to a new home. Gideon charged in an enemy camp totally outnumbered because God promised victory. Moses went back to Egypt and confronted Pharaoh because God promised to deliver Israel through him. Joshua marched around Jericho until the walls fell down because God promised success.
While we consciously relinquish control, biblical faith puts God firmly in control of our lives. It leaves God with the option to say no. Only when we come to terms with the true nature of faith will we be able to surrender our will to God’s will. As long as we are trying to get something FROM God, we will have a difficult time surrendering our lives TO God.
The true nature of faith is trusting God with all of my heart, with all of me. I can do that because I know that God is safe. God is a safe place for me. I can completely trust Him to take care of me. I can trust that when tragedy strikes, He is still in control. In Matthew 7:11 Gods says, look at this way – If you, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, then how much more will your Father in Heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him. God can be trusted. He will do all that He has promised.
Authentic Faith requires the active surrender of our lives and wills to the care and commitment of a holy, just and deserving God.
Faith Promises (Authentic Faith holds to God’s mercy and grace)
If we live our lives with the expectation that no ill will befall us, then we will be disappointed. That is a faulty expectation. There is a difference between God’s promises and our expectations. While God doesn’t promise us a hurt free life, He does promise us that we will receive mercy and grace from Him.
Hebrews 4:14-16
Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. 15For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. 16Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
You and I can have full confidence that God will always give us the 2 things that are most critical in our time of need: Mercy and Grace.
While God has not promised to deliver us from our circumstances; He has promised to deliver us through them.
The necessity of Authentic Faith is primarily focused on your and my ability to successfully navigate life. The grounding of our faith plays a significant role in our determining whether or not we will be obedient to God’s direction. Will we follow or say no. If I authentically trust God, then I will follow. If my thinking is faulty, then I will allow it to be corrected. An authentic faith in Jesus Christ will result in our willingness to obey. An authentic faith will also get us through those difficult times (whether they are explainable or not). An authentic faith in the all-powerful, ever-present, all-knowing creator who describes Himself as and proves Himself to be the perfect Father who knows how to give good gifts to His children will weather the storm. An Authentic Faith is a faith that wholly trusts, and is grounded in truth. It does not put false expectations on God. An Authentic Faith is the foundation of these seven checkpoints. Without it, the others will never be.
If I trust in the Lord with all of my heart (complete trust = complete obedience), and don’t lean on my own understanding, but in all of my ways acknowledge Him, then He WILL make my paths straight.
Am I trusting God with the critical areas in my life?
In response to my trust, God will make my paths, my direction, clear and obvious. I can count on it.
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Sunday, April 22, 2007
The Intentional Life
The Intentional Life
Three bicycles were seen riding through the local park. It was clear that 2 of the bicycles belonged to the same family. The third appeared to be riding alone. The first bicycle was equipped with a set of training wheels. An observer could tell that they had been attached to the bike for some time, because of the wobbly way they trailed along with the bike. The second bike was traveling at a very leisurely rate, no doubt INTENT on keeping pace with the smaller bike. The second bike was a bit odd though, because it had 2 sets of pedals, 2 seats, and 2 handlebars. The third bike was entirely different. The rider was dressed in tight, patterned and brightly colored clothes. He was wearing an aerodynamic helmet, and leather gloves. This rider was not out for a gentle glide through the park. He hollered out, “On your left” as he blew right by the couple on the 2 seater. The couple on the 2 seater was a bit annoyed, and called out, “Where’s the fire?” as they shook their heads and rolled their eyes. There was no fire, and ironically the man on the speeding bike wasn’t even trying to get somewhere quickly. He was training for a triathlon he had entered on a dare, and was INTENT on winning or at the very least being beat because someone else was faster and not because he held back. He had no INTENTION of leaving room for regret.
*Living with Intention.
Good morning, and welcome to Woodstock Bible Church. My name is John Barnett. My dad invited me to come and close out the series that you, as a church, have been going through over the past several weeks.
I’ve listened to the “Here’s How” series so far, and coming from someone who has worked directly with youth for 12 years, I thought he did a pretty decent job of getting in touch with his inner teenager as he developed this series. When we were over at the house for Easter, I think that I saw a pimple forming on his nose.
This series set out to communicate how to follow Jesus Christ today. There are seven essential principles being communicated in this series –
Stay Close – Christ’s invitation to follow is an invitation to come. We are not meant to follow at a distance, but in a close and personal way.
Listen Carefully - If we want to follow Jesus then we need to listen to Jesus primarily through His written word and in prayer.
Let Go - If we want to follow Jesus, then we each must develop the art of 'net-less' living. Like the disciples who were fishermen by trade, we too must drop our 'nets'.
Love Well - If we want to follow Jesus then you and I need to love very very carefully...and not selectively. We are called to love people 'as is.'
Share Christ Graciously - We are commissioned by God to share the good news of Jesus Christ and to do so intentionally, but very graciously.
Look Ahead - Authentic Christ followers live for a different world, the world to come. That is where our hope truly lies, not in this world, but in the world that is yet to come.
Essential Principle #7 is Living Intentionally –
*Intentional living requires a reason
*Intentional living requires perspective
*Intentional living requires action
Would you like a good strong inspirational speech? Will that get you where you feel you need to be?
*Today our youth are facing moral decisions that they were never intended to face, because of the blatant degradation of popular media exhibited by the onslaught of ‘adult’ cartoons, the disregard for decency by radio hosts, the easy access to pornographic material on the internet, t-shirt silk screens, and bumper stickers. Parents buy their children parental guidance cd’s and mature rated video games. They sneak them into movies that they have not paid for. They say, “I know that you are going to have sex, so I’m not going to argue about that with you. I only ask that you do it here in my house instead of somewhere unsafe.” “Billy, when I ask you a question; I expect the truth. Don’t lie to me. If you lie to me about this, then how will I be able to trust you.” The phone rings, “Billy, tell them I’m not here.” Parents say, “I want to be their friend. I want them to like me.” And lose sight of the goal, raising a son or daughter to serve Jesus Christ and love Him.
It’s no wonder our teens are confused. It’s no wonder teens are abandoning their faith today in record numbers. If we don’t live our lives with intention; if we don’t live our lives intently focused on the person of Jesus Christ; if we don’t live our lives with purpose and on purpose, then...
Oh, listen to me sounding off. Wow, what passion, what strength of opinion. I’m convinced. Count me in.
I imagine that most teens hearing that rant would be tuned out and thinking –
“You think you know me. You have no idea. You’re just like all the rest who want to relate.”
“I’ve heard all of this before. I’ve tried on Jesus. He didn’t fit.”
“When is this over? I want to go home and listen to my music and play my video games.”
Many parents would be secretly debating me right now. They may be uncomfortable facing fail points in their lives. They may see nothing wrong with anything that I have described so far. That’s ok, because they aren’t the greatest influencers in most teens’ lives. Their friends are. In most of your situations, your friends are an even greater influence in your life than God is. “John, that’s a pretty bold statement to make.” Is it? Why do youth pastors tell everyone to not look around when an invitation to accept Jesus Christ is presented? It’s to remove the negative influence of peers. God may be pulling and tugging at you to make a decision to follow Him, the most important decision you will ever make in your life, but if you think someone else in the room can see you, then you may not raise your hand, let alone stand or come forward. You may want to follow Christ in that moment or any moment, but if the eyes of your friend change your mind, then you aren’t following Christ. You are following your friend.
While I agree with everything that I said, I don’t think that my ranting is going to significantly change or impact anyone’s life here today. If that were my intention, then I would have failed miserably, because everything that you are thinking is probably more close to the truth than I would care to admit. I don’t know you. I have no idea. On some level, I may be just like all the rest who want to relate. I may have fired some of you up, and got your blood moving. You may have made an emotional decision to change something in your life in the last 30 seconds, but it probably won’t be a lasting one. Let me talk about real change… Father’s Day. My family visited a church in St. Charles. The pastor delivered a well-planned and clearly illustrated and impactful message about life’s storms, but I didn’t walk away with any life change from that message. This is what impacted me: when the worship leader was welcoming everyone, he said along with other things, “This is Father’s Day, and maybe God brought you into this place today to love you and to hold you, and show you what a Father’s love is about.” I thought of my son, and the way that I would yell at him in anger, and it was as if I could feel my heart break. I love my sons, and I want to be a primary influence in my children’s lives. That requires a relationship. That requires trust. That requires integrity. I want them to be able to understand who God is when they look at their father. That day I stopped. It wasn’t because of an elegant, well-crafted speech. It was because real change happens in the heart. I’m not talking about the transfer of knowledge from your mind to your heart. I’m talking about a connection of one heart to another. That Sunday, my heart connected with God’s. So this morning, I want to share with you from my heart, and my prayer is that as your hearts connect to mine, that most importantly, your hearts will connect to God’s. That’s real and that’s powerful.
First, I want to point out the irony of the intentional life. Absolutely, everyone lives life with intention, known or unknown, from a baby struggling to breathe on its own, to the insane gunman at Virginia Tech. Every action is spawned from a purpose or intent to accomplish something; whether we are talking about your morning routine, the ‘white lie’ you constructed to save face with your boss or coworker, or even coming here this morning. Every action is spawned from intent.
The impact of the intentional life can be catastrophic, it may be mundane, and it may be amazing.
In the Old Testament we are told the story of David and Bathsheba. David saw Bathsheba bathing on the roof of her home, his heart was consumed by lust; he wanted her. His army, of which her husband was a loyal member, was going into battle. David ordered her husband to the front of the line. He obeyed his commanding officer, and was killed that day in battle. David took Bathsheba into his home to “care for the grieving widow”. David had intentions, secret intentions actually, but God knew, and that’s why you can read about it today. Can you imagine penning that story as God is giving you the words to write. All of this time, you thought that David was a good king caring for his people. I think you’d have to put your pen down, and ask God to repeat himself a few times. “You mean to tell me that David intended to do that – He purposed in his heart to do that?” God replies, “Yes, shall we write about your secret intentions instead.” “No that’s ok. I believe you.”
*Our intentions, our willingness to pursue our intentions, and the actions that we take to accomplish our intentions have impact.
Two men were driving and dreaming through the rural countryside. After many detailed conversations with a carefully targeted consumer population, they had settled on a fairly high-level description of their end product. They felt it would be unwise to isolate their end product to one mold so they determined to design a flexible facility that would allow them to shift their production requirements rapidly to maintain synergy and momentum as the desires and needs of the consumer population changed which inevitably they would. They developed their costing models and billing strategies, constructed a well-planned and executable business plan, located a well-populated cluster of industry-free and financially struggling communities, gained trust and approval from the appropriate community leaders and local Chambers of Commerce, acquired sufficient funds from several investors, they consulted and contracted with several distribution networks, they took bids on the construction of their facility, and then a factory was built. While the factory was being built, the two men contracted with a process consulting firm. The firm assisted them in developing quality processes designed to ensure quality in their deliverable and yield as few defects and rework waste as possible. Plant managers, Shift Supervisors, Machine Operators, and Administrative personnel were hired and trained. Assembly began, and eventually three bicycles were seen riding through the local park.
Our intentions, our willingness to pursue our intentions, and the actions that we take to accomplish our intentions have impact.
A verse that became a life verse and center point for me a few years ago is John 10:10
*Jesus says, “I came that you might have life, and might have it abundantly.” I paraphrase that verse to say, “I came that you might have a good life.” That was Jesus intention. He came so that you would have the opportunity to have a good life. Most of you know what that intention cost Him. He laid down His own life for us. He knew the cost, but He also understood the impact. He paid the penalty for our sins so that we would not have to. You may hear that paraphrase, “I came that you might have a good life”, and think, “Sign me up, ‘cause I was just at the car show, and I really liked that Hummer.” I was at the car show, and the one that really caught my eye was the truck that has a big-rig front end, and a pickup bed back end. I was close to drooling. I had a really big grin on my face as my wife took my picture in the front seat. I didn’t get to sit in the driver’s seat though, because there was a little kid there. I think he may have actually been drooling. Sitting in the truck was nice. Owning the truck would be nicer. Paying for the gas to get the truck around; maybe not so much. But this verse never came to mind in that moment, because that’s not what this is about. Our selfish idea of a “good life” usually takes us down a path that will fulfill our perceived needs. Jesus didn’t die so that I could have a nice house, an easy commute to work, a chrome covered car, a nice stereo system, extravagant and memorable vacations, friends who adore me and lift me on their shoulders to show the world that they are friends with me, free gasoline or diesel for life, Fast food French fries that are perfectly salted, just came out of the oil, and overflowing their super-sized container and into my mouth, and He clearly didn’t die so that my son, Max, could have the blue ninja turtle from McDonalds, because I can’t find one anywhere.
Jesus died to meet our real, true needs. There are really only two of those. We have a need to be saved from an eternity separated from Him, and we have a need to be in a close intimate relationship with Him. Neither of those needs could ever be met if He didn’t sacrifice His life to save ours. We accept him as our Savior, and we are saved from an eternity apart from Him. We make daily and moment by moment decisions to follow Him, and we experience closeness and intimacy with Him. The ‘good life’ that Jesus came for, is a life being lived the way that it was intended.
Living with Intention. Here’s How –
*1) A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason.
Hebrews 12:2
“Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
The “joy set before Him”: what was that joy? This verse gives the impression that Jesus could almost tangibly experience the elation, the overwhelming sense of pleasure, the joy that was set before Him. A part of that joy may have been pleasing His Father, and receiving His Father’s praise. His joy may have been knowing that the pain and agony that He was experiencing on the cross would cease, and He would be in paradise. I think that most of His joy, the thing that drove him to pursue His intention was you. I think that it was me. His joy is made fuller when you place your faith in Him, and enter into a personal relationship with Him and leave a life that was being lived apart from Him. His joy will be made complete when He comes again to take all of us who have placed our faith in Him to physically be with Him for all eternity.
The joy set before Him was you, and the joy set before you is Him. He is the reason that so many people have endured prison, torture and even death.
“They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were tempted, they were put to death with the sword; they went about in sheepskins, in goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated.
(men of whom the world was not worthy), wandering in deserts and mountains and caves and holes in the ground.”
Why? “Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
They had a reason. They believed that God was who He said He was, and that He would do all that He had promised.
You must have an Authentic Faith in Jesus Christ. That means that you believe that He is who He claims to be, and that He will do everything that He has promised to do.
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
* 2) A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective.
Your perception is not necessarily reality. I like to think that each of us lives with our own perception bubble. We have learned to interpret and understand life through the different experiences that we have encountered, both good and bad. They have created and continue to form our world views. Your world view may be drastically different than mine. Our decisions, actions, and responses are based on our worldview. There’s a problem with that. My worldview is faulty, and incomplete. God doesn’t have a perception bubble. He has a reality bubble. He transcends our limited perceptions. If our perspective that generates our decisions that determine our intentions that dictate our actions are based on our worldview, then we fall short. That’s why I used to think that it was a big deal when someone would wear jeans to church. God couldn’t be okay with that. I remember when I came here about 10 years ago to visit, I saw girls wearing camo pants. There’s no way that God could be okay with that. Wow was I off…. You see Jesus called the Pharisees (the holy people) ‘white washed tombs’. He meant that they were pretty and pleasing on the outside, but inside they were dead and decayed. God doesn’t care what I wear, He cares about my heart. We must learn to see the world the way that God sees the world. When we see the world the way that God sees the world; we will do what He says.
In fact one of the most important instructions that we were given by God can be found in Matthew 28:19 and 20
Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded…
When we see the world as God sees it, then we will see the people that he created in a way that doesn’t cast judgment and doesn’t assign shame. Instead, we will see their hearts and be concerned about whether or not they will have an opportunity to experience the abundant life that Christ died for here on this earth, and whether or not they will experience an eternity in the presence of Christ worshipping and serving Him. When we see our neighbors, coworkers, friends, and even those that seem to naturally rub us the wrong way… When we see others the way that God sees them, then we will do what He says. We will reach out to them. We will enter their world(s). We will love them, and share the impact that our relationship with Christ has on our life today, and share the hope and expectations that we have for an eternity in Christ’s presence.
Romans 12:2 says,
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.
I like a version from a Bible paraphrase called “God’s Word for Students”
Don’t become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants – what is good, pleasing, and perfect.
If the perspective that generates our decisions that determine our intentions that dictate our actions are based on God’s worldview, then we will be following Jesus Christ and making an amazing impact on the world that we live in.
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective
*3) A life intent of following Christ requires action.
Hebrews 12:1
“Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance, and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.”
These are action words – Lay Aside. I have to intentionally lay aside every encumbrance. That can be a lot of things. It’s not always bad things that get in our way. Sometimes it’s a t.v. show that you have to see, you don’t have a VCR and you don’t have DVR or a TIVO, so you skip out on your small group so that you don’t miss the tense, life changing, Christ focused experience on your t.v.; maybe it’s well-intentioned blogging that is full of theological debate. Is it moving you closer to Christ or cluttering your mind with confusion? Now follow this. You have a report that you have to get done in order to pass your journalism class, you really like your new skateboard deck so you strap your board to your backpack every day and go to the skatepark everyday after school’s out, go to work, come home and go to bed. But that report has to get done or you will fail. You usually spend about 15-30 minutes reading your Bible, praying, and journaling in the morning. You think to yourself, “I really need to get that report done. It’s going to take me 3 hours to do it. If I just cut out my God time in the morning for a week, then I’ll get my report done, be well on my way to becoming a professional skater, and pick up my Bible next week.” There are a lot of things that get in our way and sometimes we don’t even realize it. But we are told to “Lay them aside”. Don’t merely intend to lay them aside, we need to actually take action. We are also to lay aside the sin, the bad stuff, those things that creep in and corrode our relationship with Christ. We are told to lay those aside, too.
And let us RUN… We have to be moving. We have to be actively pursuing our intentions. We have to be in active pursuit of Christ.
Some practical steps:
· If you aren’t in a small group already, then get in one.
· If you are in a small group, then be an active participant.
· If you need focused help identifying barriers that you feel are in the way of following Christ, then your church has a peer counseling program call, “Genesis”. Sign up.
· If you can’t remember the last time you shared the impact of your faith with someone else, then do that.
· Maybe you need to go out to a park and just sit under a tree with a journaling book, or a sketch pad, and appreciate God’s creation.
Be in active pursuit of Christ.
Your intentional living will make an impact. Just like a father asks his daughter’s date to the prom, “What are your intentions with my daughter?” Jesus asks you, “What are your intentions with the life that I have given you? I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly.”*
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires action
To Teens:
You live in a difficult world. You are encountering ideas and concepts that older generations had never even conceived of. The lyrics of your music are raw and direct. Destructive behavior that at one time were despised and avoided at all costs are now considered a natural part of the teenage life experience. Conversation topics that used to cause people to blush, don’t have the same effect because of what older generations would call a loss of innocence. All of that may be true, shock older generations, and cause parents to be concerned for their children. But you guys are growing up. Like the music you listen to, you are raw and direct. Your hearts are open and vulnerable. I think that Jesus is pleased when He see teens worship. When He see teens drop to their knees, raise their hands, hug eachother, cry on eachother, and pursue Him.
You have some of the biggest decisions of life ahead of you.
If you can begin now to see the way that God sees, then you will be more inclined to do what He says in these decisive moments.
I would like to close with a section from this book called, GOD’S BLOGS. It’s titled, Time:
Three bicycles were seen riding through the local park. It was clear that 2 of the bicycles belonged to the same family. The third appeared to be riding alone. The first bicycle was equipped with a set of training wheels. An observer could tell that they had been attached to the bike for some time, because of the wobbly way they trailed along with the bike. The second bike was traveling at a very leisurely rate, no doubt INTENT on keeping pace with the smaller bike. The second bike was a bit odd though, because it had 2 sets of pedals, 2 seats, and 2 handlebars. The third bike was entirely different. The rider was dressed in tight, patterned and brightly colored clothes. He was wearing an aerodynamic helmet, and leather gloves. This rider was not out for a gentle glide through the park. He hollered out, “On your left” as he blew right by the couple on the 2 seater. The couple on the 2 seater was a bit annoyed, and called out, “Where’s the fire?” as they shook their heads and rolled their eyes. There was no fire, and ironically the man on the speeding bike wasn’t even trying to get somewhere quickly. He was training for a triathlon he had entered on a dare, and was INTENT on winning or at the very least being beat because someone else was faster and not because he held back. He had no INTENTION of leaving room for regret.
*Living with Intention.
Good morning, and welcome to Woodstock Bible Church. My name is John Barnett. My dad invited me to come and close out the series that you, as a church, have been going through over the past several weeks.
I’ve listened to the “Here’s How” series so far, and coming from someone who has worked directly with youth for 12 years, I thought he did a pretty decent job of getting in touch with his inner teenager as he developed this series. When we were over at the house for Easter, I think that I saw a pimple forming on his nose.
This series set out to communicate how to follow Jesus Christ today. There are seven essential principles being communicated in this series –
Stay Close – Christ’s invitation to follow is an invitation to come. We are not meant to follow at a distance, but in a close and personal way.
Listen Carefully - If we want to follow Jesus then we need to listen to Jesus primarily through His written word and in prayer.
Let Go - If we want to follow Jesus, then we each must develop the art of 'net-less' living. Like the disciples who were fishermen by trade, we too must drop our 'nets'.
Love Well - If we want to follow Jesus then you and I need to love very very carefully...and not selectively. We are called to love people 'as is.'
Share Christ Graciously - We are commissioned by God to share the good news of Jesus Christ and to do so intentionally, but very graciously.
Look Ahead - Authentic Christ followers live for a different world, the world to come. That is where our hope truly lies, not in this world, but in the world that is yet to come.
Essential Principle #7 is Living Intentionally –
*Intentional living requires a reason
*Intentional living requires perspective
*Intentional living requires action
Would you like a good strong inspirational speech? Will that get you where you feel you need to be?
*Today our youth are facing moral decisions that they were never intended to face, because of the blatant degradation of popular media exhibited by the onslaught of ‘adult’ cartoons, the disregard for decency by radio hosts, the easy access to pornographic material on the internet, t-shirt silk screens, and bumper stickers. Parents buy their children parental guidance cd’s and mature rated video games. They sneak them into movies that they have not paid for. They say, “I know that you are going to have sex, so I’m not going to argue about that with you. I only ask that you do it here in my house instead of somewhere unsafe.” “Billy, when I ask you a question; I expect the truth. Don’t lie to me. If you lie to me about this, then how will I be able to trust you.” The phone rings, “Billy, tell them I’m not here.” Parents say, “I want to be their friend. I want them to like me.” And lose sight of the goal, raising a son or daughter to serve Jesus Christ and love Him.
It’s no wonder our teens are confused. It’s no wonder teens are abandoning their faith today in record numbers. If we don’t live our lives with intention; if we don’t live our lives intently focused on the person of Jesus Christ; if we don’t live our lives with purpose and on purpose, then...
Oh, listen to me sounding off. Wow, what passion, what strength of opinion. I’m convinced. Count me in.
I imagine that most teens hearing that rant would be tuned out and thinking –
“You think you know me. You have no idea. You’re just like all the rest who want to relate.”
“I’ve heard all of this before. I’ve tried on Jesus. He didn’t fit.”
“When is this over? I want to go home and listen to my music and play my video games.”
Many parents would be secretly debating me right now. They may be uncomfortable facing fail points in their lives. They may see nothing wrong with anything that I have described so far. That’s ok, because they aren’t the greatest influencers in most teens’ lives. Their friends are. In most of your situations, your friends are an even greater influence in your life than God is. “John, that’s a pretty bold statement to make.” Is it? Why do youth pastors tell everyone to not look around when an invitation to accept Jesus Christ is presented? It’s to remove the negative influence of peers. God may be pulling and tugging at you to make a decision to follow Him, the most important decision you will ever make in your life, but if you think someone else in the room can see you, then you may not raise your hand, let alone stand or come forward. You may want to follow Christ in that moment or any moment, but if the eyes of your friend change your mind, then you aren’t following Christ. You are following your friend.
While I agree with everything that I said, I don’t think that my ranting is going to significantly change or impact anyone’s life here today. If that were my intention, then I would have failed miserably, because everything that you are thinking is probably more close to the truth than I would care to admit. I don’t know you. I have no idea. On some level, I may be just like all the rest who want to relate. I may have fired some of you up, and got your blood moving. You may have made an emotional decision to change something in your life in the last 30 seconds, but it probably won’t be a lasting one. Let me talk about real change… Father’s Day. My family visited a church in St. Charles. The pastor delivered a well-planned and clearly illustrated and impactful message about life’s storms, but I didn’t walk away with any life change from that message. This is what impacted me: when the worship leader was welcoming everyone, he said along with other things, “This is Father’s Day, and maybe God brought you into this place today to love you and to hold you, and show you what a Father’s love is about.” I thought of my son, and the way that I would yell at him in anger, and it was as if I could feel my heart break. I love my sons, and I want to be a primary influence in my children’s lives. That requires a relationship. That requires trust. That requires integrity. I want them to be able to understand who God is when they look at their father. That day I stopped. It wasn’t because of an elegant, well-crafted speech. It was because real change happens in the heart. I’m not talking about the transfer of knowledge from your mind to your heart. I’m talking about a connection of one heart to another. That Sunday, my heart connected with God’s. So this morning, I want to share with you from my heart, and my prayer is that as your hearts connect to mine, that most importantly, your hearts will connect to God’s. That’s real and that’s powerful.
First, I want to point out the irony of the intentional life. Absolutely, everyone lives life with intention, known or unknown, from a baby struggling to breathe on its own, to the insane gunman at Virginia Tech. Every action is spawned from a purpose or intent to accomplish something; whether we are talking about your morning routine, the ‘white lie’ you constructed to save face with your boss or coworker, or even coming here this morning. Every action is spawned from intent.
The impact of the intentional life can be catastrophic, it may be mundane, and it may be amazing.
In the Old Testament we are told the story of David and Bathsheba. David saw Bathsheba bathing on the roof of her home, his heart was consumed by lust; he wanted her. His army, of which her husband was a loyal member, was going into battle. David ordered her husband to the front of the line. He obeyed his commanding officer, and was killed that day in battle. David took Bathsheba into his home to “care for the grieving widow”. David had intentions, secret intentions actually, but God knew, and that’s why you can read about it today. Can you imagine penning that story as God is giving you the words to write. All of this time, you thought that David was a good king caring for his people. I think you’d have to put your pen down, and ask God to repeat himself a few times. “You mean to tell me that David intended to do that – He purposed in his heart to do that?” God replies, “Yes, shall we write about your secret intentions instead.” “No that’s ok. I believe you.”
*Our intentions, our willingness to pursue our intentions, and the actions that we take to accomplish our intentions have impact.
Two men were driving and dreaming through the rural countryside. After many detailed conversations with a carefully targeted consumer population, they had settled on a fairly high-level description of their end product. They felt it would be unwise to isolate their end product to one mold so they determined to design a flexible facility that would allow them to shift their production requirements rapidly to maintain synergy and momentum as the desires and needs of the consumer population changed which inevitably they would. They developed their costing models and billing strategies, constructed a well-planned and executable business plan, located a well-populated cluster of industry-free and financially struggling communities, gained trust and approval from the appropriate community leaders and local Chambers of Commerce, acquired sufficient funds from several investors, they consulted and contracted with several distribution networks, they took bids on the construction of their facility, and then a factory was built. While the factory was being built, the two men contracted with a process consulting firm. The firm assisted them in developing quality processes designed to ensure quality in their deliverable and yield as few defects and rework waste as possible. Plant managers, Shift Supervisors, Machine Operators, and Administrative personnel were hired and trained. Assembly began, and eventually three bicycles were seen riding through the local park.
Our intentions, our willingness to pursue our intentions, and the actions that we take to accomplish our intentions have impact.
A verse that became a life verse and center point for me a few years ago is John 10:10
*Jesus says, “I came that you might have life, and might have it abundantly.” I paraphrase that verse to say, “I came that you might have a good life.” That was Jesus intention. He came so that you would have the opportunity to have a good life. Most of you know what that intention cost Him. He laid down His own life for us. He knew the cost, but He also understood the impact. He paid the penalty for our sins so that we would not have to. You may hear that paraphrase, “I came that you might have a good life”, and think, “Sign me up, ‘cause I was just at the car show, and I really liked that Hummer.” I was at the car show, and the one that really caught my eye was the truck that has a big-rig front end, and a pickup bed back end. I was close to drooling. I had a really big grin on my face as my wife took my picture in the front seat. I didn’t get to sit in the driver’s seat though, because there was a little kid there. I think he may have actually been drooling. Sitting in the truck was nice. Owning the truck would be nicer. Paying for the gas to get the truck around; maybe not so much. But this verse never came to mind in that moment, because that’s not what this is about. Our selfish idea of a “good life” usually takes us down a path that will fulfill our perceived needs. Jesus didn’t die so that I could have a nice house, an easy commute to work, a chrome covered car, a nice stereo system, extravagant and memorable vacations, friends who adore me and lift me on their shoulders to show the world that they are friends with me, free gasoline or diesel for life, Fast food French fries that are perfectly salted, just came out of the oil, and overflowing their super-sized container and into my mouth, and He clearly didn’t die so that my son, Max, could have the blue ninja turtle from McDonalds, because I can’t find one anywhere.
Jesus died to meet our real, true needs. There are really only two of those. We have a need to be saved from an eternity separated from Him, and we have a need to be in a close intimate relationship with Him. Neither of those needs could ever be met if He didn’t sacrifice His life to save ours. We accept him as our Savior, and we are saved from an eternity apart from Him. We make daily and moment by moment decisions to follow Him, and we experience closeness and intimacy with Him. The ‘good life’ that Jesus came for, is a life being lived the way that it was intended.
Living with Intention. Here’s How –
*1) A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason.
Hebrews 12:2
“Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
The “joy set before Him”: what was that joy? This verse gives the impression that Jesus could almost tangibly experience the elation, the overwhelming sense of pleasure, the joy that was set before Him. A part of that joy may have been pleasing His Father, and receiving His Father’s praise. His joy may have been knowing that the pain and agony that He was experiencing on the cross would cease, and He would be in paradise. I think that most of His joy, the thing that drove him to pursue His intention was you. I think that it was me. His joy is made fuller when you place your faith in Him, and enter into a personal relationship with Him and leave a life that was being lived apart from Him. His joy will be made complete when He comes again to take all of us who have placed our faith in Him to physically be with Him for all eternity.
The joy set before Him was you, and the joy set before you is Him. He is the reason that so many people have endured prison, torture and even death.
“They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were tempted, they were put to death with the sword; they went about in sheepskins, in goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated.
(men of whom the world was not worthy), wandering in deserts and mountains and caves and holes in the ground.”
Why? “Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
They had a reason. They believed that God was who He said He was, and that He would do all that He had promised.
You must have an Authentic Faith in Jesus Christ. That means that you believe that He is who He claims to be, and that He will do everything that He has promised to do.
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
* 2) A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective.
Your perception is not necessarily reality. I like to think that each of us lives with our own perception bubble. We have learned to interpret and understand life through the different experiences that we have encountered, both good and bad. They have created and continue to form our world views. Your world view may be drastically different than mine. Our decisions, actions, and responses are based on our worldview. There’s a problem with that. My worldview is faulty, and incomplete. God doesn’t have a perception bubble. He has a reality bubble. He transcends our limited perceptions. If our perspective that generates our decisions that determine our intentions that dictate our actions are based on our worldview, then we fall short. That’s why I used to think that it was a big deal when someone would wear jeans to church. God couldn’t be okay with that. I remember when I came here about 10 years ago to visit, I saw girls wearing camo pants. There’s no way that God could be okay with that. Wow was I off…. You see Jesus called the Pharisees (the holy people) ‘white washed tombs’. He meant that they were pretty and pleasing on the outside, but inside they were dead and decayed. God doesn’t care what I wear, He cares about my heart. We must learn to see the world the way that God sees the world. When we see the world the way that God sees the world; we will do what He says.
In fact one of the most important instructions that we were given by God can be found in Matthew 28:19 and 20
Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded…
When we see the world as God sees it, then we will see the people that he created in a way that doesn’t cast judgment and doesn’t assign shame. Instead, we will see their hearts and be concerned about whether or not they will have an opportunity to experience the abundant life that Christ died for here on this earth, and whether or not they will experience an eternity in the presence of Christ worshipping and serving Him. When we see our neighbors, coworkers, friends, and even those that seem to naturally rub us the wrong way… When we see others the way that God sees them, then we will do what He says. We will reach out to them. We will enter their world(s). We will love them, and share the impact that our relationship with Christ has on our life today, and share the hope and expectations that we have for an eternity in Christ’s presence.
Romans 12:2 says,
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.
I like a version from a Bible paraphrase called “God’s Word for Students”
Don’t become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants – what is good, pleasing, and perfect.
If the perspective that generates our decisions that determine our intentions that dictate our actions are based on God’s worldview, then we will be following Jesus Christ and making an amazing impact on the world that we live in.
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective
*3) A life intent of following Christ requires action.
Hebrews 12:1
“Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance, and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.”
These are action words – Lay Aside. I have to intentionally lay aside every encumbrance. That can be a lot of things. It’s not always bad things that get in our way. Sometimes it’s a t.v. show that you have to see, you don’t have a VCR and you don’t have DVR or a TIVO, so you skip out on your small group so that you don’t miss the tense, life changing, Christ focused experience on your t.v.; maybe it’s well-intentioned blogging that is full of theological debate. Is it moving you closer to Christ or cluttering your mind with confusion? Now follow this. You have a report that you have to get done in order to pass your journalism class, you really like your new skateboard deck so you strap your board to your backpack every day and go to the skatepark everyday after school’s out, go to work, come home and go to bed. But that report has to get done or you will fail. You usually spend about 15-30 minutes reading your Bible, praying, and journaling in the morning. You think to yourself, “I really need to get that report done. It’s going to take me 3 hours to do it. If I just cut out my God time in the morning for a week, then I’ll get my report done, be well on my way to becoming a professional skater, and pick up my Bible next week.” There are a lot of things that get in our way and sometimes we don’t even realize it. But we are told to “Lay them aside”. Don’t merely intend to lay them aside, we need to actually take action. We are also to lay aside the sin, the bad stuff, those things that creep in and corrode our relationship with Christ. We are told to lay those aside, too.
And let us RUN… We have to be moving. We have to be actively pursuing our intentions. We have to be in active pursuit of Christ.
Some practical steps:
· If you aren’t in a small group already, then get in one.
· If you are in a small group, then be an active participant.
· If you need focused help identifying barriers that you feel are in the way of following Christ, then your church has a peer counseling program call, “Genesis”. Sign up.
· If you can’t remember the last time you shared the impact of your faith with someone else, then do that.
· Maybe you need to go out to a park and just sit under a tree with a journaling book, or a sketch pad, and appreciate God’s creation.
Be in active pursuit of Christ.
Your intentional living will make an impact. Just like a father asks his daughter’s date to the prom, “What are your intentions with my daughter?” Jesus asks you, “What are your intentions with the life that I have given you? I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly.”*
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires a reason
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires perspective
A life intent on following Jesus Christ requires action
To Teens:
You live in a difficult world. You are encountering ideas and concepts that older generations had never even conceived of. The lyrics of your music are raw and direct. Destructive behavior that at one time were despised and avoided at all costs are now considered a natural part of the teenage life experience. Conversation topics that used to cause people to blush, don’t have the same effect because of what older generations would call a loss of innocence. All of that may be true, shock older generations, and cause parents to be concerned for their children. But you guys are growing up. Like the music you listen to, you are raw and direct. Your hearts are open and vulnerable. I think that Jesus is pleased when He see teens worship. When He see teens drop to their knees, raise their hands, hug eachother, cry on eachother, and pursue Him.
You have some of the biggest decisions of life ahead of you.
- Who will I marry?
- Where will I work?
- How will I fit into society?
- Should I obey my parent’s curfew?Mom and dad won’t mind if I’m a few minutes late.I’m old enough to be out past 10:00.
- Which friends will I hang out with this weekend?This friend is boring, but safe.This friend is fun, but dangerous.
- What do I want my life to be like?
- What will I do if someone offers me drugs at the party?I see other people here doing it.I’m young, shouldn’t I experiment a little.I didn’t know that he did drugs; they must be okay then.
- What will happen if my date pressures me for sex?If I don’t do it, then he’ll think I’m a prudeHe wouldn’t ask me if he didn’t love me, right?
If you can begin now to see the way that God sees, then you will be more inclined to do what He says in these decisive moments.
I would like to close with a section from this book called, GOD’S BLOGS. It’s titled, Time:
Sunday, March 4, 2007
7 Checkpoints: Ultimate Authority - To the Max
.:Maximum Freedom is found under God’s Authority:.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
This verse is pretty straight-forward.
Who must submit to authority? Everyone
Why must everyone submit to authority? Because God established it.
Who is God? What is your view of God? What place does God have in your life?
The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Stop me if you’ve heard this -
In the beginning, GOD created the heavens and the earth.
God was here first…… not you and not me
Every sentence has a noun and a verb. In Genesis chapter 1, every sentence has a noun and a verb. The noun in every sentence is the same. (Read it)
Job 40 and 41 (probably one of the most powerful expressions of who God is)
Job’s response in Job 42: 1-6
How many of you have a problem with you mom or dad giving you the answer, “Because I said so…”? Why is that?
Isaiah 6:1-5
The prophet Isaiah had a vision of the awesomeness of who God is, and he describes it.
Let me make a counter-cultural statement
We don’t submit to our parents authority, and we don’t submit to the legal authorities, because we don’t have a proper understanding of our place. We don’t understand where we fit. Every part of us is wanting to create our own boundaries instead of living inside boundaries that are already created. In short we have a desire to be the ultimate authority of our own lives. I make the rules. The problem is that there is only one ultimate authority, and that is God.
Who is God, that I should listen and obey? The Bible tells us that God is love. God is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. God is fair. It also very clearly tells us that God is the Ultimate Authority (The Stone was rolled away)
------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Is “Because I said so” ever an adequate reason for obedience? Why or Why not?
Have your parents ever asked you to do something that you didn’t do on purpose? What was it and why didn’t you do it?
Name five authority figures (or 5 relationships that you have – my parent; my coach; my teacher; my probation officer; etc…) who you have deliberately disobeyed at any time in your life. (Name more if you can)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
What would cause you to make the decision to not obey the instructions of an authority figure? (Is there something that you are expecting from them before you will obey them? Are you just stubborn?)
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
This verse is pretty straight-forward.
Who must submit to authority? Everyone
Why must everyone submit to authority? Because God established it.
Who is God? What is your view of God? What place does God have in your life?
The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Stop me if you’ve heard this -
In the beginning, GOD created the heavens and the earth.
God was here first…… not you and not me
Every sentence has a noun and a verb. In Genesis chapter 1, every sentence has a noun and a verb. The noun in every sentence is the same. (Read it)
Job 40 and 41 (probably one of the most powerful expressions of who God is)
Job’s response in Job 42: 1-6
How many of you have a problem with you mom or dad giving you the answer, “Because I said so…”? Why is that?
Isaiah 6:1-5
The prophet Isaiah had a vision of the awesomeness of who God is, and he describes it.
Let me make a counter-cultural statement
We don’t submit to our parents authority, and we don’t submit to the legal authorities, because we don’t have a proper understanding of our place. We don’t understand where we fit. Every part of us is wanting to create our own boundaries instead of living inside boundaries that are already created. In short we have a desire to be the ultimate authority of our own lives. I make the rules. The problem is that there is only one ultimate authority, and that is God.
Who is God, that I should listen and obey? The Bible tells us that God is love. God is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. God is fair. It also very clearly tells us that God is the Ultimate Authority (The Stone was rolled away)
------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Is “Because I said so” ever an adequate reason for obedience? Why or Why not?
Have your parents ever asked you to do something that you didn’t do on purpose? What was it and why didn’t you do it?
Name five authority figures (or 5 relationships that you have – my parent; my coach; my teacher; my probation officer; etc…) who you have deliberately disobeyed at any time in your life. (Name more if you can)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
What would cause you to make the decision to not obey the instructions of an authority figure? (Is there something that you are expecting from them before you will obey them? Are you just stubborn?)
7 Checkpoints: Ultimate Authority - Ultimate Freedom
Trudy was a good girl. She usually did what her mom said, but today was different. She was 16 years old today. Today she would get her driver’s license. She would experience freedom like she never had before. Trudy’s mom was a little bit on the strict side. Trudy didn’t think her mom would ever let her grow up. There was so much that she wanted to experience. She just felt like her mom was holding her back. Anyway, there was this guy at school named, Tom. Tom was really popular. He had an edge about him. There was something dangerous about Tom that was attractive to Trudy. Tom had something that Trudy desperately wanted. Tom had freedom, at least that what Trudy thought. Friday night was the big party at Tom’s house and Trudy was invited. She knew that her mom would never go for it. Her mom had heard about teenage parties. She would say that they were nothing more than a bunch of doped up and drunk teens having sex. Friday night came and Trudy really wanted to go to the party so she decided to lie to her mom and tell her that she was going over to her friend Cindy’s house and that she would be out late. Her mom agreed to let her go.
Trudy drove over to Tom’s house. A couple of her friends were already there. She wanted to experience what it meant to be free. She saw the cooler of beer in the corner, popped one open and began to drink. She was standing next to the cooler when Tom walked up to get a beer. Their eyes met, and Tom began to talk to her. She couldn’t believe it. Tom was actually talking to her. They both downed a couple more beers. She was really experiencing freedom now. Half way through the party Tom had managed to corner her in the bathroom, and then tried to take advantage of her. Luckily, her friend, Rachel, had seen Tom follow her in, and was able to stop him. When Tom left, Trudy was on the floor in the corner of the bathroom crying. She couldn’t believe what had happened. Is this what freedom felt like? If this was freedom, then it was definitely overrated. Rachel took her home. When Trudy got home, she saw her mom and told her everything that had happened. They both cried. Trudy cried because of the experience, and her mom cried because she never wanted Trudy to have to experience something like that.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
Everyone is always following something or someone. If you aren’t following someone (parents, teachers, law enforcement, friends), then you are following some idea, and that idea holds you captive. People’s idea of complete freedom is interesting, because whatever they are going for is defined. You would think that true freedom is completely undefined. I can do whatever I want. There will always be boundaries. Let’s pretend that there are absolutely no rules whatsoever. I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
How many of you have seen the movie Braveheart? Braveheart is the story of a Scottish man named William Wallace. During his time, the English ruled the Scottish. The English would come in on the day of a wedding and would rape the bride so that she would hopefully become pregnant with an English baby and they would in turn ‘breed’ the Scottish out. The Scottish lived in fear of the English. William Wallace stepped up and began to lead the Scottish to victories over the English. Eventually he was captured and was to be tortured to death by tying his intestines to a horse and having the horse pull them out. What was his last word? FREEDOM!!!!
Eventually, the Scottish won their freedom from the English. What do you think the Scottish did? They set up their own government. They made their rules to live by, and set up men to enforce the laws.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
God designed us. The Bible says that God knew you even before you were born. He knows what is best for our lives. He knows what rules to live by. They are pretty much common sense.
Do to others, as you would have them do to you.
The greatest commandment is ‘Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, and strength.’ The second greatest commandment is like it, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Honor your father and mother that it may be well with you….
Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
#1 – If you don’t then you will be subject to punishment by the authorities.
#2 - It is a conscience issue. If the government is asking something of you that is contrary to what God asks, then we must follow God rather than men, but be prepared to pay the consequences for that act. (Acts 5:29)
#3 – For Jesus sake (When Jesus returns we want to be found faithful)
God wants us to have the best life possible.
That means that we trust God.
That means that we set up solid moral boundaries.
That means that we learn to see the world the way that God sees it.
That means that we make sure that we have healthy friendships.
That means that we make sure that we are making good choices.
That also means that we listen to and obey the authorities that God has placed in our lives.
------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
1) How would you define freedom?
Notes – Hopefully this is pretty straightforward. Then again….=)
2) What keeps you from experiencing freedom in your life?
Notes – This is getting at any rules or restrictions that they have on their lives right now. Some of them don’t drive yet. Maybe they don’t have a job so they can’t get any money (no money = no fun)
3) Have you ever done something that your parents or someone else told you would be a bad idea to do, but you did it anyway? Did you find out that they were right?
Notes – As luck would have it they probably won’t have ever experienced anything like this. At least not they will say, but we’ll ask anyway. Who knows maybe someone will be open about this. Another alternative question might be – Have you ever done anything that you know you would get in trouble for if your parents found out? What types of things could have gone wrong because of what you did? What would happen if your parents found out about it?
Trudy drove over to Tom’s house. A couple of her friends were already there. She wanted to experience what it meant to be free. She saw the cooler of beer in the corner, popped one open and began to drink. She was standing next to the cooler when Tom walked up to get a beer. Their eyes met, and Tom began to talk to her. She couldn’t believe it. Tom was actually talking to her. They both downed a couple more beers. She was really experiencing freedom now. Half way through the party Tom had managed to corner her in the bathroom, and then tried to take advantage of her. Luckily, her friend, Rachel, had seen Tom follow her in, and was able to stop him. When Tom left, Trudy was on the floor in the corner of the bathroom crying. She couldn’t believe what had happened. Is this what freedom felt like? If this was freedom, then it was definitely overrated. Rachel took her home. When Trudy got home, she saw her mom and told her everything that had happened. They both cried. Trudy cried because of the experience, and her mom cried because she never wanted Trudy to have to experience something like that.
Freedom is a big deal. Everyone thinks that they have some idea about what Freedom is all about. Some believe that Anarchy is the only true freedom. Spend some time over in Amsterdam’s red light district. It’s a place where anything goes. It’s a place that is full of open prostitution and drug use. Most people don’t want to live that way. People from all over the world want to come to the United States because of the freedom that we have. What does that mean? We do have a government. We have a large police force.
Everyone is always following something or someone. If you aren’t following someone (parents, teachers, law enforcement, friends), then you are following some idea, and that idea holds you captive. People’s idea of complete freedom is interesting, because whatever they are going for is defined. You would think that true freedom is completely undefined. I can do whatever I want. There will always be boundaries. Let’s pretend that there are absolutely no rules whatsoever. I pull a knife out and walk over to _____________ and stab you right in the heart. What will happen to you? You will die. What happened to your freedom? The boundary to your freedom was a choice that I made. That must mean that in a place that you thought you were completely free, you really weren’t. Just the fact there are no rules is a problem, because that in itself is a rule. It is impossible to live in a world without rules, because there will always be rules.
How many of you have seen the movie Braveheart? Braveheart is the story of a Scottish man named William Wallace. During his time, the English ruled the Scottish. The English would come in on the day of a wedding and would rape the bride so that she would hopefully become pregnant with an English baby and they would in turn ‘breed’ the Scottish out. The Scottish lived in fear of the English. William Wallace stepped up and began to lead the Scottish to victories over the English. Eventually he was captured and was to be tortured to death by tying his intestines to a horse and having the horse pull them out. What was his last word? FREEDOM!!!!
Eventually, the Scottish won their freedom from the English. What do you think the Scottish did? They set up their own government. They made their rules to live by, and set up men to enforce the laws.
Freedom is a huge thing. It is an ideal that men strive for. Most stories of heroes have something to do with someone wanting freedom from something.
Boston Tea Party, Revolutionary War, Civil War, Operation: Desert Storm, Operation: Iraqi Freedom
When you become a senior you will probably go on a senior trip, either with a small group of friends, or with your class. A lot of teens go on these senior trips and experience things that they regret for the next several years of their lives. They are free. They are in Cancun or Myrtle Beach or Jamaica or Miami Beach. There is no one looking over their shoulder telling what they can and can’t do. They want to live life to it’s fullest. So they get stupid. They do things that they regret. They destroy relationships. Some teens that have made a commitment to be sexually pure end up giving it all away to someone. I mean isn’t that what it’s all about. Isn’t that fun? Getting drunk and passing out. Throwing up. All because they are now free.
Freedom is not the absence of rules. It isn’t doing whatever pleases me the most. Rules will always be there. But freedom is knowing what rules to follow. Our pledge of allegiance has the phrase “UNDER GOD” in it. Those two words are the key to finding freedom. Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
God designed us. The Bible says that God knew you even before you were born. He knows what is best for our lives. He knows what rules to live by. They are pretty much common sense.
Do to others, as you would have them do to you.
The greatest commandment is ‘Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, and strength.’ The second greatest commandment is like it, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Honor your father and mother that it may be well with you….
Maximum freedom is found under God’s authority.
Romans 13:1-2
1. Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
#1 – If you don’t then you will be subject to punishment by the authorities.
#2 - It is a conscience issue. If the government is asking something of you that is contrary to what God asks, then we must follow God rather than men, but be prepared to pay the consequences for that act. (Acts 5:29)
#3 – For Jesus sake (When Jesus returns we want to be found faithful)
God wants us to have the best life possible.
That means that we trust God.
That means that we set up solid moral boundaries.
That means that we learn to see the world the way that God sees it.
That means that we make sure that we have healthy friendships.
That means that we make sure that we are making good choices.
That also means that we listen to and obey the authorities that God has placed in our lives.
------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
1) How would you define freedom?
Notes – Hopefully this is pretty straightforward. Then again….=)
2) What keeps you from experiencing freedom in your life?
Notes – This is getting at any rules or restrictions that they have on their lives right now. Some of them don’t drive yet. Maybe they don’t have a job so they can’t get any money (no money = no fun)
3) Have you ever done something that your parents or someone else told you would be a bad idea to do, but you did it anyway? Did you find out that they were right?
Notes – As luck would have it they probably won’t have ever experienced anything like this. At least not they will say, but we’ll ask anyway. Who knows maybe someone will be open about this. Another alternative question might be – Have you ever done anything that you know you would get in trouble for if your parents found out? What types of things could have gone wrong because of what you did? What would happen if your parents found out about it?
7 Checkpoints: Wise Choices - God's Will
Sarah sat on the couch with her Bible in her lap. She randomly opened the Bible and dropped her finger on a word. Sarah was about to graduate from high school, and was really scared about her future. What was next for her? Where would she go to college? Should she go to college? The first question she had to answer was, “What do I want to be when I grow up?” Sarah’s little sister, Heather, walked up and sat down beside her.
H – What are you doing?
S – I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be when I grow up?
H – Do you think that the Bible will tell you that?
S – I was kind of hoping…
H – What about a dentist?
S – The office smells, and people’s mouths are gross.
H – How about a lawyer?
S – They work too much.
H – You know my friend’s mom is an administrative assistant, and I think that she likes her job.
S – I don’t know. Does anyone really ever start out in life saying, “I want to be an administrative assistant or I want to be middle management?” Most jobs are just where people end up, and not really what they really want.
H – Sarah, I really don’t care what you decide to be. I look up to you because you are my big sister. I’m more interested in you, than in what you do with your life.
S – Thanks, Heather. You’re the best sister ever!!!
Heather got off the couch, and went into the kitchen to help her mom get dinner ready. Sarah looked down at her Bible to see what verse she had landed on. Maybe it would answer all of her questions.
S – Isaiah 26:3 You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in You.
Somehow Sarah understood that God would take care of her, and that was enough. She closed her Bible and went into the kitchen for dinner.
First things first –
Your future is out there, and I don’t think that it’s a stretch to say that thinking about the future can be a frightening thing. You make decisions every day. Every decision that you make has the potential to change something about your life or the lives of others. Sometimes that change can be very drastic and sometimes not so much.
A man I work with told me that his son is going to head off to the Navy after he graduates which will be in about a month. I said, “That’s neat, but you’re going to have a very sad mother on your hands.” This is her first son leaving the house, and not only is he leaving, there is very real potential that he could be heading into a life that could be very dangerous and life-threatening. Then he told me that his other son is going to start studying to be a lawyer. I told him that his son should make very very sure that he wants to be a lawyer, because he may not like the life that comes with it. Lawyers work excruciating long hours. Those hours are all very detailed, and to my mind, they are stressful. He’ll have to go to very expensive school for several years. At the end of which, he will have school loans in the 100,000’s that will have to be paid off, and the only way to pay bills like that off is to be a lawyer or a doctor. He’ll be stuck.
My neighbor and I work at the same company. When we see each other outside, one of the first questions that we ask is, “How’s work?” He made an interesting comment to me the other day. He said, “My brother in law is starting the interview process to become a policeman this week. I’m really happy for him, because he has wanted to be a policeman for as long as he can remember. Very few people end up doing what they really want to do. Look at me, I consult clients on their companies insurance plans. Doing this for a living never even crossed my mind growing up. I didn’t even know that a job like this existed, but here I am. At least I’m getting paid.”
We all have dreams and goals. Sometimes they come true, and sometimes they don’t. Life happens. You get married. You need money. You have to work to get money. You find a job, and there you are. You are a carpenter’s apprentice. You are a stockboy at Dominick’s. You are working in a bank. For most people these are not dream jobs, but it’s what they do. Then every once in a while someone gets their dream job.
We spend a lot of time wondering what we’re going to be when we grow up. Usually we are really asking ourselves, “What am I going to DO when I grow up? The question we should really be concerned with is “WHO am I going to be, and what does God want me to do for Him?
God’s will for your life is to be like Him, perfect.
Philippians 1:6
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
God calls everyone who believes in him to be in the ministry.
Mathew 28:18-20
And Jesus came up and spoke to them saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
God calls some to be in the ministry AS their job.
God calls some to be in the ministry AT their job.
Ephesians 4:11&12
And God gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors, and some as teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ.
God has chosen to call me to be a pastor, more specifically a youth pastor. I wish I had some magical story about how that happened, but I don’t.
All I know is that when I was graduating from high school, I was on one track, and that was to be a pastor. I sat in my friends car on day after church with her mother, and they asked me where I was going to go to college and what I would major in. I said, “I’m going to Moody Bible Institute in Chicago to be a pastor.” They said, “Really. You’re too spastic to be a pastor. You should be a youth pastor.” So I said, “OK”. So that’s what I did.
Sometimes, I still wake up wondering, “Am I doing what God wants me to do?” I spoke to a woman 2 days ago who confessed to me, “I’m 50 years old, and I still ask the question, What does God want me to do with my life?”
1. Start a relationship with Christ
2. Pray
3. Read your Bible
4. Talk to people about it who can give you good counsel
5. Be alert to what God is doing in your life
-------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L. stands for Breakout Session Leader -
1. Spend some time talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Celebrate their decisions with them. Encourage them on towards their goals.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Why?
BSL – Many of our dreams and aspirations are self-centered. They are what we want.
What God wants has never entered out minds. What is going to bring me pleasure in
This life? When our perspective is that true joy and contentment comes with pleasing
God, then we can begin to really answer that question, and trust that we will be happy
With that pursuit.
2. Encourage them further that their focus needs to be on who they will be as opposed to what they will do. What we do is a direct response to who we are. As adults we know that our career paths hardly characterize us as people.
3. If the group is willing, take some time praying for one another and that we will become what God wants us to become.
H – What are you doing?
S – I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be when I grow up?
H – Do you think that the Bible will tell you that?
S – I was kind of hoping…
H – What about a dentist?
S – The office smells, and people’s mouths are gross.
H – How about a lawyer?
S – They work too much.
H – You know my friend’s mom is an administrative assistant, and I think that she likes her job.
S – I don’t know. Does anyone really ever start out in life saying, “I want to be an administrative assistant or I want to be middle management?” Most jobs are just where people end up, and not really what they really want.
H – Sarah, I really don’t care what you decide to be. I look up to you because you are my big sister. I’m more interested in you, than in what you do with your life.
S – Thanks, Heather. You’re the best sister ever!!!
Heather got off the couch, and went into the kitchen to help her mom get dinner ready. Sarah looked down at her Bible to see what verse she had landed on. Maybe it would answer all of her questions.
S – Isaiah 26:3 You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in You.
Somehow Sarah understood that God would take care of her, and that was enough. She closed her Bible and went into the kitchen for dinner.
First things first –
Your future is out there, and I don’t think that it’s a stretch to say that thinking about the future can be a frightening thing. You make decisions every day. Every decision that you make has the potential to change something about your life or the lives of others. Sometimes that change can be very drastic and sometimes not so much.
A man I work with told me that his son is going to head off to the Navy after he graduates which will be in about a month. I said, “That’s neat, but you’re going to have a very sad mother on your hands.” This is her first son leaving the house, and not only is he leaving, there is very real potential that he could be heading into a life that could be very dangerous and life-threatening. Then he told me that his other son is going to start studying to be a lawyer. I told him that his son should make very very sure that he wants to be a lawyer, because he may not like the life that comes with it. Lawyers work excruciating long hours. Those hours are all very detailed, and to my mind, they are stressful. He’ll have to go to very expensive school for several years. At the end of which, he will have school loans in the 100,000’s that will have to be paid off, and the only way to pay bills like that off is to be a lawyer or a doctor. He’ll be stuck.
My neighbor and I work at the same company. When we see each other outside, one of the first questions that we ask is, “How’s work?” He made an interesting comment to me the other day. He said, “My brother in law is starting the interview process to become a policeman this week. I’m really happy for him, because he has wanted to be a policeman for as long as he can remember. Very few people end up doing what they really want to do. Look at me, I consult clients on their companies insurance plans. Doing this for a living never even crossed my mind growing up. I didn’t even know that a job like this existed, but here I am. At least I’m getting paid.”
We all have dreams and goals. Sometimes they come true, and sometimes they don’t. Life happens. You get married. You need money. You have to work to get money. You find a job, and there you are. You are a carpenter’s apprentice. You are a stockboy at Dominick’s. You are working in a bank. For most people these are not dream jobs, but it’s what they do. Then every once in a while someone gets their dream job.
We spend a lot of time wondering what we’re going to be when we grow up. Usually we are really asking ourselves, “What am I going to DO when I grow up? The question we should really be concerned with is “WHO am I going to be, and what does God want me to do for Him?
God’s will for your life is to be like Him, perfect.
Philippians 1:6
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
God calls everyone who believes in him to be in the ministry.
Mathew 28:18-20
And Jesus came up and spoke to them saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
God calls some to be in the ministry AS their job.
God calls some to be in the ministry AT their job.
Ephesians 4:11&12
And God gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors, and some as teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ.
God has chosen to call me to be a pastor, more specifically a youth pastor. I wish I had some magical story about how that happened, but I don’t.
All I know is that when I was graduating from high school, I was on one track, and that was to be a pastor. I sat in my friends car on day after church with her mother, and they asked me where I was going to go to college and what I would major in. I said, “I’m going to Moody Bible Institute in Chicago to be a pastor.” They said, “Really. You’re too spastic to be a pastor. You should be a youth pastor.” So I said, “OK”. So that’s what I did.
Sometimes, I still wake up wondering, “Am I doing what God wants me to do?” I spoke to a woman 2 days ago who confessed to me, “I’m 50 years old, and I still ask the question, What does God want me to do with my life?”
1. Start a relationship with Christ
2. Pray
3. Read your Bible
4. Talk to people about it who can give you good counsel
5. Be alert to what God is doing in your life
-------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L. stands for Breakout Session Leader -
1. Spend some time talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Celebrate their decisions with them. Encourage them on towards their goals.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Why?
BSL – Many of our dreams and aspirations are self-centered. They are what we want.
What God wants has never entered out minds. What is going to bring me pleasure in
This life? When our perspective is that true joy and contentment comes with pleasing
God, then we can begin to really answer that question, and trust that we will be happy
With that pursuit.
2. Encourage them further that their focus needs to be on who they will be as opposed to what they will do. What we do is a direct response to who we are. As adults we know that our career paths hardly characterize us as people.
3. If the group is willing, take some time praying for one another and that we will become what God wants us to become.
7 Checkpoints: Wise Choices
The bus had just dropped Jamie off in front of his house. That’s when Jamie realized that he had forgotten his homework assignment in his locker at school. This was an important assignment. It meant the difference between passing and failing his Sophmore year.
Jamie didn’t know what to do. Just that morning, his mom had warned him about what would happen if he forgot his homework one more time. He would have to take summer school, and do both his and his sisters chores for the whole summer. He couldn’t tell his mom that he forgot it again. He had to think of something and fast, because his mom had already seen him get off the bus.
Mom – Hi, Jamie. I’ve got some cookies inside. How was school today?
N – Jamie thought to himself,
Jamie – “I’ll avoid the conversation altogether until I think of something.”
Jamie – Hi, Mom. I’m starving. Do we have milk?
N – Jamie wasn’t really starving. He was stalling.
Mom – I asked you how school was today.
Jamie – School is school. It’s not great. It’s not horrible. It’s just school. More importantly, how was your day?
N – Now Jamie’s mom knew that something was going on here. The last time that Jamie asked his mom about her day was…….Never.
Mom – Jamie, where is your homework? I called your history teacher today, and she told me that you had a 3 page worksheet to complete and a chapter to read.
N – Busted. Was there a way out of this? Jamie thought to himself
Jamie – “If I say I forgot it, then I’m stuck in summer school and I’m doing Julie’s chores. History isn’t until after lunch. I can do my homework during lunch, and then noone will ever know that I didn’t do it tonight. I’ll tell my mom that I finished it on the bus. No that won’t work. She’ll want to see it. I’ll tell her that I finished it in study hall. She doesn’t know when my study hall is. That’s what I’ll say.”
Jamie – I finished that in study hall today. It was so easy. The questions were fill in the blank right out of the book. I just read the chapter and answered the questions as I went along. It was so easy. You could have done it.
Mom – I’m going to trust you, Jamie. If you are lying to me, then you will pay the consequences. By the way, I invited your teacher over for dinner tonight. I’m looking forward to talking about what you read today in study hall.Jamie probably didn’t make the wisest choice. Jamie lied to his mother. I wonder what dinner will be like for Jamie.
I want to read something to you. Open your Bibles to Ephesians 5:15-17.
That’s on page ______.
Tonight we are going to focus on those last six words, “The will of the Lord is”
The words, “God’s will,” seem to take on all kinds of different meaning, and bring out different emotions. Sometimes there is fear and uncertainty. Other times there is a indescribably peace and a strength that comes from the comfort of God’.
There’s a new country song out that actually made me cry. I couldn’t help it. It was about a little boy named, “Will”. He was handicapped, and a lady took care of him during the day. She would take him to the park, and they would play. He had a great attitude. It made her realize that if Will could get through the pain that was a part of his life, she could get through the pain that was a part of hers. In the end of the song we learn that Will only has a couple of months left to live, and Will and his mother are leaving to go to California to see a specialist. Will give his babysitter a card that just says, Thank you from Will and God.
That was a really nice play on words, but what is God’s will really? Many people ask the question, “What is God’s will for my life?” How will I know when I have achieved God’s will for my life?
The term “God’s Will” seems to me to be a bit mysterious and unapproachable until we break it down a little bit, and make less scary.
You have a will. You have willpower. “I had to eat that last donut. I just don’t have enough willpower. You got up this morning, because you willed it. You said, “I have to go to school. I will get up, and go.”
Another way to say this is that you have desires. Your teachers and your parents have desires, too. They desire that you get a good education, and that you attend school in order to that. You may not necessarily desire that for yourself, but you accept their desires for you and you go to school.
So lets change the question, “What is God’s desire for my life?” What does God want for me?
#1 – God wants you to have a relationship with Him.
1 Corinthians 1;9 – “God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have everlasting life.”
Jesus Christ died so that this would be possible. He shed His own blood on the cross for you and for me. He loves you that much. You need to hear that, “God loves you. He cares about you and he has a wonderful plan for your life.”
#2 – God wants you to have a good life.
John 10:10 – I came that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
God created you on purpose. He also created you for a purpose. God desires that we worship Him. He desires that we grow to be more like Him.
Philippians 1:6 – “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He desires that we tell others about him. He desires that we have close relationships with eachother, and that we serve eachother
#3 – God wants your desires to be His desires.
Jamie’s mom and his teacher both want Jamie to succeed. They don’t want Jamie to fail and have to go through summer school to catch back up with his friends. Jamie wants to have fun and ‘enjoy life’. He doesn’t want to spend his time doing homework. He’ll do much better in school if he chooses to desire the same thing that his mom desires.
Tom wants to be an awesome drummer someday. When his teacher tells him that he will need to practice several times a week, he’s telling him because he wants Tom to succeed. If Tom chooses not to be obedient to his teacher, then he will only be a mediocre drummer who is capable of keeping a beat with a few little cymbal crashes for emphasis.
We all have choices to make every day. We can be wise or we can be foolish about our choices. When your desires are the same as God’s desires, then you will be making wise choices, unlike our friend, Jamie.
N – Later that afternoon Jamie walked up to his mom in the kitchen, because he knew that he had to make things right.
Jamie – Mom. I have something to tell you. I lied to you earlier. I didn’t do my homework yet, and I forgot it all in my locker. I guess that this means that I will be doing Julie’s chores for the summer, huh.
Mom – Jamie, I know that you lied to me. I’m your mother. It hurt that you didn’t think that you could tell me the truth the first time. I am glad that you were wise enough to come and set things straight. You will have to do some of Julie’s chores this summer, but because of your honesty you’ll only have to do them twice a week. As for your homework, your teacher is bringing over an extra copy of the book and an extra copy of the worksheet. I called her when I realized that you weren’t telling me the truth. She’ll be here in about an hour for dinner.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L stands for Breakout Session Leader -
Have you ever been in a situation like Jamie’s? What did you do? Were you wise?
BSL – Story time. If you can think of a story from your own life, then share it. Let them
Do the same. Wise = Choosing right
What is your will? What is your will for being here tonight? Why are you here? What is it about The Grip that satisfies your will?
BSL – Let them answer how they want. Encourage all of the answers, and really
Encourage the great answers. J
1) Julie rushed home. “Good”, she thought, I beat Mom to the mailbox. Midterm progress reports were out. The failure notice in geometry would definitely not be a big hit. Since the divorce, Julie’s mother had been bugging her to improve her grades. Julie had tried, but Mr. Bradshaw didn’t teach geometry very well. Julie vowed to improve her grades. She knew she could do better. Why upset her mom when the quarter grades don’t count anyway?
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Genesis 12:11-13
2 Kings 6:19-23
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 20:17
Jeremiah 17:9
2) Kim’s parents believed her again when she told them she didn’t know she was an hour late. They trusted her. Kim didn’t think it was her fault that she had to stretch the truth so often. She believed she wouldn’t have to do it at all if her parents weren’t so strict. Her curfew was just too early. All of her friends were allowed to stay out much later. Kim had tried talking to her parents several times, but they didn’t seem to listen.
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 23:25
Proverbs 30:11
Romans 7:11
Romans 7:18-23
Colossians 3:20
BSL – Pick one of the 2 above situations. Have the students in your group look up the
Verses. You may get nothing out of the verse or it may be great. Just have an open talk.
Jamie didn’t know what to do. Just that morning, his mom had warned him about what would happen if he forgot his homework one more time. He would have to take summer school, and do both his and his sisters chores for the whole summer. He couldn’t tell his mom that he forgot it again. He had to think of something and fast, because his mom had already seen him get off the bus.
Mom – Hi, Jamie. I’ve got some cookies inside. How was school today?
N – Jamie thought to himself,
Jamie – “I’ll avoid the conversation altogether until I think of something.”
Jamie – Hi, Mom. I’m starving. Do we have milk?
N – Jamie wasn’t really starving. He was stalling.
Mom – I asked you how school was today.
Jamie – School is school. It’s not great. It’s not horrible. It’s just school. More importantly, how was your day?
N – Now Jamie’s mom knew that something was going on here. The last time that Jamie asked his mom about her day was…….Never.
Mom – Jamie, where is your homework? I called your history teacher today, and she told me that you had a 3 page worksheet to complete and a chapter to read.
N – Busted. Was there a way out of this? Jamie thought to himself
Jamie – “If I say I forgot it, then I’m stuck in summer school and I’m doing Julie’s chores. History isn’t until after lunch. I can do my homework during lunch, and then noone will ever know that I didn’t do it tonight. I’ll tell my mom that I finished it on the bus. No that won’t work. She’ll want to see it. I’ll tell her that I finished it in study hall. She doesn’t know when my study hall is. That’s what I’ll say.”
Jamie – I finished that in study hall today. It was so easy. The questions were fill in the blank right out of the book. I just read the chapter and answered the questions as I went along. It was so easy. You could have done it.
Mom – I’m going to trust you, Jamie. If you are lying to me, then you will pay the consequences. By the way, I invited your teacher over for dinner tonight. I’m looking forward to talking about what you read today in study hall.Jamie probably didn’t make the wisest choice. Jamie lied to his mother. I wonder what dinner will be like for Jamie.
I want to read something to you. Open your Bibles to Ephesians 5:15-17.
That’s on page ______.
Tonight we are going to focus on those last six words, “The will of the Lord is”
The words, “God’s will,” seem to take on all kinds of different meaning, and bring out different emotions. Sometimes there is fear and uncertainty. Other times there is a indescribably peace and a strength that comes from the comfort of God’.
There’s a new country song out that actually made me cry. I couldn’t help it. It was about a little boy named, “Will”. He was handicapped, and a lady took care of him during the day. She would take him to the park, and they would play. He had a great attitude. It made her realize that if Will could get through the pain that was a part of his life, she could get through the pain that was a part of hers. In the end of the song we learn that Will only has a couple of months left to live, and Will and his mother are leaving to go to California to see a specialist. Will give his babysitter a card that just says, Thank you from Will and God.
That was a really nice play on words, but what is God’s will really? Many people ask the question, “What is God’s will for my life?” How will I know when I have achieved God’s will for my life?
The term “God’s Will” seems to me to be a bit mysterious and unapproachable until we break it down a little bit, and make less scary.
You have a will. You have willpower. “I had to eat that last donut. I just don’t have enough willpower. You got up this morning, because you willed it. You said, “I have to go to school. I will get up, and go.”
Another way to say this is that you have desires. Your teachers and your parents have desires, too. They desire that you get a good education, and that you attend school in order to that. You may not necessarily desire that for yourself, but you accept their desires for you and you go to school.
So lets change the question, “What is God’s desire for my life?” What does God want for me?
#1 – God wants you to have a relationship with Him.
1 Corinthians 1;9 – “God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have everlasting life.”
Jesus Christ died so that this would be possible. He shed His own blood on the cross for you and for me. He loves you that much. You need to hear that, “God loves you. He cares about you and he has a wonderful plan for your life.”
#2 – God wants you to have a good life.
John 10:10 – I came that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
God created you on purpose. He also created you for a purpose. God desires that we worship Him. He desires that we grow to be more like Him.
Philippians 1:6 – “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He desires that we tell others about him. He desires that we have close relationships with eachother, and that we serve eachother
#3 – God wants your desires to be His desires.
Jamie’s mom and his teacher both want Jamie to succeed. They don’t want Jamie to fail and have to go through summer school to catch back up with his friends. Jamie wants to have fun and ‘enjoy life’. He doesn’t want to spend his time doing homework. He’ll do much better in school if he chooses to desire the same thing that his mom desires.
Tom wants to be an awesome drummer someday. When his teacher tells him that he will need to practice several times a week, he’s telling him because he wants Tom to succeed. If Tom chooses not to be obedient to his teacher, then he will only be a mediocre drummer who is capable of keeping a beat with a few little cymbal crashes for emphasis.
We all have choices to make every day. We can be wise or we can be foolish about our choices. When your desires are the same as God’s desires, then you will be making wise choices, unlike our friend, Jamie.
N – Later that afternoon Jamie walked up to his mom in the kitchen, because he knew that he had to make things right.
Jamie – Mom. I have something to tell you. I lied to you earlier. I didn’t do my homework yet, and I forgot it all in my locker. I guess that this means that I will be doing Julie’s chores for the summer, huh.
Mom – Jamie, I know that you lied to me. I’m your mother. It hurt that you didn’t think that you could tell me the truth the first time. I am glad that you were wise enough to come and set things straight. You will have to do some of Julie’s chores this summer, but because of your honesty you’ll only have to do them twice a week. As for your homework, your teacher is bringing over an extra copy of the book and an extra copy of the worksheet. I called her when I realized that you weren’t telling me the truth. She’ll be here in about an hour for dinner.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide B.S.L stands for Breakout Session Leader -
Have you ever been in a situation like Jamie’s? What did you do? Were you wise?
BSL – Story time. If you can think of a story from your own life, then share it. Let them
Do the same. Wise = Choosing right
What is your will? What is your will for being here tonight? Why are you here? What is it about The Grip that satisfies your will?
BSL – Let them answer how they want. Encourage all of the answers, and really
Encourage the great answers. J
1) Julie rushed home. “Good”, she thought, I beat Mom to the mailbox. Midterm progress reports were out. The failure notice in geometry would definitely not be a big hit. Since the divorce, Julie’s mother had been bugging her to improve her grades. Julie had tried, but Mr. Bradshaw didn’t teach geometry very well. Julie vowed to improve her grades. She knew she could do better. Why upset her mom when the quarter grades don’t count anyway?
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Genesis 12:11-13
2 Kings 6:19-23
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 20:17
Jeremiah 17:9
2) Kim’s parents believed her again when she told them she didn’t know she was an hour late. They trusted her. Kim didn’t think it was her fault that she had to stretch the truth so often. She believed she wouldn’t have to do it at all if her parents weren’t so strict. Her curfew was just too early. All of her friends were allowed to stay out much later. Kim had tried talking to her parents several times, but they didn’t seem to listen.
What would you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What should you do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
What would Jesus do in Julie’s situation? Reason?
Psalm 35:20
Proverbs 23:25
Proverbs 30:11
Romans 7:11
Romans 7:18-23
Colossians 3:20
BSL – Pick one of the 2 above situations. Have the students in your group look up the
Verses. You may get nothing out of the verse or it may be great. Just have an open talk.
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - Accountability
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life and that you might have it abundantly.
Paraphrase – Jesus came so that I could have a good life.
What is a good life?
A life that fulfills it’s reason for being. Anything short of that, falls short of having a good life. True fulfillment in life comes when we become what we were created to become.
You and I were created in God’s image. That’s exciting. That means that you and I are on a spiritual journey. That’s something that can’t be said about anything else that has ever been created.
We were created to worship God. Worshipping God is a privilege that has been reserved for you and me, people.
When you worship something or someone, you are saying, “You are worthy of my time” “You are worthy of my resources” “You are worth it”
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity show yourself an example of those who believe.
How many of you would agree that adults sometimes have a tendency to look down at young people. ____________________ That’s typically because recklessness, disrespect, apathy, selfishness, and foolishness are usually associated with young people’s behavior.
One of the ways that we show God that He’s worth it, is by listening to what He has to say and doing it.
What are some examples of Speech ____________ Conduct _____________ etc…?
That’s nice that we have an idea of what God wants us to do, but the big question is HOW???????
1) Be with the right people…
Proverbs 13:20 – He who walks with the wise will become wise, but he is the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Does anyone remember the difference between someone who is wise and someone who is a fool?
A wise friend is a good friend – Good friends know the difference between right and wrong. Good friends make good decisions. IT IS ALWAYS EASIER TO DO THE RIGHT THING WHEN YOU ARE WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
A foolish friend is not a good friend – A foolish person also know the difference between right and wrong, and chooses to do the wrong. They aren’t ignorant. They just aren’t interested in doing right regardless of the consequences, and they will drag you down with them.
That brings me to another reason we were created.
We were created to have deep and meaningful relationships with each other.
2) Be accountable
Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another
It’s called accountability.
If I am smart, then I’m going to surround myself with wise friends who will let me know when I am not being wise. They will let me know when I am making bad decisions in my speech, my conduct, my love, my faith, and my purity.
They will hold me to a standard.
-------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Give each person in the group a blank piece of paper and a pen.
Read 1 Timothy 4:12
Now Read it again and each time you come to a description (Speech, Conduct, Love, etc…) have a person write down that word.
If you run out of words, then just do it all again. If you run out of people, then just have some people do two.
Now hand out deflated balloons (one per person)
Have each person roll up their piece of paper and stick it inside the balloon.
Blow up the balloons and tie them off.
Put all the balloons in the middle of the group.
Each person, when it is there turn will take a balloon, pop it, read the paper, and give 2 examples (1 good and 1 bad)
Speech – Good – Thank you, mom….
Bad – You’re a moron….
BSL – Be sure to participate in this exercise with your group.
I have come that you might have life and that you might have it abundantly.
Paraphrase – Jesus came so that I could have a good life.
What is a good life?
A life that fulfills it’s reason for being. Anything short of that, falls short of having a good life. True fulfillment in life comes when we become what we were created to become.
You and I were created in God’s image. That’s exciting. That means that you and I are on a spiritual journey. That’s something that can’t be said about anything else that has ever been created.
We were created to worship God. Worshipping God is a privilege that has been reserved for you and me, people.
When you worship something or someone, you are saying, “You are worthy of my time” “You are worthy of my resources” “You are worth it”
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity show yourself an example of those who believe.
How many of you would agree that adults sometimes have a tendency to look down at young people. ____________________ That’s typically because recklessness, disrespect, apathy, selfishness, and foolishness are usually associated with young people’s behavior.
One of the ways that we show God that He’s worth it, is by listening to what He has to say and doing it.
What are some examples of Speech ____________ Conduct _____________ etc…?
That’s nice that we have an idea of what God wants us to do, but the big question is HOW???????
1) Be with the right people…
Proverbs 13:20 – He who walks with the wise will become wise, but he is the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Does anyone remember the difference between someone who is wise and someone who is a fool?
A wise friend is a good friend – Good friends know the difference between right and wrong. Good friends make good decisions. IT IS ALWAYS EASIER TO DO THE RIGHT THING WHEN YOU ARE WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
A foolish friend is not a good friend – A foolish person also know the difference between right and wrong, and chooses to do the wrong. They aren’t ignorant. They just aren’t interested in doing right regardless of the consequences, and they will drag you down with them.
That brings me to another reason we were created.
We were created to have deep and meaningful relationships with each other.
2) Be accountable
Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another
It’s called accountability.
If I am smart, then I’m going to surround myself with wise friends who will let me know when I am not being wise. They will let me know when I am making bad decisions in my speech, my conduct, my love, my faith, and my purity.
They will hold me to a standard.
-------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Give each person in the group a blank piece of paper and a pen.
Read 1 Timothy 4:12
Now Read it again and each time you come to a description (Speech, Conduct, Love, etc…) have a person write down that word.
If you run out of words, then just do it all again. If you run out of people, then just have some people do two.
Now hand out deflated balloons (one per person)
Have each person roll up their piece of paper and stick it inside the balloon.
Blow up the balloons and tie them off.
Put all the balloons in the middle of the group.
Each person, when it is there turn will take a balloon, pop it, read the paper, and give 2 examples (1 good and 1 bad)
Speech – Good – Thank you, mom….
Bad – You’re a moron….
BSL – Be sure to participate in this exercise with your group.
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - The Real Deal
What type of friend are you?
If you were a company, what would your name be, and what would you do?
Example 1: Mary’s nickel and dime store. I only give people the minimum.
Example 2: Susie’s Sunshine Palace. I try to make everybody happy.
Can you tell the difference between a REAL friend and a FAKE one?
Have them expand on their answers. Compare their answers to what a counterfeit
friend really looks like. 1) The direction of the relationship 2) Self-destructive
behavior. 3) A lack of solid convictions.
What does it mean to love someone?
What does a loving friendship look like?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a good passage to look through. The point is that a true
friend is more interested in you as a person, than they are in your friendship. They
will do what they have to do to help you make wise choices, even if it means
sacrificing your friendship.
If you were a company, what would your name be, and what would you do?
Example 1: Mary’s nickel and dime store. I only give people the minimum.
Example 2: Susie’s Sunshine Palace. I try to make everybody happy.
Can you tell the difference between a REAL friend and a FAKE one?
Have them expand on their answers. Compare their answers to what a counterfeit
friend really looks like. 1) The direction of the relationship 2) Self-destructive
behavior. 3) A lack of solid convictions.
What does it mean to love someone?
What does a loving friendship look like?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a good passage to look through. The point is that a true
friend is more interested in you as a person, than they are in your friendship. They
will do what they have to do to help you make wise choices, even if it means
sacrificing your friendship.
Saturday, March 3, 2007
7 Checkpoints: Healthy Friendships - Blue Skies
Three friends were lying in the grass underneath the stars one night, when they began to wonder out loud what they were. The first one said that they were fireflies that were stuck. The second one said that they were dead people looking down on us. The third one said that they were balls of gas burning millions of miles away.
Two boys and a girl were walking to school one day. They were talking to eachother about why the sky was blue.
The first boy said that the sky was blue because the earth is 75% water, water is reflective, and the sunlight bounces off of the water and back to the sky causing it to look blue.
The second boy said that the sky was blue because it was supposed to be.
The girl said that the sky is blue because it isn’t gray. If it were filled with rain and storms, then it wouldn’t be blue.
Who’s right?
How many of you like to watch storms at night. They are pretty awesome right. What happens when it storms? Damage. Things get damaged or destroyed. Lightning is powerful. My friend was in Vegas once where it rains about 2% of the year. He was there during a storm. He could see the desert from his room, and he watched the lightning hit the ground. ‘BAM’ and then sand would fly up from the force of the lightning.
The sky is something beautiful when it’s clear and blue. It’s safe. It’s fun. It has a real positive effect on our attitudes. When the sky is gray, we call it gloomy and depressing. The sky would always be blue if it weren’t for the rain and bad weather.
Proverbs 13:20
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Let me tell you what this is not saying: There are youth ministries in our community who would have you believe that if a person is not a Christian, then you should not hang out with them. The Bible doesn’t teach that. Jesus built relationships with everyone. He did not shun someone because of his or her lifestyle.
This verse raises a few questions:
1) What is a fool?
a. A fool is someone who knows right from wrong and chooses to do the wrong. They simply don’t care about doing right. They aren’t ignorant. They are just uninterested.
2) Are you a fool?
3) Do you hang with fools?
4) Who do I know that’s wise?
Just because you hang around fools, doesn’t mean that you will become a fool. It means that sooner or later something bad will happen to you.
You were created by God to have a great life. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Most people go through life and never really experience it the way that God intended them to. We make bad decisions. We hang with people who make bad decisions.
You might find this interesting:
When I was growing up, surveys said that the top 3 greatest influences in my life were:
1) Spiritual leaders
2) Teachers
3) Parents
That list has changed. Guess whom the top three influences are in your life:
1) Parents
2) Media
3) Friends are the number one influence
Your friends are the most powerful influence in your life. Your friends have more influence over you than anybody, including yourself and even including God.
Do you know why? Because we all have 3 basic HUGE needs –
I want to be loved.
I want to be people to look at me and know that I can do whatever it is.
I want to belong (I want to be accepted)
On the questions that we asked last week, most of you said that acceptance isn’t important to you. Apparently, it is important. It is actually one of the most important things in your life. Just chew on that for a little bit.
Everyone has some goals for what they want their lives to look like. Girls have been planning their marriages since they were 10 and 12 years old. Your future isn’t just about a job. It’s about who will you be. What kind of man will you be? What kind of woman will you be?
Your friendships determine the direction and the quality of your life. Choose your friends wisely.
Two boys and a girl were walking to school one day. They were talking to eachother about why the sky was blue.
The first boy said that the sky was blue because the earth is 75% water, water is reflective, and the sunlight bounces off of the water and back to the sky causing it to look blue.
The second boy said that the sky was blue because it was supposed to be.
The girl said that the sky is blue because it isn’t gray. If it were filled with rain and storms, then it wouldn’t be blue.
Who’s right?
How many of you like to watch storms at night. They are pretty awesome right. What happens when it storms? Damage. Things get damaged or destroyed. Lightning is powerful. My friend was in Vegas once where it rains about 2% of the year. He was there during a storm. He could see the desert from his room, and he watched the lightning hit the ground. ‘BAM’ and then sand would fly up from the force of the lightning.
The sky is something beautiful when it’s clear and blue. It’s safe. It’s fun. It has a real positive effect on our attitudes. When the sky is gray, we call it gloomy and depressing. The sky would always be blue if it weren’t for the rain and bad weather.
Proverbs 13:20
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Let me tell you what this is not saying: There are youth ministries in our community who would have you believe that if a person is not a Christian, then you should not hang out with them. The Bible doesn’t teach that. Jesus built relationships with everyone. He did not shun someone because of his or her lifestyle.
This verse raises a few questions:
1) What is a fool?
a. A fool is someone who knows right from wrong and chooses to do the wrong. They simply don’t care about doing right. They aren’t ignorant. They are just uninterested.
2) Are you a fool?
3) Do you hang with fools?
4) Who do I know that’s wise?
Just because you hang around fools, doesn’t mean that you will become a fool. It means that sooner or later something bad will happen to you.
You were created by God to have a great life. Jesus said, I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly. Most people go through life and never really experience it the way that God intended them to. We make bad decisions. We hang with people who make bad decisions.
You might find this interesting:
When I was growing up, surveys said that the top 3 greatest influences in my life were:
1) Spiritual leaders
2) Teachers
3) Parents
That list has changed. Guess whom the top three influences are in your life:
1) Parents
2) Media
3) Friends are the number one influence
Your friends are the most powerful influence in your life. Your friends have more influence over you than anybody, including yourself and even including God.
Do you know why? Because we all have 3 basic HUGE needs –
I want to be loved.
I want to be people to look at me and know that I can do whatever it is.
I want to belong (I want to be accepted)
On the questions that we asked last week, most of you said that acceptance isn’t important to you. Apparently, it is important. It is actually one of the most important things in your life. Just chew on that for a little bit.
Everyone has some goals for what they want their lives to look like. Girls have been planning their marriages since they were 10 and 12 years old. Your future isn’t just about a job. It’s about who will you be. What kind of man will you be? What kind of woman will you be?
Your friendships determine the direction and the quality of your life. Choose your friends wisely.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Sexual Purity
Two birds were singing in an oak tree one Sunday morning. It was about 3am. Most people were sound asleep, and they couldn’t hear the birds, but there were 2 people who heard the birds loud and clear. They knew that the birds chirping meant that the morning had arrived, and their parents would realize that they weren’t at home in their beds where they were supposed to be. Jimmy started the car and drove Liz home.
They were both a little embarrassed by the night before. Liz had never been in that situation before. She was 15years old, and she wasn’t sure what to think about what had happened. She had liked Jimmy for about a year. Finally, Jimmy asked her out. They went to the movie theater, but she doesn’t remember what the movie was. She doesn’t even remember watching. She was too busy with Jimmy to know what was going on around her. It was obvious that Jimmy hadn’t intended on watching the movie. She wondered why he agreed to watch a chick-flick with her. On their way home, Jimmy pulled over and parked the car in an obscure out of the way parking lot. He laid out a blanket on the grass, and pulled out some sandwiches and Dr. Pepper. They laid down on the blanket and looked up at the stars for at least an hour. But that hour wasn’t just spent watching the stars in the sky. Everything had happened so fast. The next thing she knew the birds were chirping.
Jimmy was just doing what his friends told him he should do on the date to make it really romantic and meaningful. She’ll love it, and so will you… He had never been in that situation before either.
When Liz got home, she snuck through the front door and up to her bedroom to crawl into bed. She felt a body in her bed, and it made her jump. Then the body spoke, “Liz, what time is it?” It was her mom.
What happened that night between Liz and Jimmy? Why were they embarrassed? What will it be like when they see each other at school on Monday? How will Liz answer her mom’s questions? What is sexual purity and why is it important?
Purity paves the way for Intimacy. The greater your level of purity, the greater the level of real intimacy that you will be able to experience with your future husband or wife.
Sex isn’t something that’s talked about in settings like this often. It’s something that people talk about quite frequently in other settings though. Chat rooms are full of sexual innuendos, and slighted solicitations for sex. There are websites whose sole purpose is to rate how sexable people are. Many people want to be sexually appealing to other people. Who would you ‘do’ it you had the chance?
The sex that is communicated most often in our society is a past-time. It’s a lifestyle. It’s the way that we are supposed to be. It’s just what we do. The term ‘friends with benefits’ has become common and accepted as a lifestyle. Some of us set up boundaries for how far we will go, but we base those boundaries on what is comfortable for us, and what we think is ok and what we think is not ok. We know the consequences of premarital sex, but we dismiss them.
I have prepared a questionnaire for you to respond to and discuss in your Breakout Sessions. Be honest with your answers.
They were both a little embarrassed by the night before. Liz had never been in that situation before. She was 15years old, and she wasn’t sure what to think about what had happened. She had liked Jimmy for about a year. Finally, Jimmy asked her out. They went to the movie theater, but she doesn’t remember what the movie was. She doesn’t even remember watching. She was too busy with Jimmy to know what was going on around her. It was obvious that Jimmy hadn’t intended on watching the movie. She wondered why he agreed to watch a chick-flick with her. On their way home, Jimmy pulled over and parked the car in an obscure out of the way parking lot. He laid out a blanket on the grass, and pulled out some sandwiches and Dr. Pepper. They laid down on the blanket and looked up at the stars for at least an hour. But that hour wasn’t just spent watching the stars in the sky. Everything had happened so fast. The next thing she knew the birds were chirping.
Jimmy was just doing what his friends told him he should do on the date to make it really romantic and meaningful. She’ll love it, and so will you… He had never been in that situation before either.
When Liz got home, she snuck through the front door and up to her bedroom to crawl into bed. She felt a body in her bed, and it made her jump. Then the body spoke, “Liz, what time is it?” It was her mom.
What happened that night between Liz and Jimmy? Why were they embarrassed? What will it be like when they see each other at school on Monday? How will Liz answer her mom’s questions? What is sexual purity and why is it important?
Purity paves the way for Intimacy. The greater your level of purity, the greater the level of real intimacy that you will be able to experience with your future husband or wife.
Sex isn’t something that’s talked about in settings like this often. It’s something that people talk about quite frequently in other settings though. Chat rooms are full of sexual innuendos, and slighted solicitations for sex. There are websites whose sole purpose is to rate how sexable people are. Many people want to be sexually appealing to other people. Who would you ‘do’ it you had the chance?
The sex that is communicated most often in our society is a past-time. It’s a lifestyle. It’s the way that we are supposed to be. It’s just what we do. The term ‘friends with benefits’ has become common and accepted as a lifestyle. Some of us set up boundaries for how far we will go, but we base those boundaries on what is comfortable for us, and what we think is ok and what we think is not ok. We know the consequences of premarital sex, but we dismiss them.
I have prepared a questionnaire for you to respond to and discuss in your Breakout Sessions. Be honest with your answers.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Sexual Purity (Teen Questionaire)
Define Sexual Purity in your own words (what does it mean to be sexually pure?)
Does sexual purity matter? What’s the big deal with remaining sexually pure?
What is a virgin?
Is it reasonable to expect us to remain virgins until we are married?
How do you respond to these quotes?
Educators who tell teenagers that sex is just part of growing up and that it can be a "loving and learning" experience outside of marriage don't understand that men and women are created by God "in His image" and are not the result of an amoral, animalistic, evolutionary process. God teaches that sex outside of marriage is wrong and that there will be consequences for such actions."(John Ankerberg & John Weldon, The Myth of Safe Sex)
RESPONSE-
"Purity doesn't happen by accident; it requires obedience to God. But this obedience is not burdensome or overbearing. Impurity is a grimy film that coats the soul, a shadow that blocks light and darkens our countenance. Without purity, God's gift of sexuality becomes a destruction game. A relationship devoid of purity is soon reduced to nothing more than two bodies grasping at and demanding pleasure. Without purity, the mind becomes a slave to depravity, tossed about by every sinful craving and imagination."(Joshua Harris ... I Kissed Dating Goodbye (A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationships)
RESPONSE-
Our society is starving for intimacy. And many of the lies we believe in our culture have to do with our hunger for relationship. We want acceptance, loving relationships and deep intimacy, and yet we believe the lie that sex will satisfy our hunger. It's true that we are profoundly sexual beings, but it's time to examine some of the lies we feast on: the lie that premarital sex is one of our unalienable rights, the lie that sexual intercourse is the route to intimacy, and the lie that premarital abstinence is obsolete at best and repressive at worst.
RESPONSE-
Does sexual purity matter? What’s the big deal with remaining sexually pure?
What is a virgin?
Is it reasonable to expect us to remain virgins until we are married?
How do you respond to these quotes?
Educators who tell teenagers that sex is just part of growing up and that it can be a "loving and learning" experience outside of marriage don't understand that men and women are created by God "in His image" and are not the result of an amoral, animalistic, evolutionary process. God teaches that sex outside of marriage is wrong and that there will be consequences for such actions."(John Ankerberg & John Weldon, The Myth of Safe Sex)
RESPONSE-
"Purity doesn't happen by accident; it requires obedience to God. But this obedience is not burdensome or overbearing. Impurity is a grimy film that coats the soul, a shadow that blocks light and darkens our countenance. Without purity, God's gift of sexuality becomes a destruction game. A relationship devoid of purity is soon reduced to nothing more than two bodies grasping at and demanding pleasure. Without purity, the mind becomes a slave to depravity, tossed about by every sinful craving and imagination."(Joshua Harris ... I Kissed Dating Goodbye (A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationships)
RESPONSE-
Our society is starving for intimacy. And many of the lies we believe in our culture have to do with our hunger for relationship. We want acceptance, loving relationships and deep intimacy, and yet we believe the lie that sex will satisfy our hunger. It's true that we are profoundly sexual beings, but it's time to examine some of the lies we feast on: the lie that premarital sex is one of our unalienable rights, the lie that sexual intercourse is the route to intimacy, and the lie that premarital abstinence is obsolete at best and repressive at worst.
RESPONSE-
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 4)
I don’t want to be funny tonight. I want to be serious. I want to share something from my heart to your heart.
When we started on this topic of our thought life the focus really was supposed to be on sex, and how it impacts our thoughts and our purity.
We ended up somewhere a little more different. It was a place that was a little bit more scary and more intense and full of honesty.
I have these questionnaires that you guys filled out last week. Some of you were bold enough to hand these in. This was an anonymous exercise. Your anonymity is safe. Some of you didn’t hand yours in, and that’s completely ok.
I read through the ones that I received. It really hurt my heart to read the things that are on your minds. I really hurt for you. I was still thinking about everything the next day as I was driving into work, and I felt emotionally overwhelmed by what you guys carry around with you everyday.
Then I thought about those of you who didn’t turn yours in. Either you didn’t know that you could turn them in or you were too embarrassed to turn them in.
I need everyone to know that The Grip is not a place of shame. The Grip is a place that you can find relief from your shame. You are free to just BE here.
This is why: We have a desire to reflect Jesus Christ here, and that’s what he’s like.
If you read about His time here in the New Testament of the Bible you will see very quickly that He was not about making people feel bad about themselves.
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
The papers that I read this week weren’t that. They were filled with despair and hopelessness and confusion. Jesus came that we would have a good life
1 Peter 5:7
Cast your cares upon Him for He cares for you
How do I know that?
Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down His life for His friends
John 3:16
Knowing the mind of God – having the Spirit of God
When we started on this topic of our thought life the focus really was supposed to be on sex, and how it impacts our thoughts and our purity.
We ended up somewhere a little more different. It was a place that was a little bit more scary and more intense and full of honesty.
I have these questionnaires that you guys filled out last week. Some of you were bold enough to hand these in. This was an anonymous exercise. Your anonymity is safe. Some of you didn’t hand yours in, and that’s completely ok.
I read through the ones that I received. It really hurt my heart to read the things that are on your minds. I really hurt for you. I was still thinking about everything the next day as I was driving into work, and I felt emotionally overwhelmed by what you guys carry around with you everyday.
Then I thought about those of you who didn’t turn yours in. Either you didn’t know that you could turn them in or you were too embarrassed to turn them in.
I need everyone to know that The Grip is not a place of shame. The Grip is a place that you can find relief from your shame. You are free to just BE here.
This is why: We have a desire to reflect Jesus Christ here, and that’s what he’s like.
If you read about His time here in the New Testament of the Bible you will see very quickly that He was not about making people feel bad about themselves.
John 10:10
I have come that you might have life, and that you might have it abundantly
The papers that I read this week weren’t that. They were filled with despair and hopelessness and confusion. Jesus came that we would have a good life
1 Peter 5:7
Cast your cares upon Him for He cares for you
How do I know that?
Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down His life for His friends
John 3:16
Knowing the mind of God – having the Spirit of God
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 3)
Maximum Purity = Maximum Intimacy
What do you think of when I say, Intimate?
I’m talking about closeness. It is an absence of barriers or walls in a relationship. When you have impurity in your life, it breeds shame, we don’t want people to get too close when we have something that we don’t want them to know about.
The level of purity that you have in your life will determine the closeness that you will have with others.
As promised, tonight we will be talking about our thought lives…
We are mainly influenced by 3 things: Ourselves (Our own capacity to do wrong), The World (society, culture, etc.), and Satan.
Our focus is on establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries, even in what we think about. So, how do we set limits to the things that we think about? Is that even possible? If so, then how? (Change – Environment, Heart, Mind, Life)
Maximum purity = Maximum Intimacy (How committed to purity are you?)
Scripture Guide:
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
What do you think of when I say, Intimate?
I’m talking about closeness. It is an absence of barriers or walls in a relationship. When you have impurity in your life, it breeds shame, we don’t want people to get too close when we have something that we don’t want them to know about.
The level of purity that you have in your life will determine the closeness that you will have with others.
As promised, tonight we will be talking about our thought lives…
We are mainly influenced by 3 things: Ourselves (Our own capacity to do wrong), The World (society, culture, etc.), and Satan.
Our focus is on establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries, even in what we think about. So, how do we set limits to the things that we think about? Is that even possible? If so, then how? (Change – Environment, Heart, Mind, Life)
Maximum purity = Maximum Intimacy (How committed to purity are you?)
Scripture Guide:
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 2)
Philippians 4:8
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Who knows what B.O. is? B.O. is short for body odor. It is a smell that typically originates in the underarms of a person. It doesn’t have to be smelly armpits to be B.O. It can be a smelly bottom that wasn’t properly cared for.
I want to tell you about 2 people and 1 situation.
1) Smelly Steve. I felt really bad for Steve. I think that he was a Senior when I was a Freshman. He smelled. He never really did his hair. People at school would make fun of him to the point that he had a nickname. Apparently, Steve didn’t mind the smell.
2) Ernst. Ernst was an older man that I worked with a couple of years ago. He would come into work and some days when he would walk by me I would have to hold my breath, and sometimes go to an entirely different area to get away from the smell. Apparently, Ernst didn’t mind the smell.
They must have smelled it, right? How could it be that I would almost gag when he walked by, but He was able to live with the smell all day long? His wife lived with the smell? How? What could be done about that odor?
1) The situation: I was in 6th grade. It was time to go to lunch. Apparently, the teacher smelled or heard something? I still don’t know what exactly happened. Mr. Slaughtervick would not allow us to leave the classroom until someone admitted to creating the smell that he smelled. I really had to go to the bathroom. So I raised my hand? (I had no idea what was going on). He said, “John, are you the one who’s smelling up this room?” I said, “No. I put on my deoderant this morning.” He said,”Most people don’t put deoderant on down there.” I was completely embarrassed, and then he let me go to the bathroom. I don’t think he did ever find out who smelled up the room.
Could I have 2 volunteers:
Walk by me and pretend that I smell and show us how you would react….
Sometimes the things that we think about are nasty. They smell really bad. This talk is about establishing boundaries on what you think about, on what you allow your mind to dwell on. There are certain things that impact what we think about.
Music
TV
DJ’s
Friends
Magazines
Pictures
The Bible is saying that we need to be intentional about what we think about.
…Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let you mind dwell on these things.
Who knows what B.O. is? B.O. is short for body odor. It is a smell that typically originates in the underarms of a person. It doesn’t have to be smelly armpits to be B.O. It can be a smelly bottom that wasn’t properly cared for.
I want to tell you about 2 people and 1 situation.
1) Smelly Steve. I felt really bad for Steve. I think that he was a Senior when I was a Freshman. He smelled. He never really did his hair. People at school would make fun of him to the point that he had a nickname. Apparently, Steve didn’t mind the smell.
2) Ernst. Ernst was an older man that I worked with a couple of years ago. He would come into work and some days when he would walk by me I would have to hold my breath, and sometimes go to an entirely different area to get away from the smell. Apparently, Ernst didn’t mind the smell.
They must have smelled it, right? How could it be that I would almost gag when he walked by, but He was able to live with the smell all day long? His wife lived with the smell? How? What could be done about that odor?
1) The situation: I was in 6th grade. It was time to go to lunch. Apparently, the teacher smelled or heard something? I still don’t know what exactly happened. Mr. Slaughtervick would not allow us to leave the classroom until someone admitted to creating the smell that he smelled. I really had to go to the bathroom. So I raised my hand? (I had no idea what was going on). He said, “John, are you the one who’s smelling up this room?” I said, “No. I put on my deoderant this morning.” He said,”Most people don’t put deoderant on down there.” I was completely embarrassed, and then he let me go to the bathroom. I don’t think he did ever find out who smelled up the room.
Could I have 2 volunteers:
Walk by me and pretend that I smell and show us how you would react….
Sometimes the things that we think about are nasty. They smell really bad. This talk is about establishing boundaries on what you think about, on what you allow your mind to dwell on. There are certain things that impact what we think about.
Music
TV
DJ’s
Friends
Magazines
Pictures
The Bible is saying that we need to be intentional about what we think about.
7 Checkpoints: Moral Boundaries - Thought Life (part 1)
Checkpoint #3 – Moral Boundaries
Principle – Purity paves the way to Intimacy
Critical Question – Are you establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries?
Key passage – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you His Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:18
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Genesis 2:21-24
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Proverbs 28:26
He who trusts himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe
Ephesians 5:15
Be very careful, then, how you live, not as unwise but as wise
Matthew 7:24-27
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.
Proverbs 4:23
Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Sarah and Gretchen were supposed to go to the movies last night, and Gretchen had promised her that she would go with her when she had finished her homework. Gretchen finished up her geometry and was on the way out the door, when her mom stopped her to ask her about the school dance that was coming up in two weeks. Gretchen had told Mike that she would go with him to the school dance. (Enter Mike – Mike was the most popular guy in school. He had it all together; fast car, nice hair, perfect tan, proportionately muscular). Most of the girls at school were hoping that he would ask them out. Unfortunately for the other girls, Mike didn’t. He asked Gretchen. The problem was that her mom had never met Mike or his parents, and that was a big ‘no-no’. So the conversation went like this:
MOM: Are you going with Billy to the dance? I like Billy. He’s a good boy. You should bring him around more often.
GRETCHEN: No. I’m not going with Billy. I’m going with Mike.
MOM: Wait a minute. Who’s Mike? I don’t think I know Mike? Have I ever met Mike?
GRETCHEN: No. You haven’t, but you can trust me. He’s a “good boy”, too. He asked me last week, and I couldn’t say no. He’s the hottest guy in school. Besides, it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. We’re just going to a stupid dance. What’s the big deal?
MOM: The big deal is that you and I had an agreement. You wouldn’t go out with any guys unless I have met him and his parents. That’s important to me.
GRETCHEN: So I guess my life and what I want doesn’t count then does it? Why do you have to make my life so difficult? I’m going to the dance with Mike whether you like it or not.
MOM: No you aren’t. If that’s your attitude, then you’re not going at all. You can stay home, and if Mike still wants to be with you, then he can come over here for dinner. I will not tolerate that tone of voice, either. It’s disrespectful and inappropriate. So, you can call your friend, Sarah, and let her know that she will be on her own tonight.
Gretchen looked at her mom, and thought to herself, “I hate you.”
How many of you have ever had a situation like that in your house? How many of you have ever thought something like that about your mom or dad?
It had been raining for hours, and my brother and I were working with my grandfather one summer in Florida. We were laying grass around a pond on his property. One section of grass weighs about 5lbs. I loaded my wheelbarrow up to the point that my wheel went flat. I picked up the handles and began to push the wheelbarrow around the pond through the mud. I got about 50ft, and I was in pain. I had messed up my back (14 yrs old and I had a bad back already). I spent the rest of the summer laying on my back with hot pads and soaking in the bathtub. Meanwhile, my brother continued working for my grandpa throughout the rest of the summer. When we got back to my home in Michigan, my grandpa paid us for the work that we had done. He gave my brother $1000 and he gave me $500. I took it and said, “Thanks”, but inside I was a little ball of rage just waiting to explode. I got up to my room as fast as I could, and I let loose (quietly). I can tell you that loosing it quietly looks ridiculous. Loosing it loudly looks equally ridiculous. I was so mad that tears were coming down my face. It wasn’t fair. You’re my grandpa, how can you give him twice as much as me? In that moment, I hated him for it.
I don’t think that he ever knew about it, but I sure did. Guess who else did? God did. God saw everything that I was doing “quietly”. He heard every thought that I was thinking.
Our thoughts are so hugely important to God. What you think about is just as important as what you actually say and do. We fantasize about different things. We create alternate realities that we can escape to when real life feels like it’s getting too tough.
Psalm 94:11 says “The Lord knows the thoughts of man”
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
Last year when we talked about having moral boundaries, we focused on your relationships with the opposite sex. What are you going to do when he or she wants a kiss, how about when they want a little bit more? How about when you want a little bit more? Have you established boundaries to help you remain pure? That was mainly focused on staying pure physically. These next few weeks we are going to discover what it means to establish moral boundaries in your thought life. We’ll talk about that secret place in your head that no one else knows about, only you and God. Sometimes we think about things and dwell on things that mess up our mind so bad. I think that this is going to be an extremely important discussion for you to be a part of. You never know what you might take away. It may just change your life.
------------------------------------------------------
Breakout Session Guide -
Have you ever experienced “hate” thoughts toward anybody? What was the situation that led up to that?
Have you ever done anything wrong that noone else knew about, only you? What could have the consequences have been? Is it possible that anyone was hurt by what you did? Are our thoughts that no one knows about have the ability to cause damage even if no one knows about them?
Bad thoughts towards others act as a barrier to a relationship with that other person. They also cause stress for you. Not to mention that we are told to ‘love others’.
What are some ‘secret thoughts’ that teens have that may not be considered good thoughts?
What does your thought life have to do with moral boundaries?
Principle – Purity paves the way to Intimacy
Critical Question – Are you establishing and maintaining godly moral boundaries?
Key passage – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you His Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:18
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Genesis 2:21-24
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Proverbs 28:26
He who trusts himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe
Ephesians 5:15
Be very careful, then, how you live, not as unwise but as wise
Matthew 7:24-27
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.
Proverbs 4:23
Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips
Psalm 119:9-10
How shall a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word. I seek You with all of my heart do not let me stray from Your commands.
Sarah and Gretchen were supposed to go to the movies last night, and Gretchen had promised her that she would go with her when she had finished her homework. Gretchen finished up her geometry and was on the way out the door, when her mom stopped her to ask her about the school dance that was coming up in two weeks. Gretchen had told Mike that she would go with him to the school dance. (Enter Mike – Mike was the most popular guy in school. He had it all together; fast car, nice hair, perfect tan, proportionately muscular). Most of the girls at school were hoping that he would ask them out. Unfortunately for the other girls, Mike didn’t. He asked Gretchen. The problem was that her mom had never met Mike or his parents, and that was a big ‘no-no’. So the conversation went like this:
MOM: Are you going with Billy to the dance? I like Billy. He’s a good boy. You should bring him around more often.
GRETCHEN: No. I’m not going with Billy. I’m going with Mike.
MOM: Wait a minute. Who’s Mike? I don’t think I know Mike? Have I ever met Mike?
GRETCHEN: No. You haven’t, but you can trust me. He’s a “good boy”, too. He asked me last week, and I couldn’t say no. He’s the hottest guy in school. Besides, it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. We’re just going to a stupid dance. What’s the big deal?
MOM: The big deal is that you and I had an agreement. You wouldn’t go out with any guys unless I have met him and his parents. That’s important to me.
GRETCHEN: So I guess my life and what I want doesn’t count then does it? Why do you have to make my life so difficult? I’m going to the dance with Mike whether you like it or not.
MOM: No you aren’t. If that’s your attitude, then you’re not going at all. You can stay home, and if Mike still wants to be with you, then he can come over here for dinner. I will not tolerate that tone of voice, either. It’s disrespectful and inappropriate. So, you can call your friend, Sarah, and let her know that she will be on her own tonight.
Gretchen looked at her mom, and thought to herself, “I hate you.”
How many of you have ever had a situation like that in your house? How many of you have ever thought something like that about your mom or dad?
It had been raining for hours, and my brother and I were working with my grandfather one summer in Florida. We were laying grass around a pond on his property. One section of grass weighs about 5lbs. I loaded my wheelbarrow up to the point that my wheel went flat. I picked up the handles and began to push the wheelbarrow around the pond through the mud. I got about 50ft, and I was in pain. I had messed up my back (14 yrs old and I had a bad back already). I spent the rest of the summer laying on my back with hot pads and soaking in the bathtub. Meanwhile, my brother continued working for my grandpa throughout the rest of the summer. When we got back to my home in Michigan, my grandpa paid us for the work that we had done. He gave my brother $1000 and he gave me $500. I took it and said, “Thanks”, but inside I was a little ball of rage just waiting to explode. I got up to my room as fast as I could, and I let loose (quietly). I can tell you that loosing it quietly looks ridiculous. Loosing it loudly looks equally ridiculous. I was so mad that tears were coming down my face. It wasn’t fair. You’re my grandpa, how can you give him twice as much as me? In that moment, I hated him for it.
I don’t think that he ever knew about it, but I sure did. Guess who else did? God did. God saw everything that I was doing “quietly”. He heard every thought that I was thinking.
Our thoughts are so hugely important to God. What you think about is just as important as what you actually say and do. We fantasize about different things. We create alternate realities that we can escape to when real life feels like it’s getting too tough.
Psalm 94:11 says “The Lord knows the thoughts of man”
Matthew 15:17-20
Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is eliminated?
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual impurity, thefts, lies, slanders.
These are the things that defile the man.
Last year when we talked about having moral boundaries, we focused on your relationships with the opposite sex. What are you going to do when he or she wants a kiss, how about when they want a little bit more? How about when you want a little bit more? Have you established boundaries to help you remain pure? That was mainly focused on staying pure physically. These next few weeks we are going to discover what it means to establish moral boundaries in your thought life. We’ll talk about that secret place in your head that no one else knows about, only you and God. Sometimes we think about things and dwell on things that mess up our mind so bad. I think that this is going to be an extremely important discussion for you to be a part of. You never know what you might take away. It may just change your life.
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Breakout Session Guide -
Have you ever experienced “hate” thoughts toward anybody? What was the situation that led up to that?
Have you ever done anything wrong that noone else knew about, only you? What could have the consequences have been? Is it possible that anyone was hurt by what you did? Are our thoughts that no one knows about have the ability to cause damage even if no one knows about them?
Bad thoughts towards others act as a barrier to a relationship with that other person. They also cause stress for you. Not to mention that we are told to ‘love others’.
What are some ‘secret thoughts’ that teens have that may not be considered good thoughts?
What does your thought life have to do with moral boundaries?
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